


The God Within

by fhsa_archivist



Category: Hercules: The Legendary Journeys, Xena: Warrior Princess
Genre: Alternate Universe, Angst, Episode Related, Hurt/Comfort, Mpreg, Romance
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2005-11-03
Updated: 2006-03-12
Packaged: 2019-02-05 13:36:20
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 12
Words: 47,819
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12795696
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/fhsa_archivist/pseuds/fhsa_archivist
Summary: When Strife is stabbed with the Hinds blood dagger he finds a new way to survive with the help of his friend Joxer (crossover with Xena:wp)





	1. New beginnings

**Author's Note:**

> Note from Haven, the archivist: This story was originally archived at [Fandom Haven Story Archive (FHSA)](http://fanlore.org/wiki/Fandom_Haven_Story_Archive), was scheduled to shut down at the end of 2016. To preserve the archive, I began working with the OTW to transfer the stories to the AO3 as an Open Doors-approved project in November 2017. If you are this creator and the work hasn't transferred to your AO3 account, please contact me using the e-mail address on [Fandom Haven Story Archive collection profile](http://archiveofourown.org/collections/fhsa/profile).

Big thanks to Jo for betaing this for me, sorting out and putting up with my psychobabble ideas :)

 

Based on a plot bunny thrown out by Jessi on the mpreg mailing list (http://groups.yahoo.com/group/mpreg/)

 

Disclaimer: I own nothing in this fic (save Asy) and in any of the other chapters.

 

 

Strife had long since left hysterical panic and was now entering abject terror. Trapped inside his body, unable to move or speak, to even open his eyes he felt the cold sting of the deadly Hinds blood flood through him. Strife screamed within his own mind as he realised even his sense of feeling was fading, he tried to hold on terrified of the darkness that seemed to be swamping him.

 

He cursed himself for getting involved; that he even bothered to cosy up to Ares and Callisto. He should have gone with his instincts, she was a god but she wasn’t one of them, the way she’d jerked Ares around had proved he was right. Ares should never have trusted her.

 

//You know what? I’m gonna go to Zeus. We’re gonna get the gods-- no, that’s stupid. He’s gonna blame me for getting Strife killed, right here!//

 

Hearing remnants of the conversation around him he felt something inside him snap at Ares words.

 

Strife knew he wasn’t well liked and he sucked up to Ares but it wasn’t out of duty despite what the other Gods believed. No one, least of all a God, would put up with being treated like a whipping boy and dogsbody for that. Being told to ‘shut up’ and being constantly pounded on was not his idea of fun but most Olympians weren’t big on family relations so he had to play along to fit in. 

 

*What’s the point in fighting, things can’t be any worse and no one would miss me anyway. No one cares.* Strife thought bitterly as he gathered as much of his power as he could, not to call out for help but to try to reverse the bloods toxic effects. He closed off his mind ignoring everything around him as he concentrated. 

 

Joxer ducked around the side of Ares temple putting his plan on hold when he saw the fury on his Gods face. He’d had to do a double take when he saw Ares companion, Iolaus. Joxer had been following Hercules and Iolaus hoping to catch up with them and join them whilst Xena got her time alone with Gabrielle. He’d drinking in the village Tavern and overheard from the Warlords general chatter that something had been going on down near Ares temple, something that involved Hercules. When the ground had shook he’d felt a chill run through him that he couldn’t explain, he’d just known he had to get to the temple fast. 

 

“The one great evil is here-- as part of that creature that was with her. And we’ve sensed him-- everyone on Olympus has. This-- this force of darkness-- spells the end of all of us-- gods and man alike.” 

 

Joxer couldn’t see his face but Ares sounded upset, he strained to hear Iolaus’s reply as the two walked off but all he could make out was Ares answer of ‘Strife’ and ‘responsibilities’. He wondered what the younger God could have done to cause such chaos and upset.

 

“Strife?” Joxer ducked through the side door of the temple and peered inside, he knew when Strife caused mischief he usually hung around to see the outcome. He frowned wondering where all Ares priests were and why his friend didn’t answer his call. Generally Strife loved to recount his exploits to him, especially the big ones. He walked inside, looking around and expecting his friend to jump out at him from behind a statue.

 

“The ground was shaking, everything feels wrong,” he shivered slightly unable to explain the muggy feeling in his head. The upset and equally pissed off looks on Ares and Iolaus’s faces as they strode out together, something that was miraculous in itself, had prepared him to find Strife sulking and licking his wounds. 

 

Still he didn’t expect to find him on his own and lying on the floor “Strife?” 

 

Joxer felt his heart skip a beat and he stepped forward cautiously “Strife?” he hesitantly asked again, he wondered if had this time Ares had punished Strife until he passed out. Then he saw the blood staining Strife’s front. In a heartbeat he was at the Gods side, dropping to his knees he forced himself to calm as he laid his head on his friends chest. He placed a hand in front of the Gods mouth as he strained to listen for a heartbeat. 

 

The poison was slowly destroying Strife’s organs making his heartbeat slow and his breathing too shallow for mortal ears to hear. Joxer could hear no beats or feel no breaths but he wasn’t even sure if Gods had them, he frantically strained to hear something, anything; *God’s don’t die, they can’t* he thought as he tried to reassure himself. The tone was pleading now and Joxers voice cracked slightly as he spoke. “Strife? Please wake up.”

 

Joxer touched his friend’s face gently; he noticed how unnaturally pale Strife was much more so then normal and swallowed hard, his mind still screamed that Gods didn’t die but a slow feeling of horror was creeping over him challenging that thought. Shaking he pulled Strife onto his lap, cradling him gently “You can’t die, you’re a God and Gods don’t die.” His voice hitched slightly as he spoke “You promised you’d never do anything stupid, you promised!” He held Strife tighter “What did you do? Who did this to you? Was it a punishment?” He took a few deep breaths as his body screamed at the wrongness of it all. God’s were omnipotent, they barely aged and they worked wonders, the idea that one could die terrified Joxer and shook his beliefs deeply. God’s didn’t die, if they did what could be powerful enough to destroy them 

 

He gripped the God tighter “You promised.” he murmured softly, staring into the Gods face as he willed him to wake up. 

 

“Can I call someone? Who can stop this? Zeus? Ares?” Joxer called the names knowing it was in vain. He especially didn’t want to believe the War God capable of hurting another God to this extent, least of all his nephew, but he couldn’t disbelieve it either. Ares had a foul temper and Joxer had often winced to hear of how he’d taken it out on the hapless Strife. 

 

He waited; hoping one would appear “Discord? Aphrodite, Cupid? Anyone?” His voice cracked slightly and shook his head knowing that none would heed his call. Maybe they didn’t consider Strifes fate important enough, he knew they had issues and most of the Olympians hated Strife for something he hadn’t done but he’d at least thought his mother would come for her son. 

 

//You promised//

 

*No one cares?* Strifes consciousness jerked awake though his body remained still, he could feel the barest hint of warmth around him; warmth and comfort. He pushed hard; fighting against the poison that tried to pull him down, not only to reverse the damage done to his organs but also now to hear and feel who had woken his mind. He was intrigued by the person and felt a sense of wild elation at the hope that maybe someone cared. 

 

He tried to use what little power he had left to sense the person but his brief fight had exhausted him. He managed to fight, to stay rigid against the pull and listened. 

 

//Remember when we first met? // 

 

The voice was soft and filled with pain yet Strife could almost see the soft wistful smile he knew the person would be wearing, he found himself held, anchored only by that voice, by Joxer. 

 

//I’d never seen a God before and you weren’t that taken by mortals. I wasn’t sure how long you’d been watching me but I hoped the grin on your face meant you weren’t going to punish me. If you’d stopped me halfway through I probably never would have done the grand finale and you probably would have never bothered with me again.// Joxer laughed somewhat shakily, //I didn’t know who you were or why you were in one of Ares Temples but I was terrified you’d call Ares, tell him what I’d done but you just looked and laughed. You got a kick out of my dad and his warlords getting what was coming to them, guess that’s why you came back next time I was in trouble. After that it seemed like I didn’t even have to cause much mischief and you’d appear. //

 

Strife drifted gently hypnotised by the sway of Joxers voice; he remembered that day well enough, he’d been bored out of his skull and dodged Discord several times already. She’d been pissed enough at him to stake out all his usual haunts but he’d known she wouldn’t bother to look in any of Ares Temples, with the mood the War God had been in at the time she wouldn’t have dared. 

 

He’d snuck around one of the Temples expecting to find snivelling worshippers and arrogant warlords. What he hadn’t expected to find was the fragile looking boy that had been systematically crushing small pink berries and casually tipping the juice into wine caskets. He’d watched the young child crush berries and add them until his lap was empty. Strife remembered wondering how the child had known (at such a young age) what those berries could do but the excellent laxative effect they’d had at Ares’s feast that evening combined with the ease at which the child hid all evidence of his crime had given Strife one of the largest mischief bursts he’d had in a while. Something like that was only topped by the morning when he’d seen Joxer carry up a flagon of wine to settle his fathers belly, complete with extra berry juice. 

 

That brief encounter had caught Strife’s interest enough to keep tabs on the child who seemed throughout his life to be a natural mischief-maker; even in adulthood he was a big magnet for trouble and able to cause havoc and mayhem wherever he went. Some was intentional, just like the berries; others like his natural ability to trip people over were not. Strife wholeheartedly encouraged the child by teaching him better and more cunning ways of hiding his crimes and appearing before Joxer every so often to exchange stories and ideas. Some was accidental caused by his clumsiness and ability to go off on strange tangents when observing something or speaking to someone but Strife had always made sure each little accident involved the other person falling into something nasty.

 

Despite being dedicated and worshipping Ares Joxer had always given Strife energy and power, no matter how small the act or how repetitive. Even when he decided to become a hero Joxer never lost the ability to cause mischief and chaos and so Strife had kept up the appearances and started a tentative friendship between them as they both sat on the sidelines and watched Xena and Ares, often critiquing their fighting skills. 

 

//I couldn’t even tell you when we became friends but you were// Joxer seemed to mumble and Strife strained to hear// You were my best friend and I let you down//

 

Strife could feel the Hinds blood infecting his own and attacking with renewed gusto, his powers were weakening, unable to hold the poison at bay. Strife frantically fought against it as Joxers voice grew fainter; he tried desperately to find his anchor. 

 

//They may not have thought you a great mischief God but you were to me. // 

 

Strife strained harder fighting with all his strength

 

//And you were a great friend, I only wish I could have been the same//

 

Strife fumed against it all, against Ares, that bitch Callisto, the Gods, demigods, mortals- all of them for destroying his body and his friend. He heard the sorrow in Joxers voice and vibrated with fury at the self-loathing his friend was feeling. 

 

//Maybe if I’d come clean I could have been here with you//

 

*I never would have let you get caught up in it* Strife shivered slightly as he felt the undertow begin again, he fought to feel Joxers arms around him, to hear his voice and he screamed with every fibre of his being to live. The idea came to him in an instant, so radical and amazing he had to pause. His body was gone; useless and poisoned and the Hinds blood was trying to destroy the rest of him but if he stopped fighting and gathered the last of his power to him maybe he still had enough to fight one last time to return to his friend, to the one person who cared and would miss him. 

 

Strife wanted to live, not for vengeance but because he deserved to. Joxer believed in him, he’d even miss him. He had a new purpose now; to live for himself and for his friend, for both their sanity’s, for both of them to survive. Strife clenched and pulled everything towards him he could possibly reach. Ever part of him, ever power he possessed. He pushed out warping himself with his power and praying to the one relative he actually still liked and respected Gaia. A flash of bright white surrounded him, throwing him off balance he screamed…

 

He lived.

 

Joxer slowly laid the body of his friend down; not seeing the dull light that encircled him briefly and settled over his belly before fading out. Numbly he carried Strifes body outside, still hoping that some divinity would come. Carefully he laid Strifes body down and set about collecting every piece of wood he could find to construct a funeral pyre. He set about his task for his friend never once aware of the God he carried within him; the tiny ball of cells within his belly, which were rapidly dividing.


	2. Allies and Breakups

Notes:Formally known as Untitled Mpreg, thanks to moved2maryland for the title and to Hallie for betaing and Jo for helping me sort out bits which flowed wrong *hugs to you all!*

 

 

Joxer frowned down at his meal; he carefully divided it up keeping all the fish bones on one side before carefully eating the flesh. Fish wasn’t his favorite food but it seemed like it was all they ate whenever the five of them got together which wasn’t very often, usually he found Xena and Gabrielle tolerated his company more then Hercules and Iolaus. Xena was the one who invited him to travel with them though Gabrielle often treated him as a joke. Neither Hercules nor Iolaus were actually rude but Hercules had made it clear that traveling together was a temporary thing and Joxer was starting to get the impression he’d worn out his welcome. 

 

 

He was even more inclined to believe it at that moment. Joxer held back a sigh, had he actually wanted to get involved in the quiet fireside discussion he would have felt left out. Xena and Hercules sat opposite him comparing weapons and talking about Ares’ latest plans for them some of which seemed too paranoid and ludicrous for Joxer to believe. Despite his current lack of affection for the God since Strife’s death, he couldn’t quite believe Ares was planning some of the things Hercules was convinced he was involved in. 

 

Joxer was attempting to look immersed in his dinner whilst listening to the conversations around him; unsurprisingly no one noticed that he was listening to them. He’d caught enough comments to know Iolaus was speaking about his side in the battle against Callisto, so he turned away from that conversation and tried to avoid Gabrielle’s various snorts and snide comments. He didn’t know much about it himself but he didn’t want to hear yet again how Strife had had his arse kicked (Iolaus’ words) and been brutally murdered (Joxers words). 

 

Iolaus sat next to Joxer, his back turned towards him as he spoke animatedly to Gabrielle who eagerly scribbled down notes intent on writing the story of Iolaus’ trip back in time. Joxer noticed he left out anything related to Gabrielle’s daughter, Hope, and skirted around the issue easily. He glanced briefly towards Hercules and Xena; the demigods were deep in discussion as Hercules recounted Ares’ latest attack on them. 

 

“So unfortunately I can speak to pigs so I’ve gone off eating them,” Hercules looked slightly embarrassed as Xena sniggered “But at least Discord’s a chicken now.” The hero barely managed to hide a smirk, “unfortunately though something tells me Ares won’t be cooking her up for dinner.” 

 

Xena laughed “Oh I’d love to have been there to see that, I can’t believe Ares made Iolaus and Auto into a monster!” she laughed again. “I can’t believe it, it just doesn’t seem like something he would do, it’s hilarious.”

 

Joxer smiled slightly; he agreed with Xena, it didn’t seem like something Ares or even Discord would think up, it sounded more like something Strife would have thought up. Though he didn’t dare presume to know how the Gods thought, he could judge from their actions and what he’d been told by Strife. Ares’ plan to get at Hercules was more worthy of Strife then Ares, the whole chaotic event just screamed mischief. His smile turned slightly sad as he thought how his friend would have reveled in the mayhem; had he been around.

 

He felt bile rise slightly in the back of his throat as his stomach clenched, he forced it back down his throat and inhaled shakily. It was odd that the worst week when he felt life was falling apart would be the week he actually felt the best. He’d woken up every morning feeling terrifically healthy though depressed and had barely tripped over anything all week; in fact Joxer was sure his co-ordination was improving and any bruises he did get for walking into things faded in record time. 

 

His eyes fixed on the flames of the fire and he swallowed hard, ashamed that he had almost enjoyed listening to Hercules chatter especially when it involved the Gods he no longer worshipped or cared for. He clenched his fists slightly; he’d removed himself from his dedication to Ares the night that Strife died. The night he stopped being in awe of the War God and started disregarding him and most of the other Gods.

 

He still ached to be a hero and to make something of himself, but the feeling was hampered by the deep anger and bitterness that he felt towards the God that he’d once worshipped. Joxer had waited till long after nightfall to light Strife’s funeral Pyre and yet still no other Gods had arrived to claim Strife’s body. He’d even tried praying to ones other then Ares; he tried Discord despite being sure she’d maim him, Cupid and even Aphrodite. No one had come to claim his friend, not his mother or a God whom Joxer believed was his friend’s ex-lover. 

 

*Some family* Joxer thought slightly bitterly as he set his fish bones to one side and drew his knees up to his chin *Being kicked when you’re down isn’t much fun but at least my family paid that bit of attention to me*. Strife hadn’t talked much about his family but Joxer had got the impression, mainly from his comments and defensive humour, that they weren’t the kind of people you turned you back on. 

 

Joxer knew Aphrodite deeply despised Strife, he’d once seen her ignore the other God when face to face and then make derisive comments before she left. He was almost completely sure that the time she'd caught Strife chatting to him under the guise of giving him grief for being Xena's friend was the reason she’d chosen to mess around with his personality and make him feel like a fool, even now he hated the sound of a bell ringing and got a slightly paranoid feeling whenever one did. Strife had shaken off Aphrodite’s words with a nasty comment and a giggle that had had the love Goddess flouncing away in anger, but Joxer had seen an undercurrent of pain underneath it all. He hadn’t pressed Strife on the matter; he may have been a fool at time but he wasn’t suicidal and he wasn’t stupid enough to think his friend was completely on the side of sanity. He knew Strife lived by ‘blast now, think later’ and much as he’d assured Joxer that if that happened he’d get him back from Hades, Joxer wasn’t inclined to risk it. All he’d got were a few murmured explanations of “Cupid, mistake and all hate me,” which didn’t make all that much sense to him. 

 

He hugged himself tighter, unconsciously protecting what remained of Strife. The faintly glowing wall of tissue that now encircled the tiny ball inside him; it still divided as it attached itself to Joxer through thin, wispy tendrils of light. 

 

Joxer stared into the flames and closed his eyes briefly remembering the deep orange glow that had surrounded Strife’s body before it burnt to ashes. He swallowed hard and choked back a sob as he remembered the look of fear on his friends face, Joxer had been sickened by that look and the questions that went with it; why Strife had been killed in the first place, why could anything kill a God and why no one cared.

 

He bit the inside of his lip; the fact that the first two questions were harder to answer disgusted him, he understood that Strife wasn’t well liked by most mortals and unlike most of the other Gods was only actively worshipped in shrines rather then the large temples. The God of mischief had admitted to him that most of his mischief energy came from young children. In fact, he should have had energy from adult mischief’s like adultery and manipulation, however, Discord considered them her domain and had made sure that from a very young age Strife didn’t get anything she considered her power. As a result very few people actually worshipped him and he had to make his own mischief most of the time or at least actively encourage it. 

 

Joxer closed his eyes again not realizing how long he’d been silent; he kept staring into the flames that hauntingly reminded him of Strife. He still couldn’t believe he’d been the only to actually give a damn about the God, he’d waited as long as possible and then cremated Strife. Joxer knew that once word got round every sales person in Greece and anyone who’d hated him would be after a piece of the fallen God. He didn’t want that happening to his friend even if all that was left of him was a broken empty shell. Joxer had waited till the former God was nothing but ash and the flames had burnt out; he’d scoped up the ashes not caring if they had cooled enough to hold and had put them inside his helmet. Then he’d made the two-day journey to his friends’ nearest shrine and scattered the ashes as he mumbled a prayer for the fallen God. 

 

He’d left his helmet and armor behind at the shrine along with his dedication to Ares, no longer did Joxer consider himself Joxer the mighty wannabe hero trying to impress Ares, now he considered himself just Joxer. He still doubted he could become a hero, at least one in the same league as Hercules or Xena but he’d vowed never to help the Gods not matter how small the problem or how dire. Joxer had to set out for Abdera after he’d made sure Strife’s ashes were scattered and ignored the shrines to Ares along the way. When he’d had come across Iolaus and Hercules a few days later he’d decided to join them and had been slightly more enthusiastic when he’d found out they were meeting Xena and Gabrielle. He’d been forced to listen to Iolaus recount the battles with Callisto until he was ready to throttle the hunter, luckily Hercules had seen the usually eager look in Joxer’s eyes turn to something far less pleasant and he’d hastily stepped in and changed the subject. Joxer winced hearing Gabrielle’s shrill voice cut into his thought; she sounded almost delighted at the mere idea that he theories were true.

 

“So Gods can die then? I knew it.”

 

Joxer turned to look at her and frowned as he noticed the smug look on her face “What a surprise when the going gets tough the Gods run off,” she sneered as she looked at Iolaus who (to his credit) looked more then a little annoyed. 

 

“Ares was scared.” Iolaus spoke flatly “I’m not defending him but wouldn’t you be if the situation was reversed? I didn’t even realize anything could kill a God. Didn’t you feel the ground shake where you were? Didn’t you just know something terrible had happened?” He raised his hands and sighed before dropping them to his lap. “Ares wasn’t exactly broken up but he certainly wasn’t happy that she’d killed Strife.”

 

Joxer noticed both Xena and Hercules now had their full attention on the hunter as he spoke, he could see neither looked upset at the mention of Strife’s death, which he expected both of them having fought him or been a victim of one of his ‘games’, but both did seem troubled by his death. 

 

Gabrielle shook her head at Iolaus a slight patronizing smile on her face as she spoke, “he was probably upset his little lackey wouldn’t be there to do his dirty work for him.”

 

Joxer held his breath and counted silently to ten as he tried not to lose his temper; she wasn’t saying anything he didn’t believe himself, he figured Ares had only selfish reasons for being upset at Strife’s death. Joxer clenched his fists. The God probably viewed it as a minor irritation and inconvenience that would get him into trouble with Zeus.

 

“It’s not like Strife ever actually did anything like the other Gods anyway, he didn’t exactly matter did he?” Gabrielle didn’t seem to know where to shut up, even Hercules eyebrows shot up at her next comment, “I mean, God of Mischief? Not exactly a useful one was he?”

 

Joxer felt his nails dig into his palms as he tried counting again, anger was swelling inside of him at her words. He was fighting to keep his temper at bay. He noticed Iolaus shift slightly to look at him but ignored the frown on his face as he kept counting past thirty. Even Hercules was starting to look disgusted by Gabrielle’s comments. 

 

“I don’t see how anyone could defend any of them but Strife, he was nothing but a jumped up little freak.” Gabrielle sighed unable to see what the problem was; they were down one enemy and severe annoyance. “It’s not like anyone misses him” she added snidely “You said Ares just dumped his body where he was killed; I bet none of them bothered to claim it.” 

 

“Shut up.” Joxer spoke softly as he felt the fury curl into a fist at the bottom of his stomach. The idea of his friend’s body being left till this day with no one but Grave robbers to abuse it sickened him, he was eternally glad he’d given him a Warrior’s funeral and left nothing but ashes. He tried to tune out her voice as the mere mention of Ares infuriated him further, he knew he should be more furious with Discord but he’d always tried to convince himself that Ares cared for Strife in his own way. *I wanted to believe he could actually care for someone other then himself.* He thought, feeling guilty at thinking of his own feelings rather then defending his friend. He locked eyes with Gabrielle and listened to her rant never once breaking eye contact, “I said shut up Gabrielle.”

 

Iolaus knew when to move and when not too and the look on Joxer’s face told him they’d be fireworks. He quickly got up and moved next to Hercules ignoring the look the demigod gave him; he at least wasn’t going to underestimate Joxer’s temper.

 

Gabrielle blinked a look of stupidity crossing her face at Joxer’s words. She couldn’t understand why the man who professed to adore and dote on her (often to the point of nausea in her opinion) was being rude to her. She moved closer to him ignoring the warning signs and dug him in the ribs with her elbow. 

 

“Please, you know I’m right” she laughed scornfully something that instantly put Joxer’s back up “If he was that important and they missed him they would have got Hades to bring him back.”

 

Joxer felt her body next to his and stiffened. Her body was literally throbbing and he could feel her body heat seep through to his making him angrier. He felt the knot of Fury inside him explode and stood up, towering over her and interrupting her mid explanation. 

 

“Don’t ever speak like that about Strife again.” He glowered down at her and she shrunk back slightly seeing the pure ferocity on his face as he spoke; she didn’t even dare open her mouth only squeaked in reply. 

 

“I mean it Gabrielle; you are never ever to talk of him like that again. In fact don’t even mention him at all and never mock him or who he was. He may not have been the best God and done the greatest things or been worshipped far and wide like the others but he was still a God; and my friend.” He kept his voice steady refusing to lower it “If you don’t like any of that, too bad, I won’t sit here and listen to you bad mouth him.”

 

He was shaking now, barely able to hold on to his rage. Part of him wanted to strike out and he held back never one to deliberately hurt someone, the other part wanted to burst into tears and was rapidly winning.

 

Ironically Hercules saved the day. 

 

“Just think how many people would miss you if the situation was reversed.” The demigod spoke softly as he glanced from Joxer to Gabrielle “Now think how it must feel to have no one who would. I didn’t like Strife anymore then you Gabrielle but I’ll be the first to admit that his death was wrong.” He locked eyes with Joxer and “I won’t condone anyone who will miss him but I don’t support them either.”

 

Joxer nodded and swallowed back the tears. He didn’t have the strength to argue anymore and despite Hercules parting shot he was glad the demigod had defended him, and Strife. He noticed Hercules’s eyes on him as the demigod put out the fire, Joxer could clearly read the disappointment in them and he avoided looking at Hercules unable to deal with more confrontation.

 

Iolaus avoided Joxer’s eyes and lay down silently, though Joxer wasn’t sure if he was annoyed by his revelations he could tell Iolaus was at least uneasy and he guessed that he and Hercules would set off as quickly as possible in the morning. He doubted they would want him to join them and he wasn’t sure he could deal with more grief anyway; despite Hercules word he was sure by the time morning came around he’d be ready to add his own opinion and make his disappointment clear. 

 

“Let’s get some sleep.” Joxer felt Xena's hand squeeze his shoulder and when he glanced into her eyes he saw understanding there. He knew she wouldn’t have agreed with his friendship with the Strife but she didn’t say anything against it and for that he was grateful. He wasn’t sure he could cope with her rejection too. 

 

He watched as she dragged the now spluttering Gabrielle as far away from Joxer as possible and forced her to lie down lying between the two, making it clear to Gabrielle the conversation was over. 

 

Joxer lay down quickly, his legs shaky after the fight. He wrapped his arms around himself and tried to calm himself down. His heart still beat fast and he felt on edgy and wide awake but he hoped that after a nights sleep the next day would be easier to get through. As he lay on his side, he realized one thing; for the first time he’d actually admitted Strife was his friend even at the risk of his loosing his other friends. He swallowed hard and closed his eyes wishing he’d been brave enough to do so when the God was alive.

 

 

Invisible to the eyes of Gods and mortals alike the Goddess Asyinnitos watched the mortal known as Joxer as he attempted to sleep. His body was tense from the arguments and the adjustments required to house the zygotic god inside him. She could see that sleep would not be easy. Unable to whisper to the soul inside him which hadn’t awakened yet from its slumber she settled for running a hand over Joxer’s body, using her powers to drain the tension from him taking it into herself. 

 

She watched him tremble slightly under her touch before slipping into a light sleep just outside of Morpheous’ range. The painfully shy Goddess of Pregnancy and the Unborn smiled to herself, happy that Gaia had entrusted her to watch over Joxer and Strife hiding them from the eyes of the other Gods. Asyinnitos was more then just a minor God and often worked with Hera to ensure pregnancies went as smoothly as Fates intended but she was rarely seen on Olympus. If she attended festivals and coronations she always remained in the background and was overlooked. She doubted any of the Gods aside from Hera; her sister and mother could actually recognize her and knew what she did. Most of her time was spent invisible to mortals’ eyes; she would soothe and calm unborn babies, lulling them into sleep and encouraging them to grow and be strong.

 

Like Strife, she had very few shrines and no temples but gained power through those she watched over. Even though few would know her name their thanks for safe pregnancies fuelled her, she would be a formidable goddess to go up against despite her shyness. Her fierce protectiveness was normally saved only for those she watched over now not only extended to her gestating cousin Strife but to his mortal friend who carried him within. 

 

Asyinnitos smiled slightly as she felt another Goddess flash in behind her, the only other being also charged by Gaia with keeping the two safe. She turned slightly to take the hand of Joxer’s other protector, Adrasteia the Goddess of Divine Retribution, her mother. She placed a kiss on Joxer’s head and pressed her fingers lightly to his belly and murmured “Be safe, little one” before she allowed her mother to flash them away.


	3. Realisations

Notes: Thanks Jo, you're a star

 

Cupid stared down at his pouting son who stared back up at him, baby Bliss; who was almost a miniature copy of his father, screwed up his face and fisted his eyes as he cried. Cupid sighed; Bliss was becoming more and more difficult at night and during the day which was putting even more of a strain on the fragile bond between Psyche and himself. Deep down Cupid knew the worries and increasing rift between himself and Psyche was reflecting back onto Bliss. The baby was just acting out in the confusing changing emotions. 

 

He scooped up his whining son and walked up and down the nursery with him, jiggling him gently in his arms. He tried to tune out Bliss’s unhappy cries knowing that he was in part responsible for them. Cupid had been more then slightly inattentive recently preferring to immerse himself in his work then face the troubles at home. He stroked Bliss’s back gently, carefully avoiding his wings, the action seemed to soothe the Godling slightly and Cupid looked down into Bliss’s tearstreaked face “It’s okay, daddy’s not going anywhere. Go to sleep.” He murmured softly to him. He kept up his slow pacing and continued stroking Bliss’s back, the baby slightly soothed and calmed pressed his head against Cupids neck and clung onto him tightly as he tried to nuzzle deeper.

 

Cupid wasn’t sure why things had changed, why everything had gone so wrong but he knew when it had happened; just after he’d felt Strifes death. He’d felt the hot burning pain lance through him, he’d dropped to his knees just before Olympus shook and shuddered. Aphrodite had clutched her head also feeling the terrifyingly odd feeling. Cupid had clung to her, the same way he used to when he was a Godling, as the dreadful certainty swept through him as it did every other God and Goddess. That a God had died. *Not just anyone either, Strife* Cupid thought as he clutched Bliss a little too tightly and the baby whimpered in response; Cupid relaxed his hold and Bliss quieted as he slowly drifted into a troubled sleep.

 

Cupid continued to pace, not just to make sure his son was asleep and settled for the night but also to avoid the talk with Psyche; the talk that had been building for the last month. Cupid had been to everyone he could think of for advice finally settling to disregard his mother’s pleas to stick with it and try to ignore it and go with his Hephaestus’ advice instead. The older God had listened patiently to Cupid before suggesting that whilst they try and work things out maybe they should admit what they truly felt. The Fire God had told it wasn’t worth ignoring your own feelings and playing along, not only were both Bliss and Psyche already sensing the problems but Cupid would grow to resent them if he tried to play along. Aphrodite had been furious at Hephaestus' suggestion and Cupids decision. She had tried her best to convince him over dinner and some very odd tasting drinks. Cupid frowned remembering the sweet aftertaste, a familiar one he could almost identify, and it was almost on the tip of his tongue…

 

He stopped pacing and slowly walked over the arm of arranged cushions which served as Bliss’s bed. Since the third month Bliss had taken to flashing himself out of his basket and onto cushions on the nursery floor and after many repeats of putting him back in the basket they had opted for making a swarm of cushions for him to sleep on. The cushions came complete with spells, courtesy of Hecate, to stop Bliss rolling about. Cupid gently set his son down and tucked the blankets around him; he smiled wondering how his son could look so innocent and cherub-like when only an hour before he’d been screaming and refusing to sleep. Cupid took a deep breath knowing that it was now or never and glanced towards the door, he had to tell Psyche the truth, that he didn’t love her anymore. He wasn’t sure how he could have loved her so passionately and intensely in the first place, though she was extremely beautiful and had a heart to match she wasn’t his type at all. He swallowed hard and looked down at his son, Cupid was glad they had been together because he got Bliss out of their marriage but he was still confused why he fell in love with Psyche. It felt like his brain had been almost clouded and he’d been living in a dream world for the last two years, now that world was slowly crumbling and everything was starting to come back. Cupid was starting to remember the heartache he’d felt before Psyche, the heartache caused by Psyche. Cupid shook his head and rubbed his temple, which was why he couldn’t understand it how could he have loved someone he’d once intensely hated? He didn’t hate her anymore but he didn’t love her either and everytime he looked at her instead of seeing the woman he’d been so madly in love with all he saw was Strife. 

 

Cupid clenched his fists, trying not to mimic one of his ex-lovers patented insane giggles. It was more then completely screwed up; it was more then just chaos! He stood up and watched Bliss roll over and hug the pillows, the baby whimpered slightly in his sleep and Cupid walked out of the nursery not wanting Bliss to pick up on his confused emotions as he snapped his fingers and shut the nursery door he briefly slumped against it. How could he have fallen so passionately for Psyche when he’d been so heartbroken over Strife? Cupid grimaced as a remnant of feeling crossed his chest; he couldn’t remember the heartache properly it was almost as though it had been ripped from him but he’d been getting twinges, fleeting feelings which jogged his memory. He couldn’t feel what he knew he should be feeling, what he desperately wanted to feel; the pain and heartache at his ex-lover’s death. Cupid clenched his fists; he should feel something other then fleeting twinges. He and Strife had been friends for nearly a hundred years and lovers for well over fifty before the whole ‘Psyche mess’ happened. They’d been closer then two people could ever be; soulmates they’d both believed. He and Strife had had so many plans, they’d wanted to get married, start a family; not a night went by when the two hadn’t been in each others arms, whether it was making love or for comfort. 

 

Cupid clenched his fists harder and slammed the, into the wall, he didn’t understand why he felt nothing when he remembered their times together it was almost like he was detached from it, he didn’t even feel grief for Strifes death though he desperately wanted to. At the very least he should feel the anger and heartache he’d felt at Strifes betrayal, he should remember the pain he felt when Hera announced one of her priestesses was carrying a demigod fathered by Strife and the fury he’d felt when his lover had vehemently denied the claims that the baby was his. He remembered volley upon volley of fireballs he’d blasted at Strife as the mischief god had lied to him, begging and pleading for Cupid to believe him. The mischief God had never once tried to defend himself and in the end Ares had had to drag Strife away. Cupid knew Ares had given Strife the hiding of his life for betraying his son but all Cupid had felt was anger and pain because of the betrayal from God he’d loved. The night before Hera’s news both he and Strife had decided to try for a baby of their own and yet all the time Strife had known that a mortal was already carrying his.

 

Cupid slumped back against the wall in frustration not understanding why he couldn’t feel the rage he’d once felt, he was getting angrier over that then the betrayal that had happened. Cupid remembered how he’d been a mess for years afterwards, he refused to come out of his temples except for ceremonies and refused to be anywhere near Strife, Cupid had spent practically everyday in tears and if not being sick then throwing bad temper tantrums. He’d even felt satisfaction at hearing all the Gods turned their back on the once popular God, much to Discord’s glee, although he’d been more then slightly pissed off when he heard Ares had taken the traitorous bastard back. When his emotions had started reflecting on the mortals, the other Gods had put up with it but when they affected them they’d ganged up on him and forced him to start doing his job properly and socialising.

 

Cupid snorted, forced being the right word. His Mum, Dad and two of his uncles had dragged him out of his temple, forced ambrosia and food down his throat and then proceeded to scrub him and his home clean before dumping him at his mortal temple to receive his priests and priestesses. It was only a year later that he’d fallen in love with Psyche, straight out of the blue, and realised she was the demigod Strife had fathered. Cupid frowned; he didn’t know why it hadn’t bothered him that he was sleeping with his ex-lover’s daughter. It had bothered Strife greatly, he had tried to break if off but he’d been rejected at every turn even by his own daughter and despite his pleas he’d never been allowed to go near his grandson. 

 

Cupid sighed, something was definitely wrong he needed to find out why he felt the way he did and why he didn’t feel the way he should, he kept sensing Strife though he knew the God was dead and in oblivion. He’d have to talk to his mother and get some answers, he had a suspicious feeling that he knew the answer but the idea was so horrific he tried to repress it. He strode towards his bedroom; first he had to talk to his wife.

 

*********

 

Bliss wasn’t the only one having a troubled sleep; Joxer had been tossing and turning all night, mumbling in his sleep and even whimpering. Asyinnitos placed a soothing hand on his head as she tried to draw the mortal into a deeper sleep away from the memories emanating from the embryo inside him. She couldn’t suppress the embryo Gods memories and although she knew the embryo couldn’t experience or feel them they were transmitting loud and clear into Joxer’s unconscious. From Strife’s death backwards, Joxer was experiencing snippets of the mischief Gods old life, some of which Asyinnitos was sure wouldn’t be pleasant especially those involving Discord. One thing Asyinnitos was glad of was the rising feelings of fury rising in the mortal. Though his waking mind didn’t realize it, subconsciously he was projecting the need to protect Strife, which the embryo was picking up on and reveling in. 

 

Asyinnitos gently pressed her ear against Joxers stomach, she whispered to the tiny God to sleep, exerting her power over it in combination with that which Gaia had given her to protect Strife and Joxer. Her eyes widened as she caught the end of Joxer’s dream and she pushed into the memories, careful not to upset Strife she didn’t push too far back, and saw what he had been through in the last few months. The pain and rejection from the other Gods, the abandonment he’d felt from Ares and his Mothers constant gibes and taunts. Asyinnitos rubbed Joxer’s belly gently as she whispered to calm the now agitated Strife to sleep. Her eyes filled with tears at the memories she’d seen and she knew she’d barely scratched the surface, the gods distress was firmly rooted in his childhood something the embryo was too tiny to remember just yet. Asyinnitos was unaware of the depth of the fury emanating from her until she felt the light touch of Adrasteia on her shoulder. She turned and for the first time in decades allowed her mother to take her into her arms as if she were a Godling again. She used her powers to transfer the brief knowledge she’d gathered from Strife’s mind and Adrasteia almost staggered under the weight of the anger flowing from her daughter. As mother and daughter stared at each other Adrasteia saw in her eldest daughter more of herself then she ever had before.

 

Asyinnitos looked her directly in the eye “Do you know how hard I had to work just to keep Strife alive when Discord was carrying him?” her voice was soft and deadly calm as she spoke “She tried trick after trick to get rid of him and I had to keep using my powers to force her to eat ambrosia. She went on the battlefield when she was eight months pregnant, I think if it hadn’t of been for the baby Ares would have blasted her to Tartarus for that, the close calls she had.” The Goddess shook her head speaking more in a minute then she had in the last few months “when he was born I lost my protection on him and I couldn’t help him. I wish I’d stood my ground and made more of a fuss before he was born, maybe if they’d taken him away then he would have had a better time of it.” 

 

In her eyes a fury deeper them both the Godhoods of her mother and sister shone brightly and as she spoke Adrasteia felt a chill run through her realizing her eldest was using her godly powers to curse.

 

“From this moment on Discord will never conceive of another child nor raise one” Asyinnitos spoke quietly but her power was reflected in her voice “and all those who wronged Strife shall be denied the privilege of bearing children until the consequences of their actions are seen and they truly realize what they’ve done.”

 

Adrasteia shivered slightly as her daughter’s curse passed though her rendering herself and most of the Gods on Olympus barren and infertile. Her body screamed to reject the curse and remove it but she merely nodded accepting Asyinnitos’ decision.

 

Asyinnitos bit her lip, grinding her teeth over it as she felt the curse spreading even through herself “I forgot about him until he became a father, at least one of sorts,” She sighed “and then when his grandson was conceived I focussed more on the children and tried not to think about what must have happened to him.” 

 

Adrasteia wasn’t sure what to say to help her daughters’ guilt anymore then she could help her own. Many a time she’d heard the Godling Strife call out for revenge on his mother but she’d written his pleas off as a normal child’s tantrum, even without seeing that far back she was certain he’d suffered greatly as a child as well as an adult. She should have helped get to the truth of Strifes offspring instead of going with the pantheons vote and believing the worst in Strife, bringing retribution down upon him. Adrasteia herself had a lot to make up for with Strife and with the rest of her family, those who needed retribution would get it Olympian politics be damned. She’d already failed the children once she wasn’t willing to do it again. Without consulting any of the other Gods involved she released the bonds she’d once helped place on Cupid and waited for all Tartarus to break lose.


	4. Memories and Mischief

Notes:In sickness and I hell borrowed words from:

 

 

“Yo Unc what’s up?” Joxer blinked, confused, as the words flowed from his mouth. He felt his own mouth settle into a smirk as he strode into the simple white temple. A bright flash lit up the room and a feeling of nervousness and dread settled over him. As the flash died down he stared up at Ares scowling face and his heart sank, Joxer tried to bite back the babble that flew from his lips but his body moved of it own accord. “Yeh sorry about ta day it just would have been bad ya know. It’s not like I missed tha thing on purpose an I bet Cupe was glad not ta have me there.” Joxer grimaced inwardly as he felt his heart twist at the mention of Cupids name but the smirk remained fixed on his face. 

 

Ares fist was a blur of red as it shot out hitting him straight in the chest and Joxer felt himself fly backwards almost in slow motion. His eyes were fixed on Ares and he saw disgust briefly in them before the God turned away as Joxer crashed into the stone pillar behind him. He kept the forced smirk on his face even as his body shuddered at the flare of pain across his back. Joxer resigned himself to dealing with the bruises as the thought, bizarrely, crossed his mind that the only person who’d actually patch him up was busy down in Greece trying to introduce his newest method of healing. *I hope he doesn’t rough me up too much, still rather him then Discord* the thought crossed his mind confusing Joxer even more. He didn’t understand why he was being thrown around by Ares anymore than why he was worrying about Discord roughing him up; it was true he’d probably be terrified if he ever met the Goddess but he’d never worried about it when he’d been friends with Strife. 

 

*Speak of the harpy* the thought echoed snidely in his mind as a slightly more muted flash lit up next to him. Joxer felt a hysterical giggle pass his lips as he stared up into Discords face. She leant over him, sneered and sashayed away moving closer to Ares then Joxer would have liked. He inclined his head slightly and froze; technically his mind did anyway, as he stared into the polished reflective surface of a shield. His body pulled itself up despite the stabbing pain that ran through it, dusted itself off and sauntered over to Discord and Ares. Joxer’s mind was still locked on the image in the shield; instead of his normal cheerful average looks (his own words) he had seen the sharper paler features of Strife. He tried to scream “What in Hades is going on?” but as his mouth opened all that came out was, “Hey ma, long time no see.”

 

Joxer could feel conflicting emotions coming from Strife as he looked from Ares to Discord. As he looked at Ares he felt respect and a deep desire to please; he felt a need to make Ares proud along with a comfortable feeling of security and safety which Joxer found extremely ironic considering his visit to the pillar all of five minutes ago. When Joxer turned Discord he felt Strifes emotions become chaotic and twisted; he hated his mother and yet desperately wanted her at the same time; he was terrified of her but enjoyed baiting her and making her life miserable whenever he could even though he seemed to grudgingly respect her work. 

 

Joxer tried again to speak but nothing came out; his gaze was fixed on Discord and as he looked at her he felt his body force itself not to involuntarily tremble. Discord must have noticed a tremble no matter how slight and Joxer felt Strife’s heart sink as the Goddess smiled, it wasn’t a very nice smile it was the kind of smile that made mortals piss themselves.

 

“Shame you missed the ceremony today Strife, you know presenting a new God to the pantheon is a big thing. Zeus wont be pleased you didn’t attend.” The light in her eyes told Joxer how much she’d love to see him, Strife, punished for it. He felt something inside Strife die little by little as she spoke, her words like poisonous barbs despite their ‘sweetness’, “and the baby was so cute you know. All blue eyes, blonde hair and smiles. Oh and wings too you know, he looks just like Cupid did when he was a baby. Can’t see any of his mother in him but that’s probably for the best. Just as well he looks so much like Cupid isn’t it? He wouldn’t want any other unpleasant reminders coming out in the newest generation.”

 

Joxer felt himself swallow hard and his fists clench involuntarily as he watched Discord laugh. A bright light pierced his vision which made him blink and he heard cold words echo in his mind displacing the laughter briefly *You will never see him, never Strife. You’re nothing to them. * Joxer saw Ares on the edge of his vision blasting Discord into the wall and he let out a mental cheer as the bright light spread out encompassing everything. Joxer felt hands on his shoulders and he hit out wildly. He felt relief flood him as he felt his body move to slap away the intruding hands. He heard a squeal and felt a sudden rush hit his body as tiny pinpricks of cold covered it. 

 

Joxer sat up gasping and rubbed at his eyes as he spat out the remnants of the ice cold water that had soaked through his clothes. As his vision cleared he stared up at Xena, a very unimpressed Xena who was holding a water carrier and sporting a slight bruise on her shoulder. Joxers eyes went wide and realizing the implications of this he stood up quickly babbling in apology. 

 

Xena’s face cracked a slight smile as Joxer raced over the apology and he felt relief settle over him as she spoke “Apology accepted Joxer, I won’t try to wake you again.” Xena frowned and looked at him “You know you’ve been having a lot of nightmares recently, kicking about and moaning but you always seem to settle straight after them and not wake up,” she shrugged “You must have been fighting someone though, I wasn’t expecting the punch but I should have been able to stop it. You must be practicing.” She turned away before he could correct her and walked over to the light fire scratching her head violently.

 

“Oh God it itches!” he heard the moan before he saw Gabrielle limp into the clearing trying to scratch her foot as she walked. She hopped over to Joxer then flopped down next to him on Xena's bedroll holding her foot up for his inspection even as her eyes stared at Xena in accusation "Foot rot!"

 

Xena rolled her eyes “Gabrielle I told you, if you didn’t listen…” she didn’t have time to finish before Gabrielle was off griping again “Foot rot Xena! From those disgusting swamps you made us wade through,” her eyes almost glowed in anger and Joxer edged away slightly. On the whole Gabrielle only got that upset one day out of the month and that was the day all of them had their ‘alone time’.

 

Xena looked more amused then annoyed though Joxer noticed her scratch her head vigorously again “I warned you Gabrielle, I said…” 

 

“And what in Zeus is this?” Gabrielle voice rose to new octaves as she jumped up staring down at Xena's bedroll, “Lice! You’ve got lice Xena?”

 

Joxer somehow managed to fight back a laugh as the normal unflappable warrior princess almost shoved Gabrielle out of the way to examine her bedroll; "I have not got lice. You think I wouldn't know if I had lice?” she scowled at Gabrielle who was now alternating between itching her foot and head “I don’t think so,” she stomped off back to the fire mumbling the word “lice” under her breath as she tried to get the fire going properly. Gabrielle had resorted to hopping as she stared at Xena's bedroll.

 

Joxer resisted the urge to scratch his own head; with all the gracefulness he could muster in the early morning light and with a full bladder, sprang up out of his own bedroll not wanting the irritating insects near him. He swayed slightly feeling momentarily lightheaded and almost tripped over. He heard Gabrielle’s laughter as he righted himself and smiled ruefully; his clumsiness had been a long time coming so he wasn’t surprised she was making the most of its comic value. It had been well over four weeks since his balance and coordination had improved and Joxer had found himself becoming less and less prone to falling over. Recently it seemed the own time he did was when Gabrielle was near and he’d either fallen on her or knocked her over in the process. 

 

“Same old Joxer,” Gabrielle smirked at him as he pottered past her and Xena on his way to the river. Joxer felt a slightly popping in his abdomen and frowned pausing on his way, after a few minutes without any unpleasant side effects he shrugged and walked down the slope to the water, he burst into laughter as his ears caught Gabrielle’s voice which was becoming fainter at each step “By the Gods it’s spreading, Xena look this things spreading all over!”

 

Still laughing quietly to himself, Joxer quickly stripped off and laid his clothes by the waters edge checking them briefly for lice. He couldn’t help but smile at the slight sounds of argument coming from the camp; He didn’t like to see anyone fight but Gabrielle had been becoming almost unbearable recently in her not so subtle attempts to find out more about his friendship with Strife and insult the God. The words ‘shut up’ worked only so often and he could see Xena becoming more and more short tempered as the days went on, for the sake of their friendship well his and Xena's anyway, Joxer had decided to part company with them once they reached the next village. He choked back at laugh at Xena's ‘Scabrielle’ comments and focussed on himself, ignoring the sniping of the other two.

 

Joxer shivered slightly as he stepped into the cold water, the sun had not had enough time to heat it. He took a few steps in and gasped as the cold tingle settled over his privates, not waiting for the water to lap higher he ducked down and shot up gasping as the too-refreshing feeling. Joxer stepped out a little further and started bobbing in the water, letting it soak up to his neck now. He’d been so hot recently and now his body was becoming used to the water he was feeling a lot better for it. His only real discomfort was a throbbing feeling in his nipples, they’d been tingling on and off for the last week but now they were throbbing violently. He touched them and hissed; it wasn’t quite pain but they were very tender his eyes widened as he looked down at them; Not only were his nipples a lot larger then normal but they were covered in small white bumps, Joxer prodded a bump experimentally and groaned as the burning feeling hit him. He cupped his pectoral as the pain passed and stared in fascination at the pale bluish lines around his nipples, they spread out like a fan making his pec more raised then normal, almost swollen. It didn’t look abnormal but it gave the impression Joxer did a lot of training and exercise. If it wasn’t for the lines and lumps he wouldn’t have minded the look, and the pain too of course. 

 

Joxer washed his chest carefully before tending to the rest of his body; a blush started in his cheeks and almost instantly ran down his body as he realized his nipple explorations had caused his cock to go half hard. Without thought his hand instantly moved to it and he wrapped his fingers around the shaft stroking softly, as the other hand swept down lower and cupped his balls he realized how sensitive they were and bit back a moan gently massaging them. Closing his eyes he blocked the sounds around him and focussed on the strong sensations running through his body. Joxer licked his dry lips keeping up a steady stroke; his hand moved off his balls and almost hesitantly stroked his swollen nipples. It wasn’t quite pleasure or pain but it made him more aroused then ever; Joxer shuddered slightly, his cock jumping at the feeling,. He whimpered as he pumped his cock faster and ran his nails gently over his nipple, his back arched and his mind slipped into one of his favorite fantasies. Joxer’s fantasy lover was caressing his body gently, teasing him into frenzy as he kissed up and down. His dream lover sucked and teased Joxers nipples with his tongue and the mortal rubbed harder and faster on them. His dream lover took Joxers cock; he taunted the mortal by bathing it with his tongue before he took it fully into his mouth, sucking hard and encouraging the mortal to thrust into his mouth. Joxers hand pumped herder and he thrust into time to the thrusts in his fantasy. He felt a hot flush swell from within and his body shuddered, arching his back Joxer didn’t manage to bite off a cry as he came, his fantasy lovers name slipping from his lips, “Ares!”

 

The instant the name slipped from his lips Joxer collapsed back into the water panting hard. Red faced and sweaty he opened his eyes and was fervently glad that both Xena and Gabrielle were arguing too loudly to hear him. A second after his relief came the guilt and Joxer closed his eyes in shame as he realized he’d just fantasized about one of the people who’d hurt Strife the most. The fantasy wasn’t anything new unlike the sensations from his body but he let the guilt wash over him as he bobbed in the water glad there was no evidence of his ‘crime’. Ares was the one person Strife actually had seemed, both in Joxer’s dream and in reality, to look up to and believe in. The abandonment and pain his friend had to have felt when Ares left him must have been overwhelming. Joxer bit his lip and swallowed hard, he’d left his worship of Ares for a reason for Strife and he’d be damned if he’d ever allow himself to indulge like that again and defile his friend’s memory. Joxer swore to himself that he’d put his own feelings for the War God aside and focus back on the ones he’d felt for Strife, over the injustice at his friends death and mourning. 

 

His decision made he stepped out of the water and stood in the morning sun for a few minutes letting it dry him, Joxer slowly began to pull on his trousers and tunic and was just reaching for his shoes when he heard Gabrielle’s shriek, it wasn’t a ‘I’m furious with Xena’ shriek it was more of a ‘we’re being attacked!’ shriek. Reacting on instinct and with no thought of the potential danger that could lie ahead Joxer raced back up the slope, he ignored the rocks cutting into his feet and burst into the clearing…and froze.

 

Xena was slowly making her way to her feet in a daze of confusion as she rubbed her head at the pain and Gabrielle was pinned against a tree, a muscular arm holding her in place as she tried to wriggle free. Although their attackers back was to him Joxer would have recognized the wings anywhere, he stepped forward cautiously and asked “Cupid?” the only response he got was Gabrielle’s gasp of pain as Cupid tightened his hold around her neck. Joxer moved closer not wanting to rush the God, he never imagined Cupid to be a violent God but he wasn’t going to chance startling him and getting Gabrielle’s neck broken “Cupid, put her down!” His voice was soft yet had a note of command in it that even Joxer had never heard before.

 

He wasn’t entirely surprised when Cupid dropped Gabrielle to the floor as if she were a rag doll. He glanced at her, her eyes were a little fuzzy and she was gasping but she seemed all right. Xena had now righted herself fully and seemed back in control, despite her itches she was poised to attack or defend as Cupid turned to face Joxer. 

 

Joxer stared at the God; though Cupid had never been one of his favorite Gods he felt pity at the sight of the God before him. Cupid looked like he’d been to Tartarus, for punishment, and back. The God was shaking violently his body experienced severe tremors, small sparks were spitting from his hands and his body was sagging under his own weight. As Joxer stared up at Cupids face he saw sweat pouring off the God, the pain and sorrow radiating off him was obvious for anyone to see even without the miserly reflected in Cupids face. He felt fear grip him as he locked eyes with Cupid and the God’s eyes locked back into focus, on Joxer. Joxer could see Cupid was acting on instinct more then anything and now that the Gods eyes were on him Joxer took a step back, trying to put himself out of the line of fire. He saw a hunger more primal then anything ever seen he’d ever seen before light up Cupid’s eyes as they began to glow a bright emerald green, the glow encompassing the Gods body as he lunged for Joxer.


	5. Green eyed monster

  
Author's notes: Notes: Part of Series based on plot bunny on mpreg archive, plus a big thanks Jo! *hugs*  


* * *

Joxer wasn't a fool; he knew Cupid was far stronger then he was and any resistance or defiance would lead to a lot of pain. He didn't brace himself for Cupids attack or hold his ground, instead as the God's body began to glow the same emerald green as his eyes Joxer dived to one side to avoid him. Unfortunately as Joxer dived Xena tossed her chakram at Cupid. It was only a warning shot which should have whistled past the God's head and struck the trees just past him but ended up heading straight for Joxer. The mortal barely had the time to register the chakram heading for his face before the green glow clouded his vision temporarily blinding him for an instant. Joxer staggered back, blinking away the spots in front of his eyes he heard a strange squishing noise that rooted him to the spot and a terrifyingly unearthly screech that set his teeth on edge. 

 

Before Joxer's vision could clear he was hit him hard from the front with enough force to knock the wind out of him. Before he could fall to the ground strong hands encircled him and held him close, he felt his stomach lunch as his feet left the ground. Joxer blinked back black spots and clung to the arms around him, he could hear Xena screaming his name but the sound was becoming fainter and fainter as wind whistled harshly in his ear, Joxer's stomach lurched and he tried desperately not to be sick as the realisation dawned on him that he was flying. Or more specifically Cupid had to be flying and carrying him. Joxer was unwilling to let go of the deathgrip he now had on Cupid but his vision was blurry so he rubbed his eyes quickly against his arm when it cleared he blinked a few times and looked up expecting to see Cupid holding him; instantly he froze. Joxer stared up at the green scaly face of the monster and let out a cry as he wriggled; panicking in the God's grip "Let me go, let me go!" He knew the green monster had to be Cupid (having heard a few tales from Strife) but he couldn't see anything of the God in the monster. In his desperation Joxer forgot they were in flight and struck out at the creature. It stiffened at the blow, letting out a cry then dropping slightly as Joxers hand caught its eyes and almost dropped the mortal. Terrified, Joxer stared down at the dizzying green below him; despite wanting to get away self-preservation kicked in and Joxer gripped the monster around the neck trying not to slip as it rubbed its wounded eyes. 

 

Hanging like a limpet around the monster's neck Joxer wrapped his legs around its body and looked up fearfully into its face. It hissed at him in anger its eyes slightly bruised than it completely contradicted itself by wrapping it's arms protectively around the man as it beat it's powerful wings *flying us to Zeus only knows where* Joxer thought as he stared up at the creature. Something nagged at him, the monster; Cupid, the green glow and Joxer frowned as he stared into the creature's eyes. They didn't look the same but they seemed the same, it felt the same. He wasn't sure that even made sense but everything screamed at him that the green monster was Cupid; he still clung on tightly despite the arms around him and asked cautiously "Cupid?"

 

The green eyes glanced down at him for an instant and then flicked back up. Joxer kept quiet he could see grin determination in the monsters- in Cupid's face. He didn't know why the God had turned into such a creature though he had heard rumours that Cupid had a dark side; something to do with Psyche and Hercules as far as he could remember. Joxer just hadn't expected the normally handsome Love God's dark side to be so ugly; he also couldn't see what 'Cupid's dark side' as he dubbed the monster, wanted with him or what it had been doing at their camp. Joxer had expected to see Ares with his hands wrapped around Gabrielle's throat one day but he'd never expected Cupid to be one to attack her, especially as the woman was almost always nauseatingly flattering to Cupid in all her writings. Joxer glanced down as he felt Cupid slow and start to descend, instinctively he gripped him tighter. The stomach lurching dips weren't helping his nausea any and watching the ground rapidly coming towards him just increased the problem. Joxer knew one thing; he really really hated flying. He clenched his teeth along with rest of his body as he felt the jarring jolt as Cupid landed. 

 

Opening his eyes warily Joxer looked around; he'd expected a much harsher landing then that especially considering the hostile looks Cupid seemed to be giving him; he blinked and peered behind Cupid at the huge elegant building surrounding them. The monster form of the love God kept Joxer firmly held in his arms as, despite Joxer's renewed struggles; he carefully carried him across the Temple floor. As the mortal tried to pull away Cupid hissed and tightened his grip making Joxer dry-heave as his stomach twisted violently in protest. Joxer glowered at the monstrous face above him but stopped struggling; he was in no hurry to be squeezed again though a part of him briefly entertained the idea of vomiting all over the God if he tried it again. 

 

Cupid dumped Joxer unceremoniously on a pile of blankets on the floor, which knocked the wind out of him again; he rolled onto his side fighting the remaining nausea from his 'flight' and glowered at Cupid. Joxer watched as the green monster glowed brightly before fading into the Love God; as the glow cleared Joxer sat up scathing remarks at the ready until he saw Cupids face. Joxer paused unable to looks away; it was like walking past a battle whether you jumped in or not you had to have a look and once you saw the horror in front of you, you were unable to look away. Never before had Joxer seen such abject misery and bitterness on anyone's face especially not Gods. His breath caught in his throat cutting off the questions that immediately came to his mind and he had to (ashamedly) push back the spiteful thought that came to his mind *I hope Cupid's finally feeling something about Strifes death*

 

"You look like death," Joxer spoke flatly finally hitting on a neutral comment; he managed to ignore the slightly less neutral ones as he looked at the God. He wasn't surprised when Cupid turned towards him but he was shocked to see the tears building in Cupid's eyes, tears the God seemed barely able to hold back as he wrestled between heartache and fury. "What's happened Cupid, are you all right?" Joxer wasn't quick enough to stop the words from coming out but he couldn't berate himself over them; although he knew Cupid had hurt Strife greatly it didn't stop him feeling pity for the love God. Even if Cupid had put Strife through hell Joxer was unable to hate him; he felt only compassion for him. 

 

Cupid looked away and breathed deeply concentrating on grounding himself and his emotions; the last thing he wanted was another reappearance of the creature inside him and to feel the brief insanity he'd felt before he got to Xena's camp.

 

Cupid had wanted to know the truth about himself, Psyche and Strife; he had tried to stay calm to try to twist the answers he so badly needed out of Aphrodite but she'd started pleading and pouting at him as she tried to take his mind off the questions he had. Cupid had felt a cold brittle feeling spread across his lower body and his mother had gasped in pain he hands on her own abdomen. For a brief instant their eyes had locked and he had seen confusion and anger in her eyes as it dawned on him that they'd been cursed. Before he'd had time to see who would dare curse another God, especially not two powerful love ones, he'd felt something snap inside, then it had been as if a dam had broken, releasing a torrent of pain, heartache and rage. Cupid had barely even been able sort out one emotion from other; the pain had almost crippled him. He neither heard Aphrodite's shrieks and screams nor felt her race to pick him up as he collapsed. His fury had brought out the worst in him, much more so then the pain he'd felt. Everything had begun to make sense and fall into place; his Mother's teatime drinks, his lack of feeling for Strife, his far too obsessive love for Psyche that rapidly faded after Strife's death... and then it had overwhelmed him. 

 

Cupid didn't remember much he had been reacting on instinct, his brain overloaded by suppressed emotion; he had been looking for Strife, desperately searching for his former lover and soulmate. Cupid had torn through Olympus leaving devastation in his wake; Aphrodite's temple had exploded around them and the others nearest to it had been shattered and broken from the fallout. He'd wrecked Ares temple in a fit of fury when he couldn't find any remnants of Strife, even his room had been bricked over and he'd almost torn Discord apart when she'd started screaming at him about a curse. Finally he'd descended to Tartarus and terrified the dead in his insane search, his Uncle had tried to stop him once but after almost being eviscerated had finally resorted to shouting at Cupid through a shield of his power. Hades hadn't wanted to hurt his young nephew and had guessed what Cupid was after. Pleased that finally someone was interested in Strife other then Ares, Hades had unhappily blasted Cupid from behind his shield and told the God what he wanted to know. That Strife wasn't in Tartarus or the Underworld at all and that he (Hades) hadn't seen his dead nephew or even felt him near. Hades had sadly had to conclude that the Hind blood had condemned Strife to oblivion.

 

Cupid hadn't taken the news well; in fact Tartarus now looked almost as wrecked as Olympus. Without Strife Cupid would quickly have become so unstable the God would have in all likelihood destroyed himself, condemning his soul to the oblivion that had tried to claim his exlover. But Strife was being reborn inside Joxer; his signature was weak and slightly altered but it was enough to draw Cupids attention. Cupid had flashed to Xena's camp feeling a tiny surge that he'd recognised as Strife's mischief. He hadn't said a word to Xena of Gabrielle just looked around for him lover, part of him unable to accept that he was gone. Lost in his emotion and need Cupid unknowingly repeated Strife's name over and over as he stared around the camp. Only Gabrielle's scathing comment on "the useless mischief God" had permeated his brain and he'd reacted rather then acted. Cupid had slammed Xena out of the way and thrown Gabrielle against a tree, one hand had gripped her neck and he'd started to squeeze not comprehending that she was only mortal and that he was killing her. All he had seen was red; Gabrielle became the sole focus of his rage, his fury against his mother and the other Gods who had assisted her leaving Strife to die alone and Cupid to not care, the bitch who'd destroyed his lover and most of all himself. 

 

The person who'd betrayed Strife the most; Cupid knew by turning away from his lover and immersing himself in self-pity he'd turned everyone else against Strife. He should have believed his lover, trusted him enough to actually get to the bottom of the Psyche business. Cupid couldn't help the guilt and self-loathing, intensified by years of repression. Somehow Joxer's words had drawn his attention away, had stopped Cupid from throttling Gabrielle. Cupid wasn't sure what had done it but as he'd focussed on the mortal he'd felt an unmistakable bond on him, Strifes bond. 

 

The feeling had intensified as Cupid had stepped closer and though he had seen Joxer, Cupid had felt Strife. In feeling that, an incredible sense of fury and jealousy had swept through him, Cupid hadn't even felt the change from God to monster as he stared at Joxer. Joxer wearing Strifes weak signature could only mean one of two things to his emotion-fried brain; that either the mortal was Strife's child which Cupid knew couldn't be true as Joxer was one of triplets and neither of his brothers carried Strife's signature or that Joxer had been Strife's lover. As the last thought had struck him Cupid had lunged for Joxer, intent of ripping the man apart. Registering Xena's chakram heading for the mortal Cupid had been overcome by an extreme need to protect Joxer and had leapt in front of it letting the weapon hit him. His need to protect Joxer had intensified as he'd held the man and instantly Cupid had spread his wings and flown away, still carrying him. 

 

Cupid rubbed his head and turned to look at the mortal, he felt a strange hysterical desire to laugh bitterly at the concern on Joxer's face. If Joxer had realised what Cupid was like the love God knew he'd never have seen that sympathetic look. Unbeknownst to him Joxer had a pretty good idea of the hardships Strife had had to endure because of Cupid, the love God would have been shocked and confused to discover it didn't stop Joxer's compassion. 

 

"Cupid, are you alright?" Joxer repeated himself growing more apprehensive by the minute, he felt a small measure of relief as Cupid turned to him "You don't look to well and you are acting really strange. Maybe you should call one of the other Gods?" he asked hopefully. Though he'd turned his back on them maybe they would take Cupid away and let him find his way back to Xena. Joxer jumped as Cupid let out a harsh laugh.

 

"Who should I get Joxer?" Cupid laughed again "My Mom who in her infinitely stupid wisdom thinks I can't take care of myself and I should do what she thinks is best. Who even goes so far as to stop me feeling what I want to feel, who thinks she has the right to take away who I want to love and hurt over!" The last part was shouted at the ceiling and Joxer flinched as the words echoed around the temple. "Or how about my Dad, the great God of War who's more comfortable in battle then actually helping people through things. Who took back the one person who hurt me the most and saw him as more of a son then he ever saw me!" Cupid didn't stop the tears from escaping as they trickled down his cheeks. 

 

"Or how about the rest of my wonderful family? Who helped make sure I never got a second chance with Strife? Who put spell after spell on me to get me to fall in love with his own daughter, Psyche! Just to rub things in a little bit more." Cupid ran his hands over his face and through his hair "to make me forget I even cared about him so when he.... When he..." he tried to get the words out but his mouth failed him. 

 

Joxer stared at the miserable God and his heart went out to him, at least in part. He truly felt sorry for Cupid; he doubted Strife did cheat on Cupid and father Psyche but he guessed someone must have tricked the Gods into believing he did. Or else someone must have forced Strife to sire Psyche on the woman without his consent and knowledge. Cupid was a mess, literally and emotionally the God could barely stand up straight under the weight of his returned emotions. It explained a lot to Joxer although there were more then a few gaps for him to fill in; at least now he understood why some of the other Gods seemed to hate Strife so much though Joxer wasn't sure where Ares (who'd taken Strife back after it) and Discord (who rallied against her own son) fitted in to everything. 

 

Joxer rubbed his head; he was glad his nausea had faded but the overload of information was beginning to give him a headache. He stared at Cupid who was trapped in his self-loathing and felt a surge of irritation. Joxer felt sorry for Cupid and what had been done to him; Joxer knew what the other Gods had done was akin to rape but whilst he knew it had to be massively traumatic for Cupid to be suddenly get his repressed emotions back Joxer couldn't help but feel angry at the God. Cupid wasn't as guilty as some of the other Gods especially Aphrodite but Joxer felt he did have his part to play in it. He wasn't sure why he felt so strongly about Cupid, the anger that was slowly rising inside him was almost as if it was he (Joxer) had been the one to be betrayed by the Gods. Joxer took a few deep breaths ignoring Cupids rambling and bitter laments as he tried to fight down the fury; not knowing why the emotion was so intense was freaking him out. 

 

Finally Joxer couldn't take it any longer his head ached and he felt like he had joined Cupid on the wild emotion ride "Could you please just shut up!" the words came out a little harsher then Joxer had intended and he winced at the resulting silence around him. His eyes focussed on Cupids and he saw pure shock there. Cupid was more dumbfounded that Joxer had even spoke to him in such a tone then he was at the words themselves but as the words slowly sunk in Joxer saw anger begin to creep into Cupid's eyes. His heart plummeted as he realised he'd directed the God's anger onto himself but as Cupids eyes narrowed on him Joxer stood up. He stood by what he thought; despite what Cupid was going through and had gone through he had to snap out of it. If anyone could get the Mischief God brought back from the dead it was Cupid; the God definitely had the connections.

 

"Stop feeling sorry for yourself and do something about it." Joxer's eyes narrowed "So the other Gods have treated you like manure? What do you think they do to us all the time?" Joxer could feel himself getting worked up as he spoke but he couldn't stop the words tumbling out, he couldn't help the bitterness that seeped into his voice "You regret Strifes death? Fine, go and get him back and tell him yourself. Why complain to me about it? In fact why bring me here at all?" 

 

Cupid stared at Joxer more in confusion then anything else. It was as if the mortal had a deathwish. It was bad enough that Joxer was standing in front of him feeling like Strife but now he was talking back at Cupid, telling Cupid to sort himself out? What right did Joxer even have to speak to him like that? He felt the fury rush over him again and he glared at Joxer, his hands clenching and unclenching as he lunged at the mortal determined to teach him a lesson and work off some of his anger. 

 

Through some amazing feat and using some unknown skill Joxer managed to throw himself to one side, rolling onto his stomach. He easily evaded Cupids first lunge but the God turned, fury on his face and even more determined to teach Joxer a lesson then before. As Cupid lunged again Joxer rolled onto his back and scrambled to get up; this time he wasn't fast enough and Cupid caught him a glancing blow on his shoulder which spun him back onto the blankets. Joxer forced himself to sit back up and grimaced clutching his arm; the look on Cupids face was frightening, it was as if the God wasn't even paying attention anymore he was just beating on the first thing he could, Joxer. The man felt a keen sympathy for Strife as he realised that this was how his friend must have lived most of his life, maybe not with Cupid but with Discord at the least. Pushing himself back as far as possible Joxer's hands crossed over his belly unconsciously protecting the life within as Cupid reached for him; in the instant before the God grabbed him it briefly crossed Joxers mind that Cupid was very much like his father. 

 

Cupid was too far-gone to force himself to stop; it had stopped being about 'punishing' Joxer, thrashing him to within an inch of his life, it was now about payback. He was paying back everyone for what they'd done, what they'd taken from him. Cupid didn't even see Joxer cringing before him anymore or feel Strife's signature all he saw was red. He reached down to grab Joxer and as his hands connected with the mortal's arms Cupid felt white hot shocking pain lance up them into his head. He screamed and let go of Joxer letting the mortal roll to one side as Cupid dropped to his knees clutching his head. 

 

Joxer looked up at Cupid; his hands still clutched over his belly he watched as a silvery glow appeared in front of the downed God. The glow quickly formed into what appeared (from the back) to be a very petite Goddess in a simple white toga. Joxer couldn't see the expression on her face but as Cupid managed to look up, Joxer watched bewilderment cross Cupid's face right before the Goddess lifted a hand and propelled him back slamming him into the far wall with her power. 

 

Joxer tried to sit up but the Goddess turned to him with a noise of distress; she moved quickly to Joxer's side and pushed him firmly back down, her fingers dancing over Joxers head and abdomen an extreme look of concentration on her face. Joxer thought it better not to argue; he lay passively while she checked him over, his eyes darted to Cupid who was groggily sitting up and he jumped slightly in worry. 

 

"Shh, it's okay. Relax Joxer," The soft voice of the Goddess instructed him; something about her voice seemed familiar and Joxer instantly calmed, still watching Cupid. The earlier flare of fear gone, replaced by the certainty the Goddess would protect him. He wasn't sure whom she was or what she was checking for but she'd protected him from Cupid, sent the love God flying, something that seemed almost amazing when he looked at her. The Goddess looked no older then late teens, though Joxer knew they could appear much much younger then they truly were, the Goddess had a strange softness about her as though she herself was very young. Her dark brown hair was curled and pinned so it was half up, half over her shoulders, she had no weapons on her and her toga was very modest and simple, it showed just enough flesh to intrigue you. Not that Joxer was in any position to be intrigued. He couldn't help but smile though at her happy exclamation although he did find it very bizarre when she kissed his stomach. 

 

"Who are you?" Cupid spoke the words, still slightly dazed, the tiny Goddess packed one hell of a power punch and although she was unmistakably Olympian he couldn't remember seeing her before. She'd knocked him across the room and almost unconscious with one blow. She'd also briefly distracted him from his rage that he was more then grateful for, it was quickly dawning on him how badly he'd lost himself in the moment. Had he managed to grab Joxer he could have accidentally killed him. Cupid was rewarded by a scowl from the Goddess, her eyes flashing in protective fury.

 

Asyinnitos was having difficulty keeping her temper in check; she'd spent the last few hours having to explain her actions to Hera who unsurprisingly wasn't happy. Though Hera wasn't cursed herself she was severely irate that Asyinnitos had gone above her and cursed half the Pantheon, Hera hadn't been able to see Asyinnitos' reasoning and the younger Goddess had found herself embroiled in a furious shouting match with Hera. Asyinnitos had got so carried away she'd only realized Joxer was being attacked when she felt Foetus-Strife obliviously use his powers to defend himself and Joxer from Cupid. Without a word to Hera she'd flashed straight to Joxer; she hadn't needed to read the mortals mind, Cupid had obviously been subjected to Strife's defense and was whining on the floor whilst Joxer was curled on his side, unknowingly protecting Strife. She'd lashed out, instantly and without holding back; she'd thrown Cupid as hard and far as she could before reaching to check on Joxer and Strife. Thankfully Joxer had only a bruised arm and Strife was more then adequately protected. 

 

Asyinnitos looked up at Cupid; not surprised he didn't recognize her. Despite sitting on the ground she made no effort to get up but merely glared at him in ire and disappointment. "I expected better of you, Cupid," she spoke softly and he quailed under her gaze, even his Mother and Hera couldn't make him feel as guilty as the young Goddess was. He bit his tongue and squatted down next to them, he made no effort to touch Joxer sure by the look in the Goddess eye he'd be sorry if he did. 

 

"Is he okay?"

 

Asyinnitos glanced at him and spoke sharply "His arms bruised but that will pass, you could have done more damage then you realize. You could also ask him yourself." She raised an eyebrow at the Love God appearing cool and collected though her heart was racing. With the exception of a few Gods she'd barely said two words to the others since their time in the womb.

 

Joxer was silently rooting for the Goddess over Cupid but when the God spoke he could see sincere regret and embarrassment in Cupids eyes as he spoke "Sorry Joxer," the words came easily to him making Joxer believe he was indeed genuine. Joxer couldn't quite brush it off with 'never mind then' but he did offer Cupid an answering nod that mollified the God slightly. 

 

Asyinnitos kept her hand protectively on Joxer silently challenging Cupid if he was to think of trying again but the look he gave her placated her. The young God was embarrassed and slightly horrified by what he had done, what he could have done. Her gaze softened slightly though her body language made it clear she would protect Joxer if Cupid tried again. Asyinnitos saw the pain in Cupid's eyes and she felt herself soften even more; the God was miserable and in obvious deep turmoil and whilst she knew Cupid had his part to play in what had happened to Strife but he was by no means the truly guilty person. That was reserved for the older Gods, the ones meant to protect and guide the Godlings through their mistakes who should have helped Cupid and Strife not alienated them from each other, the ones meant to continue her own job once the babies left their wombs and for the God responsible for Psyche. Asyinnitos knew Strife wouldn't have strayed from Cupid which meant one way or another someone else was responsible; Asyinnitos had shared enough with him whilst he was still in the womb to know that Strife had a wicked sense of humor and a nature akin to his Godhood but he had a good soul. She knew that intimately having spent so much time keeping him alive with her own power, whispering to him to grow and be nourished. 

 

Asyinnitos laid a hand on Cupids arm; he was no more responsible then anyone else yet underneath all his rage was a deep guilt that he was the one to blame. She felt slightly saddened by it; Cupid had demonstrated very emotional behavior even before he was born but he'd always been compassionate, often picking up on his Mother's moods and reacting with his powers. The empathy and compassion he had displayed then was at the root of his problems now and ironically only his wife had the best Godhood to help work through it. The only other thing she could do was to calm him as best she could, unfortunately the older the God got the less well her powers worked on the, and whilst she would have no problem in calming Bliss it was harder to do so with Cupid. Still the time she spent with Godly babies was greater then with any others and whether he recognized her consciously or not he did allow her to calm him.

 

Asyinnitos smiled, she watched as Cupid relaxed under her touch. She had a soft spot for all those she'd taken care of before birth especially the Godly babies, she smiled again wondering how Cupid would react if he knew she thought of him as a 'baby' especially as she was only a few hundred years older then him. 

 

Joxer made a slightly noise and blushed as both Cupid and the Goddess looked at him "I'm sorry I'm just a bit uncomfortable." He blushed deeper and shifted slightly "Um not to be rude I know you're obviously a Goddess but who are you?" he asked Asyinnitos; he didn't recognize her and if Cupid didn't recognize her he wasn't sure what was going on. 

 

Asyinnitos smiled slightly and patted his stomach lightly sensing the foetus within Joxer stir "I am Asyinnitos, Joxer, Goddess of Pregnancy and the Unborn." She saw the flash of confusion that clouded his face and her fingers gently caressed his stomach. The gasp behind her told her everything she needed to know and she looked at Cupid who seemed to be caught between turmoil and hope. She smirked slightly at the young God enjoying his confusion, he was too young to put it all together but the idea had occurred to him. "Cupid I want you to protect Joxer," she lifted her chin and focussed on his eyes neither confirming nor denying what Cupid thought "Put your own feelings aside and vent them in private but when I can't keep my eye on Joxer I want you to be able too. I have the feeling this may be more therapeutic for you than my curse will be."

 

She smiled at the startled look in his eyes "My curse, yes, designed to punish those which failed before," a look of sadness momentarily crossed her face as her hand passed over her own belly "all those who failed before."

 

Joxer frowned; shifting onto his side he watched the two. Cupid seemed torn between desperate hope and deep self-loathing but Asyinnitos to be having a promising affect on him. The God no longer had the wild desperate look of someone on the edge, now he seemed more focused though Joxer wasn't sure why they were talking about protecting him. There was no reason for him to need protection, he wasn't important enough for the Gods to worry about. As if catching his thought Asyinnitos turned back to him "I know this is hard for you to understand Joxer and I will explain it to you in time but I have to find somewhere safe for you, somewhere we can take you and protect you. I can shield him until then but I need you to watch over him." She addressed Cupid now "Can you imagine if Discord found out?" her tone suggested she already knew the answer and Joxer watched Cupid turn pale. Joxer was growing more confused by the minute but something about the Goddess told him she had his best interests at heart. Asyinnitos looked thoughtful for a moment, "You can get your second chance later Cupid but for now I need you to help me by checking him every now and again I also want you to go back to Olympus and confront those you need to. For your own sake and Joxer's; he doesn't need a turbulent guardian even if it isn't all the time and you need to sort yourself out. Get the answers you need, all the answers." She sighed "My curse is now in full affect; they'll be a lot of problems up there and a lot of chaos. Just the right thing to keep peoples minds off what's going on down here don't you think?"

 

Cupid glanced at her sharply her meaning becoming crystal clear. He had to admit he needed to sort things out on Olympus though now he was loathe leaving Joxer's side especially after what he had almost done; it didn't bear thinking of. If Asyinnitos hadn't got there in time Cupid could have killed Joxer and Strife, the guilt weighed heavy on Cupids mind but the idea that Strife was alive if not yet kicking filled him with hope, something he had to keep to himself until there was no option but to reveal. He had to admit he was impressed by Asyinnitos plans but he felt pity for Joxer; the man obviously didn't understand what was going on but unwittingly had given them all a second chance, Strife included. He just hoped the idea didn't bowl him over too much; mortals were such fragile things.


	6. Malapropisms and Mischief

  
Author's notes: Thanks for betaing Jo, you are a star!  


* * *

Joxer tried to ignore the loud debate behind him and concentrated on getting to the tavern; he was sick and tired of listening to the high minded opinions of Hercules and Gabrielle. Nether one of them seemed to actually have anything good to say they both just wanted to be right and currently both of them were wrong. They were both 'discussing' Cupid's actions the week before; Gabrielle's version of events was rapidly becoming more and more embellished; not only did Cupid attempt to throttle her but now he also flung her around and growled in her face before 'borrowing' Joxer for an hour of so and bringing him back. Gabrielle had also forgotten to mention that she'd antagonized the God by making a rude comment about his murdered cousin; she was too interested in portraying herself as the innocent martyr- something even Hercules wasn't falling for. Apparently despite his dislike for the Gods he was Cupids favourite Uncle and was trying to defend said nephew by insisting another God a.k.a. Ares had to be behind it. With Iolaus as the useless voice of reason they were getting nowhere fast, in fact all Joxer was getting was a headache. He rubbed his head and let out a low groan as Iolaus interjected another comment in the hopes of getting the two to stop arguing, not only did he start with "Before I start speaking, I'd like to say something" but he just aggravated the two by explaining how since Cupid was Ares son both of them could be right. 

 

Xena offered Joxer a sympathetic look from her perch atop Argo but didn't offer to switch places apparently the arguing was wearing thin on her nerves too. Joxer just wished they could get onto another topic; not only was he worried his headache was rapidly becoming a migraine but he wanted some time to collect his own thoughts and reflect on the confusing time with Cupid the week before, not to mention the strange dreams he was still getting. 

 

Joxer had had seven strange dreams so far and in all of them he'd seen himself as Strife. It was like he was starring in a play of his friend's life- a very unpleasant play. In the first dream he'd been fireballed by Ares and upset by Discord who had made some digs about a newborn Godling whom Joxer had to guess was Bliss (that in itself confused him even more). In another dream Aphrodite had given the Mischief God several threats about curses and rendered him impotent (something Strife had been more embarrassed about then upset). A dream that had had him waking up in a cold sweat at the intensity of Strifes bitterness and hurt was one where Cupid had ignored him and paraded a young woman in front of him who Joxer had learned was Psyche. The latest few dreams seemed even odder; various Gods and Goddesses, some Joxer only recognized from statues had treated Strife as if he was some kind of criminal, they seemed to detest him and made it clear he was nothing to them. Joxer sighed, he was getting far too little sleep to have to listen to the stupidity behind him, and he wanted nothing more then to curl up in a little ball somewhere quiet and get some peace. 

 

But he couldn't; both Asyinnitos and Cupid had made it clear he had to stick with his friends and though Joxer wasn't sure why he listened to them, he had. He felt a hot flush come over him and he loosened his tunic wishing for the unteemth time that Hercules would get a life. 

 

Xena leant down to him, holding tightly to the saddle and as if guessing his thoughts whispered conspiratorially "He's a legend in his own mind." Joxer shook his head slightly wondering if he heard right as she went slightly pink "I didn't mean that to come out like that." The Warrior Princess straightened up in the saddle and looked ahead an expression on her face that made Joxer wonder if she was torn between laughing and being embarrassed.

 

Joxer suppressed a smile and kept walking glad for the brief distraction and no way inclined to argue with her "You always cease to amaze me Xena." He blinked at her sideways glance and blushed slightly "I mean you never, erm, never mind" he blushed deeper and concentrated on the road ahead not aware of the mischievous wakened Godling inside him. 

 

**********

 

Asyinnitos rubbed her temples tiredly as she surveyed the grim faces around her, Hera, Zeus, Ares with Bliss asleep in his lap, Anteros trying to soothe a tearful Psyche- the list went on. Any and every God directly related or associated to Cupid aside from her was present preparing for an intervention. Cupid was acting a little too true to form; he was dutifully taking the attention from the mortal world to stop anyone from recognizing Strife's power signature inside Joxer but in doing so he was causing chaos and stopping Asyinnitos from checking up on Joxer as much as she would like. Currently most of the Gods had barricaded themselves inside their temples in an attempt to ride out the problems on Olympus and Aphrodite had hidden herself in Hephaestus forge, currently unscathed by Cupid's rampage. 

 

"You need to lift the curse." Asyinnitos started out of her daydream and looked towards her scowling Uncle, "No" she answered simply with a shake of her head ignoring the anger in his eyes. She would be a fool not to be at least slightly frightened of him as he was King of the God's but he had no power over her and couldn't make her change her mind. It didn't hurt that she knew Zeus was scared of her mother; just before Asyinnitos was born the King of the Gods had learned the hard way that you don't order your hormonal pregnant sister to reveal the father of her baby.

 

"Now Asyinnitos," Zeus ordered pompously sitting upright as if trying to tower over them all. It was slightly laughable as in the position she was in Hera appeared the taller one. Asyinnitos suppressed a smile at the action but the idea of speaking in front of everyone terrified her. Most of the Gods in the room she barely knew and only Hera really knew her. With no option, Asyinnitos swallowed hard and shook her head again focussing on what she was protecting to give her the strength to win the argument. "No the curse stays. If most of you in this room are rendered barren or impotent," she dared look her Uncle in the eye despite paling at his furious look "then you need to reflect on why that is, until you make amends the curse remains." She looked around the small gathering; the only ones not scowling or glaring at her were Ares, Bliss and Hera. Hera looked smug as she glanced sideways at Zeus, focussed more on him then the issue of Cupid, Bliss was asleep and Ares looked.... contemplative. Asyinnitos wasn't sure if that meant she could expect a dagger in her back soon or if he agreed with her. 

 

On some level he had to agree with her, as their eyes locked the War God spoke "This is something that affects all of us but it's not as important as Cupid we should stop focussing on it and think of a way to help Cupid before I muck it all up'" he shot a glance at Anteros no doubt quoting the sheepish Godling "And tie him down till he see's sense." He shoots a look at Zeus that clearly translates as 'start thinking with your brain' and eases the tension slightly and everyone tries to avoid smiling.

 

Asyinnitos smiled slightly at Ares glad to have backup, though she was confused why. Even the War God was not exempt from her curse, Ares had his own issues with his treatment of Strife. She had heard rumors that Ares had seemed 'abnormally despondent' (according to Athena) over Strifes death but she'd assumed from his actions in the aftermath, that the Goddess had exaggerated. Asyinnitos herself held her own shame over Strifes treatment and the claiming of his body but at least she was innocent of trying to continue as though she had no contrition.

 

Feeling a slight tingle along her link to Joxer Asyinnitos frowned and tried to concentrate on the mortal, something was going on, something strange. She started and glanced at Zeus, in her attempt to find what was wrong with Joxer she'd mentally tuned out the entire conversation and she had no clue what had been said. *Zeus wants to know if your curse had anything to do with your mother releasing the bonds on Cupid* Ares resigned voiced echoed in her mind and she blinked coloring slightly as she spoke aloud. "Maybe. Not really," she blushed deeper as she contradicted herself; she was having trouble concentrating having to multitask between checking on Joxer (and the extremely active Strife) and answering the questions. "The answer is very complicating," she blinked trying to clear her head as her face went from pink too scarlet at her own mistake. "I mean no, it didn't. She chose to do it, we should have addressed what happened between Strife and Cupid sooner instead of disbelieving one of our own children and turning our backs on him." Blocking out her link with Joxer, she lost the dark pink allure and spoke calmly drawing strength from the knowledge she was right. She wished she could get Gaia involved but the powerful Goddess was still far too angry to want to face the other Gods yet. "When Psyche was conceived Strife insisted he'd never been unfaithful yet we chose to believe that he had rather then look to see if he was telling the truth. Oh I know that there is no doubt that she is his but we have no idea if he fathered her or if he fathered her without his own knowledge." She focussed mainly on Ares as she spoke seeing an agreement in his eyes, and more surprisingly for her, no shock at the suggestion. Clearly he'd had the same thoughts at some point though she was unsure why he hadn't acted on them. There was a flurry of denials and indignant comments from the other Gods, which she ignored, her eyes boring into Ares'.

 

 

"I've often wondered so myself," the War God admitted stroking his beard and checking that the winged cherub in his arms was still asleep "That's one of the reasons I took Strife back, that and he's like a son to me." His brief sweep of the congregation waylaid any comments at his words and he continued "but that's not even up for discussion yet. We need to find an outlet for Cupid's grief, whether we remake those bonds that I'm guessing won't happen." Ares glanced at Asyinnitos as she nodded "Or we just wait for him to calm down and then help him." He rolled his eyes "For an intervention we are getting nowhere fast."

 

Asyinnitos could see acquiescence on both Zeus and Hera's faces, both looked more thoughtful then she remembered seeing them before but she guessed being by your own children was enough to humble anyone. Sensing a sudden flurry of activity pushing at her link with Joxer Asyinnitos focussed on it and seeing what trouble the mortal was in, quickly stood up and made her excuses "Problem pregnancy, mother needs help. Cupid...we should try to help but we have to remember Thebes wasn't burned in a day." She groaned mentally at her words and flashed out before the smirking War God could comment.

 

*********

 

"It's just wrong." Joxer groaned trying to block out the strident tones of Gabrielle who was checking through her scrolls, he wasn't sure what was wrong but the scowl on the woman's face told him she wasn't pleased. He was just glad she wasn't scowling at him, poor Xena was catching it now. The Warrior princess couldn't get a word in edgeways; not that it appeared she was trying too, Joxer was almost completely sure Xena had tuned out before they even entered the Tavern. Gabrielle shook the scrolls in Xena's face and Joxer had to admire the woman's restraint. Joxer figured himself partly to blame, he never should have wished for them to loosen up especially as now Hercules and Gabrielle were both drunk and not very nice drunks at that. They'd passed the 'I love you' stage almost an hour ago and now both were trying to get their opinions across by shouting and (in Hercules case) glaring people into submission. Joxer couldn't understand it; he could see neither Hercules nor Gabrielle had had more then a tankard full of the rich ale. Whilst Xena had claimed it was strong Joxer knew both of them had consumed much more before and been less inebriated; Iolaus and Xena also had ale and had drunk two glasses each but they were both still sober so Joxer couldn't work out why the other two were so hammered.

 

Joxer was drinking goats milk since the smell of the alcohol now made him sick to his stomach he was a little embarrassed about it but had been more annoyed then such when Hercules had decided to challenge him on it leaving Joxer feeling like a child and wishing Hercules would feel humiliated. Unbeknownst to him the tiny foetus of Strife picked up on his two wishes and unconsciously granted them; had Gabrielle of Hercules been paying attention and not being so high minded they would have noticed that anything they drunk from their tankard was instantly refilled. Instead of consuming less then one glass Gabrielle had drunk five, Hercules nearly nine so it was unsurprising they were intoxicated. Joxer sipped his milk feeling warmth constantly rush through him as the foetus used it powers and accidentally emitted mischief energy.

 

"Killing is mortally wrong!" Hercules bellow froze almost everyone in the tavern except Gabrielle who giggled maniacally. "One day everyone will see that and no one will believe in the Gods" an expression of distaste cross Hercules face as someone hidden at the back (and making a quick exit) shouted at him "Blasphemer!" The demigod stood up thumping the wooden table and cracking it "Hey, I resemble that remark!" He glared around the room at the absolute silence...before the mortals all burst out laughing.

 

Hercules sat down with a thump, moodily chugging at his cup; his face was like thunder and bright red from the tips of his ears down to his chest. Joxer couldn't suppress a smile especially as Xena seemed to be almost hysterical with laughter; not caring that Hercules was embarrassed. Iolaus thumped Hercules angrily on the back,

 

"And you lectured me on drinking? " his eyes were narrowed as he sat down next to the demigod "You're drunk or is it just a fiction of my imagination?" he asked sarcastically causing Xena's giggles to increase tenfold.

 

Joxer couldn't help but join her as Hercules tried to protest his innocence. Things were rapidly descending into chaos as most of the people at the tavern seemed to be becoming more excitable then normal, he noticed even Xena had given up on keeping Gabby under control; the bard was now searching through her scrolls and quoting erotic poetry much to the poor bartenders embarrassment. As Gabrielle sprouted on about bulging loins and burning crotches making Joxer wonder what possessed her to become a writer in the first place. Unfortunately for her the barman's wife did not appreciate Gabrielle's comments and before long the two became embroiled in a massive argument. With only the slight hint of mischief energy somehow Gabby ended up knocking over a barrel of ale and the fighting started. The barman was trying to avoid looking smug at two women fighting 'over him' (as he saw it) even if his tavern was being wrecked. Hercules had Iolaus clinging to his back trying to calm him and pull him off the mortal he was pounding who had done nothing more then accidentally bump the demigod. Whilst Xena was trying to get to Gabrielle and pull the two women apart Joxer sat calmly in the center of the fighting unsure whom to help; his answer was swift in coming when one of the masses accidentally caught him in the eye with their elbow knocking him to the ground. 

 

With a bright flash of green Asyinnitos appeared the tiny Goddess completely out of place amidst the affray and Joxer struggled to pull himself off the ground, worried for her safety, he was confused when she laid a hand on his shoulder to stop him and glowered around. The diminutive Goddess looked tiny in comparison as she grabbed Hercules arm and pushed him to the ground like a naughty child, Iolaus tumbling off of his back to land dazed on the floor. She patted Iolaus apologetically before moving on. Hercules antagonist seemed intent of hitting the hero whilst he was down but something about the small glaring Goddess made him back off. "That's enough now" Asyinnitos spoke firmly and when getting no reply she clapped her hands sending a bolt of green power into the nearest ale barrel which exploded drenching everyone with cold ale. Gabrielle flopped to the ground blinking and licking her ale soaked hand as her opponent scurried off. The Goddess of Pregnancy and the Unborn concentrated feeling the mischief energy erratically leaking from Strife and she smiled. The foetal God was rapidly coming into his powers and was accidental letting out residual power after he used them. She could sense Strife had benefited from the fight but he needed to learn his boundaries and as Joxer wasn't a God he couldn't teach Strife them. 

 

Walking over to Joxer, she ignored the sheepish patrons as they began to tidy up and placed a hand on Joxer cupping his face "This may feel odd Joxer just bear with me" she spoke gently as she connected fully to Strife through him she could sense the need within the developing Godling to please his 'father' and be loved. Though foetal Strife only had a vague recollection of his adult memories, Joxer having a better one through his dreams, the foetal Godling felt the sharp needs Strife had had; to be loved and make people proud of him. Strife was to young to understand so Asyinnitos soothed him and bound down his powers slightly; the Godling would still have access but not enough to cause the mayhem he had today. 

 

Joxer was frowning at her, more confused then ever. His original suspicion he'd thrown out because it was far too preposterous but now he wasn't so sure. Something nagged at him as he tried to tie the Goddess into his new theory making it seem more plausible. Joxer wondered if Strife had done something to him before he died; not in a bad way he knew his friend never would have but somehow h was different- Joxer felt different. He was calmer, less clumsy and accident prone then ever before. The Gods seemed more interested in him then ever before and thanks to his dreams he was getting new insights into them; not to mention his body seemed to be going through some kind of change, his chest was sore and swollen, his stomach rebellious and alcohol just repulsed him. Joxer didn't like any of the ideas his mind threw at him but he kept them to himself as she finished whatever it was the Goddess did to make him feel all warm and tingly. 

 

Asyinnitos smiled and patted his cheek "It won't be long now Joxer I promise." She knew unless the mortal was constantly watched over by herself, her mother or Gaia they would have to arrange for him to stay with a deity like them to keep an eye on Strife. The foetus had just finished its critical development stage and was now entering an erratic period; its powers would fluctuate unless moderated which could possibly change Joxer and despite her slight binding someone needed to be there incase the foetus adapted or had a growth spurt. She leant up to kiss his cheek and murmured in his ear "I'll come for you tonight, to explain."

 

With a decidedly unimpressed look at Hercules, who was blustering in an attempt to appear in control despite being stuck to the ground, Asyinnitos turned to Xena smiling slightly at the suspicious look on her face. "I'm not here to hurt you but my business here is not of your concern." Her tone softened slightly, as Xena grew more guarded "At least not in present company." She added watching the demigods eyes flick to Hercules and back before she nodded. Asyinnitos smiled "All answers shall come in time." She raised an eyebrow at Gabrielle who managed to stand up and stagger over to them leaning on Xena, 

 

"She's evil, one of them Gods," she whispered far too loudly and poked Xena who promptly shrugged her shoulder displacing the woman's balance and sending her to the floor. Asyinnitos managed to swallow back a laugh and flashed to her mother's temple to collapse in hysterics. 

 

Joxer rubbed his nose as the bright green died away, now he was gong to find out what was going on he wasn't sure he wanted to. He knew enough to know whatever it was, was Godly and from what'd he'd seen they could do many fantastically unbelievable things. 

 

Gabrielle stared up at the vanishing green and frowned "Do our senses deceive just as our eyes could deceive us?" she asked unsure whether the Goddess was truly gone or not, her eyes widened almost comically, "she could be watching us, invisibly watching us!" she hissed staring around the room in suspicion "What if she's the Goddess of Deceivement? Or Ares in disguise?" 

 

Joxer caught Xena's eyes and the two both bit back smiles and shook their heads as they listened to Gabrielle's paranoid rant. When it finally finished Joxer vowed never to let the woman drink again and Xena tried to humor her to get her to go to bed; talking to her as though she were a child they left behind the still stuck Hercules and supported her until they got to the rooms they had rented. Giving Xena a sympathetic look Joxer left her to deal with her delusional girlfriend and managed to wait till he got into his own room before he collapsed with laughter on the bed. He was so swept up in releasing it, it was a few minutes before he realized he wasn't alone and raised his eyes to meet those of a very grim Ares.


	7. First encounters

  
Author's notes: Thank you Hallie for checking this over for me :)  


* * *

Joxer stared at Ares, his face going white as he swallowed back the giggles and almost choked in his haste. Seeing the God of War glare so coldly was enough to kill anyone’s good mood and had Joxer been drunk it would have sobered him up in an instant. He hesitated; still lying across the bed propped up slightly by his elbows Joxer was unsure of what to do. A part of him screamed to get up and stand in front of his God, *ex-God* he thought reminding himself, to apologise for leaving his service even if he had been a useless warrior. The other part (which was still furious over Strife’s treatment) wanted to glare as coldly back and demand what Ares was doing in his room before throwing the War God out on his backside. Unfortunately for Joxer his mind then took the opportunity to remind him that Ares could read thoughts which didn’t help his decision making and left the mortal staring silently at the War God in confusion; Ares who wasn’t in the best of moods took Joxer’s expression and silence for defiance.

 

His mouth still set in a grim line Ares stood up intent on showing the mortal how to properly respect his God when he noticed something he’d overlooked before; he couldn’t sense himself on Joxer at all, he could only sense Asyinnitos. His expression wrinkling into a frown Ares strode over to Joxer and taking the man’s shoulder, the God pulled him up into a sitting position so he could scan deeper. All he could sense was Asyinnitos’ signature on Joxer; his cousin seemed to have coated the mortal in it blocking off all other’s (though Ares couldn’t tell why) except for Cupids which, although faint, was also there. Ares mind was throwing up many different scenarios none of which appealed and all of which annoyed him so he telepathically probed Joxers mind picking up on the first thing Joxer was thinking about,

 

*Is he angry because I don’t worship him anymore or because of this thing with Asyinnitos and Cupid? * Joxer couldn’t help his current line of thinking especially when Ares was mystifying him; not only had Ares not thrown him from the bed and pounded him but the War God was stood beside Joxer’s bed holding him upright as he stared intensely at him

 

Joxer couldn’t help his current line of thinking especially when Ares was mystifying him; not only had Ares not thrown him from the bed and pounded him but the War God was stood beside Joxer’s bed holding him upright as he stared intensely at him 

Ares eyes narrowed at the thought of his son and cousin having anything to do with someone the God had considered one of *his* mortals but he released Joxer’s shoulder letting the mortal slump back against the bedsheets. Far too calmly Ares walked to the end of the bed and thought up a chair that he sat on keeping his gaze firmly fixed on Joxer.

 

"What thing would that be then Joxer?" The War God raised an eyebrow keeping his annoyance at bay, "Do you worship them now instead of me?" 

 

Ares couldn’t really see that happening; Joxer was too clueless for Cupid to have as a worshipper having spent far to much time mooning over Gabrielle and there was no way he could work in Asyinnitos service. The only way Ares could see that could possibly link Joxer, Cupid and Asyinnitos together was to assume they were both recruiting the mortal in some manner and the only likely reason they would be doing that was if they intended to start a baby boom with Joxer as (in Ares opinion) the very unsuited stud. The idea was extremely far fetched but it had been done before though under completely different circumstances for many complicated reasons. Ares had to reject the idea; Cupid was far too unstable at present to even think of such a venture besides Ares knew Aphrodite and Hera tended to work very closely with Asyinnitos on those such matters. Whilst Ares doubted his Mother would gossip he knew Aphrodite wouldn’t have been able to keep such a plan to herself. 

 

Ares found the idea that Joxer had left his service deeply insulting; although the man had been an incompetent warrior or hero he had been a source of amusement for Ares. Only now Ares wasn’t amused and Joxer wasn’t acting like a fool, which both intrigued and annoyed Ares. The God wasn’t sure whether Joxer had left his service for a reason or was just feeling suicidal but the man was obviously struggling to find an answer one Ares was positive wouldn’t satisfy him.

 

Joxer’s face twisted slightly in confusion at Ares questions but he automatically answered "I don’t worship anyone anymore." He clenched his fists waiting for Ares to blast him into tiny pieces but when the God merely frowned as if just as baffled, Joxer found new strength in being on a slightly more equal footing. "I gave up the Gods over a month ago, Cupid and Asyinnitos are the only one’s I’ve seen since then." he continued finding it very insulating that it had taken Ares over a month to realise that he was no longer worshipping him; Joxer wondered if all the tributes he’d made were redundant, had Ares never listened to the prayers Joxer had faithfully made each night? He felt a nasty feeling settle in the pit of his stomach as it dawned on him that obviously Ares hadn’t considered him in any way at all; Joxer could see now that, to Ares, he wasn’t worthy of anything at all. Rather then depress the mortal- it infuriated him; now Joxer’s fists were clenched for another reason, "and since when are you so bothered about who I do and don’t worship? Did turning my back on you hurt your pride?" he asked annoyance beginning to show on his face, "Or did it just piss you off that I dared?"

 

Ares stared at Joxer in disbelief, a mere mortal was questioning him and rudely at that something the God would not tolerate. Feeling anger rise in him at Joxer words Ares stood up stalking back over to the bed, he had every intention of teaching the man a lesson he would never forget when he picked up on something else around Joxer, something that flickered briefly amidst Asyinnitos signiture. He lunged at Joxer grabbing him by the shoulders and pinning him to the bed as the mortal tried to pull away; Ares concentrated on the tiny abnormality within the signature surrounding Joxer and focussed his power on it pulling it out to examine it. The answer hit him full in the face and he staggered letting go of Joxer and almost collapsing on him as finally he sensed it- Strife. 

 

Shaking slightly, Joxer resisted the urge to poke the War God who was lying on top of him; Joxer had been sure, the instant outrage had flooded the God’s face that he was due a one way ticket to the Underworld. Despite holding his ground the mortal had started shaking the instant he’d answered Ares and it had only intensified when the God had seized him. Joxer tried to shift slightly extremely uncomfortable because of Ares proximity, not only was the God lying across him in a position only his dreams knew about but he was also lying directly on Joxer’s chest and bladder- the former of which was sore, the latter full. Joxer shifted again trying turn the God so his head was no longer in the nape of his neck to get a look at Ares face to see if the God had actually passed out. The movement merely pushed Ares slightly to one side so that his leather vest scraped Joxers sore chest, the thin material of his vest barely protecting the man’s tender nipples. Joxer yelped pushing more against Ares as the God stirred and propped himself up, his elbows either side of Joxers chest; biting off a sigh of relief Joxer stared up at Ares, confusion was on the God’s face for a second before he pushed himself up and jumped up trying to exude a semblance of calm whilst he moved back to his chair. 

 

Hesitantly Joxer sat up and seeing the God merely watching him decided to take a chance "I need to um, you know, um go," he looked at Ares trying to convey his meaning and when the God nodded Joxer managed to stand up on his shaky legs and make his way to the door. Just as he passes Ares chair the God’s hand shot out grasping Joxer around the wrist and barring his way, despite the forceful grip Joxer kept his eyes on Ares willing the God to let him go, his bladder was filled to bursting and even if he did try to run away Ares would only find him later. 

 

Slowly Ares let go of Joxer’s wrist not seeing the fingermarks he’d left behind, he allowed the man to pass him and was slightly surprised to find Joxer outside relieving himself and not trying to run away. Ares wasn’t sure what the other God’s were doing to the mortal but he was starting to get at least one idea even if, unbeknownst to him, it was the wrong one. When Ares had sense Strife’s familiar signature amongst the others around Joxer he’d been instantly bowled over by the feelings that arose in him. Grief had threatened to overpower him once again and Ares had had to concentrate and block the signature from his mind, which had caused him to collapse on Joxer. The idea that he’d collapsed on a mortal was embarrassing enough but usually the mortal in question would be threatened until he didn’t dare reveal to anyone Ares brief weakness. Ares could only assume that finding Strife’s very faint signature on Joxer meant the mortal had either been Strife’s lover (which he doubted because of Aphrodite’s impotence curse) or his child, something he hoped wasn’t true because it would reinforce the idea that Strife could have cheated on Cupid whilst they were together. 

 

Ares snapped out of his musings as Joxer hesitantly walked back into the room, carefully closing the door behind him; Ares was impressed the mortal hadn’t considered waking Xena or Hercules but he refused to let it show. The God wasn’t sure why the mortal bothered him so much; it wasn’t just because he thought Joxer could be Strife’s son or because Joxer left his service that was only a small amount of it, the mortal just made him uncomfortable and Ares disliked being uncomfortable. He noticed the bruising around Joxer wrist as the man hesitant sat down, trying hard not to rub at his wrist. "Does it hurt?" Ares asked raising an eyebrow as Joxer looked at him in bewilderment, "the wrist, is it sore?" 

 

Joxer was bewildered more then anything else; there was something almost surreal the slightly psychopathic God he was attracted to asking him if his wrist hurt. He shook his head, "No, not really."

 

Slightly relieved though he wasn’t sure why, Ares put his behaviour down to guilt over Strife’s death. The God guessed he was overcompensating with Joxer because he assumed the mortal was Strife’s son, after all there was no other explanation why Joxer would have Strife’s signature imprinted on him. Ares sighed, "Let’s start again shall we?" he asked as he leant against one side of the chair "I won’t read your thoughts again but I do expect honest answers." He kept his eyes fixed on Joxer’s, "How did you know Strife and what are you doing with Cupid and Asyinnitos?" 

 

Feeling an involuntary belly lurch at the mention of Strife, Joxer swallowed hard and struggled to find an answer; finally he settled on one which he, very softly, told Ares. "Strife was my friend; he was one of my best friends since I was a child." He wasn’t sure where Ares had got Strife’s name from, briefly it crossed his mind that maybe Ares could sense something that Joxer couldn’t; he was uneasy talking about his friend especially when he guessed Strife had something to do with the other God’s protecting him.

 

Ares considered this, nodding slightly as it confirmed his theory that Joxer was a child of Strifes. Whilst the knowledge that the Mischief God had cheated on Cupid more then once infuriated him Ares couldn’t help but remember Asyinnitos words about someone forcing Strife to father Psyche without his consent. The idea made Ares think, it definitely had merits; he was guilty of believing the worst of Strife through most of the Godlings life now his death had proven that to Ares, he was determined to not let that happen again. One way or another Ares would find out who forced Strife to father his children and somehow make it up to the God; Ares had only realised once his nephew had died how fond he was of him. The War God disliked using the word love but he had a definite fondness for Strife, the same as he had with all his own children. He’d all but raised Strife as a young Godling and taught him as best he could; Ares regretted standing by whilst Strife was persecuted by the other God’s for something he wouldn’t have done and resolved to not only clear his nephews name but to also work harder on getting Hades to find Strife and bring him back. Ares started slightly out of his musings as he realised Joxer was speaking to him; the mortals voice was soft but focussed,

 

"Why do you care what happened to Strife? You left him alone when he was dying and then you left his body for anyone to get their hands on. Wasn’t he even worth coming back for?" Joxer willed his voice to remain steady, something about Ares expression made him want to shake the God roughly and force him to see what he had lost; the mortal was unprepared for the sadness that clouded the War God’s face and the shame that followed seconds later. 

 

"Yes I did," Ares answered his voice calm not betraying the turmoil he felt within, not only at the new revelations or the mention of his dead nephew but at the part he played in Strife’s death. Ares had been so intent on getting what he wanted and what he thought was best that he’d never worried about his nephews’ safety. Even though he’d believed the hinds blood could kill a God Ares had, in his arrogance, assumed that death would only be temporary until Hades and Zeus would concede that the God returned. Ares had been compelled by guilt to ask them to bring Strife back but when neither had been able to locate Strife and reinstate him as a God, the War God had had a very unwelcome epiphany.

 

"I’m not going to explain my actions to you, the relationship Strife and I had was very …difficult," Ares searched for the right word, "But I did care for him and I will do everything in my power to bring him back. I miss him." He admitted not seeing the effect his words had on Joxer. 

 

Joxer had felt a deep rage at the arrogance of Ares first words but the fury had tempered slightly at his last admission, "So why didn’t you come back for him then?" Joxer decided to push his luck; he wasn’t willing to take ‘I’m a God I don’t have to explain’ he wanted to know the truth; he felt like he owed Strife to find out. "I know most of the Gods hate him but no one came back for him not even you or his Mother." Joxer paused, "And no one seemed to mourn him either, not until Cupid," he avoided mentioning just how he had found out that Cupid grieved for Strife and what the Love God had discussed with Asyinnitos merely adding "the last time I saw him he was slightly ballistic over Strife’s death."

 

Ares tried to quash the relief he felt at hearing Joxers explanation; only a small part (to his shame) was from the knowledge that Strife hadn’t been alone when he died and that, Ares presumed, Joxer had been the one to give him a Warriors burial. He ignored the fact that Strife’s death had undoubtedly been the thing that made Joxer forsake his faith. The War God also didn’t want to examine why he was feeling relieved over his son’s motives for seeing Joxer and putting his protection on the mortal. "Well I didn’t really think you were Cupids type." He paused not willing to go into the relationship between Strife and Cupid or Olympian politics, "I’m guessing he noticed what I did, it makes sense why he would go slightly crazy." Ares rubbed his neck, not only was everything starting to connect he was beginning to feel more confident about what to do next. It was almost a shame that he unknowingly had things connected so wrong; noticing that Joxer was about to start asking more questions Ares hurriedly added, 

 

"As for Asyinnitos, I would hope you aren’t sleeping with my cousin. Her naiveté, despite her age, far outweighs your own. However a soft spot she had for Strife doesn’t mean she can let her heart rule her head and embrace you in an attempt to get him back; Besides you aren’t her type," Ares isn’t sure he added that and he swiftly moves on "No wonder she’s cursing everyone; I must admit I never believed she would be the one to punish everyone for their mistakes with Strife but I suppose it’s in her blood." the War God smirked slightly as Joxer blushed deeply and shook his head obviously denying a relationship between himself and the Goddess. 

 

"No I’ve never slept with a Goddess before or God for that matter," Joxer shook his head trying to stop the blush coating his cheeks from deepening, "And she was only young, much to young for me."

 

Ares warded off the urge to smile at Joxer and merely moved closer to tower over the flustered mortal as he babbled more denials; leaning down until he was face to face with Joxer he was slightly amused by the mortals ability to talk, Ares was almost tempted to grab him by the shoulders and instruct him to ‘breathe’- he was positive the mortal would pass out before he gave up explaining himself.

 

"I’ve never slept with anyone with even a hint of Godly blood." Joxer added as he tried to emphasise his point; he wasn’t sure why he was so adamant Ares believed him but he had an inkling that it was because of his attraction to the God.

 

"Pity," Ares murmured as if in answer to Joxer’s words which cut off the man’s chatter mid sentence leaving both mortal and God staring at each other, their faces only centimetres apart. Joxer, unsure of how to react when the object of his fantasies was so close to him, stilled staring up into his ex-God’s eyes. Ares eyes remained fixed on the mortal wondering why he invoked such a response in him, he was torn between kissing the mortal and flashing away; never one to take the coward’s way out Ares made the first move and leant forward pressing his lips firmly against Joxers. When he felt the mans lips parted slightly as he responded to the kiss, Ares deepened it slipping his tongue into Joxers mouth to tease the mortals own.

 

Both men were so engrossed in their kiss they didn’t notice the bright flash that lit up the room but Ares definitely noticed the power that ripped him from Joxer making him stagger back. 

 

"Pig!"

 

Ares grimaced at the small fist that planted itself in his back, though the punch hadn’t been hard by any standards he was slightly put out that someone had dared punch him and turned to glare at his cousin who pushed passed him to check Joxer over. His lips slightly swollen from the kiss, Joxer blushed deeply as Asyinnitos ran her hands over his upper body scanning him anxiously. Seemingly satisfied the tiny Goddess twisted around to face Ares matching the War God’s scowl with an almost identical one,

 

"How dare you attempt to block me from him?" Asyinnitos hands went immediately to her hips as she attempted to out-glare the War God in front of her, "What in Zeus’ name are you even doing here?"

 

Ares licked his lips, still tasting Joxer on them, he resisted the urge to smile; his anger at his cousin had faded the moment he’d seen her concern was that of a mother not that of a lover. Knowing that reinforced his belief that Joxer was Strife’s son and made Ares more determined to get back to Olympus to start clearing Strife’s name and finding a way to bring the dead God back. Holding up his hands in apology Ares answered her, not going with his traditional ‘I’m a God line’ and trying not to smile at the look of furious indignation on her face, "I apologise. I was a little concerned over the relationship between you, Cupid and Joxer." The bewilderment that flooded Asyinnitos face fuelled Ares belief that she was fond of Joxer but not in love with him and he continued,

 

"I won’t try to block you again and I won’t bother Joxer either," Ares looked towards Joxer and smiled unable to resist adding, "Unless he wants me to of course," before he flashing out of the room leaving behind an extremely confused mortal and Goddess.


	8. Truths and Guilt

  
Author's notes:  
Unbetaed chapter at present so apologies for mistakes  


* * *

As the light from Ares departure faded Joxer licked his lips not quite believing what had just happened- that the War God had kissed him; noticing Asyinnitos still fuming by his side Joxer briefly entertained the idea that the God’s were all at least slightly warped if not completely insane. Not only were Asyinnitos and Cupid apparently looking after him and causing chaos but Ares also seemed interested in seeing him too; briefly thinking back on the War god’s last words Joxer blushed as he realised he’d never been as willing to be bothered by the God’s as he was at the moment. Even if he was becoming increasingly aware that all of the God’s were hiding something from him, something obviously important and worrying. 

 

 

The blush on his cheeks faded as he looked up at the young Goddess next to him who looked down at him, her scowl changing into a smile as she observed his fluster. "Relax Joxer," Asyinnitos advised him sensing embarrassment and worry rising inside the mortal; what she was about to tell him would be difficult to grasp as it was but she didn’t want the news to overshadow or add to any other worries the man had. It wasn’t healthy for either Joxer or the baby for the mortal to worry about Ares or anyone and anything else. She sighed, mortals had so many more worries then God’s which, though sometimes useful wasn’t now. She needed Joxer focussed so she could make him understand what she was about to tell him, it would be hard enough for his mind to comprehend when it was focussed but if he was distracted and trying to figure things out himself it would be a lot more difficult. She sat down behind him and stroked his back briefly to calm him; she’d always found in babies that stroking was calming, especially on the back, and that it lasted well into adulthood.

 

 

Joxer usually disliked his back being stroked unless it was by a bed partner but the Goddess’s touch was light almost soothing and the man relaxed into it his worries diminishing slightly. Although he couldn’t be certain Joxer was almost completely sure that Asyinnitos was going to tell him the truth, however weird and fantastic that truth would be. He shivered slightly feeling something move over him and pale mist spread throughout the room; as the mist disappeared Joxer could see the edges of the walls and door glowing slightly.

 

 

"It’s a silencer," Joxer turned to look at the Goddess who averted her eyes flushing slightly before she continued, "It stops other Gods and Goddesses listening in not to mention any mortals who may be awake."

 

 

Joxer’s brow furrowed slightly, he didn’t see the need for all the secrecy; even though he knew something was going on he had his doubts that it would really that important after all he was involved, surely if it was that big a deal Hercules of Xena would have been-not him. As if she read his mind (which she hadn’t, just his expression) Asyinnitos continued softly, 

 

 

"You are important to us Joxer and this is a big deal." 

 

 

Now that Joxer did have trouble believing. What importance could he be when he had revoked all the God’s including his own? He opened his mouth to interrupt and closed it as she gently laid a finger on his lips.

 

 

"You are important Joxer, very important." Asyinnitos took a deep breath as hundred of ideas whirled around her mind, she wasn’t entirely sure the best way to tell Joxer he was carrying a Godly child. Not only would she have to explain how but who and why; she was sure just announcing ‘your pregnant’ would either floor him or send him into hysterical laughter. She settled for her only option, to play it by ear and explain bit by bit. "Do you remember…no that’s silly of course you do," she corrected herself her eyes fixing on Joxer’s, "Six weeks ago Strife the God of Mischief was murdered, his body abandoned to its own fate."

 

 

Joxer’s mouth dropped open in shock, he felt like she had just punched him in the throat of everything he had expected she would say that hadn’t been one of them; blinking back angry tears at the thoughts and memories her words invoked he managed to hold himself together long enough to curtly nod in answer.

 

 

Asyinnitos continued as Joxer turned around completely to face her, "You found him just before he died, just before he gave up." She felt a lump in her own throat and had to cough to clear it as, once again, her own guilt surfaced reminding her that Strife had been alone and terrified. "I don’t know what you said to him, Gaia refuses to tell us, whatever you did say he heard. I don’t know how he came up with the idea but I know Gaia gave him the energy to carry it out, to survive."

 

 

Joxer eyes narrowed in anger at her words, words that seemed ridiculous given the circumstances, "I think you might have missed something Asyinnitos, Strife didn’t survive. Yes, I was with him when he died. No, no other God or Goddess including yourself bothered to help him." He paused his brow furrowed in confusion, "And Gaia wasn’t even there! I know she’s all powerful but she didn’t help Strife, no one helped Strife! He died in my arms and not one of you bothered to look back and even take his body."

 

 

Trying not to wince at the pain Joxer’s words caused, Asyinnitos kept her eyes firmly on Joxer’s face, "No his body died; it couldn’t cope with the poison, but Strife’s soul survived." She looked so earnest that Joxer, who had been about to interrupt, kept quiet his attention held solely on her as she tried to explain. "It’s never been heard of before, not with a mortal anyway, God’s have to use a lot of energy up and it doesn’t always work often Hera and I have to help the Godling along. The Hinds blood damaged Strife so much that he used the little power he had left to transfer to the nearest available person- you."

 

 

"What’s never…" Joxer broke off his sentence rapidly and started checking himself over, even inclining his head to peer at his back as he tried to work out how Strife had apparently transferred to him. Whilst he couldn’t believe what she said, he did have a suspicion that the strange dreams he was having could have been from Strife, if the God had transferred to him that was. He kept looking, growing more confused each minute, he only stopped searching when a soft laugh reached his ears to which he looked at the Goddess in indignation. 

 

 

Asyinnitos blushed deeply smiling at Joxer, it wasn’t an unkind smile and it was obvious she wasn’t laughing at him, "He’s nowhere you can see Joxer and he isn’t exactly himself anymore; remember what I am Goddess of?" she asked and placed a hand on his stomach. "Strife was to weak too become an adult again, he had to rest and allow himself time to gather his power once more and be reborn. He transferred to you because you were his friend, you must have been willing to do anything for him," she murmured, her eyes drifted to Joxer’s belly and then back up again, "You saved him Joxer. You let him start again, within you, as an infant once more." At Joxer’s blank look she added, "You’re pregnant Joxer, Strife is the infant inside you." She smiled slightly glad to have delivered the good news though it waned slightly as Joxer’s blank look remained.

 

 

"You’re joking," Joxer’s voice was flat; his mind unable to understand the news she’d delivered, "Men don’t have babies, especially not God babies." He spoke the words aloud to reassure himself and push back the shrill voice that screamed in his head that things were making sense; the way Joxer had been feeling of late, the interest the God’s had shown, even Cupid’s behaviour. He rested his elbows on his lap and covered his face trying to ignore the tiny voice that shed all the self-doubt onto his simple sentence, ‘men don’t have babies’. After a few minutes he ran his hands down his face and looked up seeing the anxious expression on Asyinnitos face, "This is insane," he spoke quietly at first and then laughed as hysteria started to take over, "Completely insane, you know that? This is a trick right? A punishment for cremating Strife and turning my back on all of you." He laughed again unable to shake the panic that threatened to overwhelm him, "There is no way I’m pregnant!" he shouted clenching his fists as the Goddess jumped in shock. 

 

 

Joxer would have kept denying it to himself if he hadn’t been looking at Asyinnitos; her face was stricken, almost on the verge of tears, and regardless of his anger Joxer felt an overwhelming guilt at upsetting the young Goddess. Reaching out to take her hand, he ignored her flinch and gently massaged her palm as he tried to put everything she’d said into context. He could see the truth in her face and so he tried to think back, reflecting on her words. "The rumble, when the ground shook, that was Gaia wasn’t it?" he spoke gently and felt a little better when, hesitantly, she nodded. Spurred on he continued as more things came to mind, "These dreams I’ve been having, the one’s where I seem to be Strife? They’re his aren’t they?"

 

 

Asyinnitos nodded, she wasn’t used to people shouting in the way he had, she generally avoided Olympus because of it. She definitely hadn’t expected him to react the way he had, *but then who am I to judge? * She thought. She had never had children only cared for other peoples and had never been pregnant herself, she should have expected this and not been so sensitive at his mood. Looking into his face she nodded more strongly this time and answered his questions, "Yes the ground shaking that was Gaia, she was and still is, most unhappy with us all. With the exception of my mother and myself she will not see the other Gods, she’s too angry with them. I think she’s also using a lot of energy on you Joxer, to help your body through this." She smiled slightly, "I’m only the Goddess of pregnancy and the Unborn, I keep Strife healthy inside you and moderate his powers the best I can but I haven’t been able to help you through this as much as I would have liked." She took a deep breath wondering how best to explain the dreams, "They are Strife’s memories." She answered looking slightly unhappy at the thought as she continued, "I know they aren’t pleasant but baby Strife can’t remember them only you can. As he grows his adult memories will replay in reverse in your subconscious, when he reaches his first memory they will all be stored in his mind until he is old enough to understand them himself."

 

 

Although he had expected it, Joxer was horrified that what he had witnessed in his dreams were true memories of Strife’s; he could only console himself that he wouldn’t allow anything like that would to happen to Strife again and that the dreams brought him closer to his friend.

 

 

*My baby?* He wondered placing a hand on his stomach in wonder. He looked at Asyinnitos, "Strife will be my son? Won’t he be Strife anymore?" the idea that he would wholly get his friend back made him immensely happy and worried at the same time; Joxer wasn’t sure Strife wouldn’t grow up in an instant and have to go back to his unfriendly existence, "Is he mine? My baby, my son?" He hadn’t been sure he’d wanted to know but as he’d said the words ‘my son’ a sense of pride had come over him, one that was unrivalled by anything else.

 

He wondered placing a hand on his stomach in wonder. He looked at Asyinnitos, "Strife will be my son? Won’t he be Strife anymore?" the idea that he would wholly get his friend back made him immensely happy and worried at the same time; Joxer wasn’t sure Strife wouldn’t grow up in an instant and have to go back to his unfriendly existence, "Is he mine? My baby, my son?" He hadn’t been sure he’d wanted to know but as he’d said the words ‘my son’ a sense of pride had come over him, one that was unrivalled by anything else. 

 

 

Smiling in delight Asyinnitos softly pressed her own hand back onto Joxer’s stomach, "Yes and no Joxer. He is still and always be the soul that he was but this time he has the chance to be so much more." Her smile grew wistful as she stroked Joxer’s fingers, "He will be your son; though his appearance will remain the same he will have no memory of what happened before until he is grown up, and believe me he will grow up slowly Joxer. No one will be able to force maturity on him." Sensing Strife move within Joxer and kick for the first time her eyes lit up happily, she could feel it even if Strife wasn’t strong enough for Joxer to feel yet. "Will you rectify the mistake’s we’ve made? Help us sort them?" 

 

 

Joxer rubbed his belly thoughtfully; it didn’t take much thinking to answer the question it was an automatic yes, he missed his friend deeply and he felt more then honoured that Strife had considered him enough of a friend and trusted him enough to put his new fragile body in him. Even if he was terrified at the idea of being pregnant. The other thing that worried him was keeping Strife’s imminent return from the other God’s, it didn’t affect his decision just troubled him, "Of course,"

 

 

Asyinnitos could barely keep herself from squealing in delight; somehow she managed to nod happily at the man before shocking him and throwing her arms about his neck in a hug, "This is going to be so good; I can help you on the pregnancy things and get Cupid’s help in protecting you from the other’s. Gaia and my mother are going to want to see you and we’ll have to settle about organising Strife’s powers and…"

 

 

Slightly surprised by the Goddess, Joxer patted her back gently and smiled at her as she pulled back, a hot blush staining her cheeks. "Strife’s powers?" he asked unable to hold back a grin as she beamed happily at him,

 

 

"Strife’s powers; you might have noticed he isn’t against using them on any of us. I believe you had a few problems with words earlier? As did I, though I think it was your friends that bore the brunt of them." Asyinnitos stifled a smile at the memory, "When a Godling is still unborn, the parent who carry’s him or her to term regulates their powers and stops them from making too much mischief." She couldn’t quite hide her smile at the words, "Strife having mischief as part of his Godhood, keeps playing with his powers but because you are mortal you can’t stop him the way a God could. Discord prevented him from ever accessing all his power and almost cut him off from part of it but now what she stole has been returned to him. I can control his powers up to a point, but mischief being what it is, is very hard to tone down."

 

 

Joxer had to laugh, it sounded pure Strife; now he thought of it, all of it was pure Strife, from Gabrielle’s foot-rot and Xena’s lice to Hercules’ drunkenness. He jumped slightly as a large marble bowl of water appeared in between, "water? I’m not nauseous at the moment." 

 

 

Angling the bowl for that it rested comfortably in between them, Asyinnitos shook her head and looked into Joxer’s eyes, "It’s a seeing pool, only small but it should do the trick," Joxer’s vest disappeared in a flash and he jumped as cool air caused his sore nipples to harden; before he could protest her hand was on his stomach and, for once, appearing older then he was she spoke, "I have seen It all before you know, I am Goddess of Pregnancy." She peered at his nipples and Joxer had to resist the urge to cover them with his hand, "Breast swelling is common, we will just have to be careful that you don’t get mastitis. If you alternate between hot and cold compresses and gently massage, it should help with the pain and prevent infection."

 

 

"I don’t have breasts," Joxer blushed an the amused look she gave him, conceding that in some form he did have them and since her area was pregnancy and all it’s side effects he would agree with her. 

 

 

Asyinnitos closed her eyes concentrating on Strife; one hand on Joxer’s stomach she projected the image of the foetus on to the water in the bowl. 

 

 

As a warm feeling settled over his belly Joxer gazed into the marble bowl; he almost didn’t believe his eyes as the water rippled and became a deep pink colour before a peachy blob formed in the centre. Joxer inclined his head this way and that as the blob spread forming a vague baby shape that glowed ever so slightly. He itched to reach out and touch it in wonder but worried that the image would disappear all together. "That’s Strife?" he looked closer, the baby was more developed then he had expected; Strife almost looked like a baby, only very tiny and without a few of the essentials, no hair, eyebrows but he could see tiny fingernails and toes, not to mention … yep Strife was definitely being reborn as a boy. 

 

 

Joxer looked up at Asyinnitos, "That’s amazing," his voice was quiet as he was humbled by what he saw, his lips curled slightly into a soft smile as Strife waved his tiny arms slightly and he had to remind himself not to wave back- Strife couldn’t see him. He felt Asyinnitos as she shivered slightly and she removed her hand from his stomach. Disappointed, he looked at her as she waved her hand making everything disappear in a muted blue flash;

 

 

"I’m sorry," Asyinnitos looked apologetic, "I need to find Cupid before he goes too far. We need him to help regulate Strife’s powers and I should go and see Gaia, she wanted to know how you were earlier but I got pulled into a meeting by Zeus." 

 

 

"What should I do?" Inwardly Joxer was still reeling from news of his pregnancy and Strife’s return, his mind was already listing potential problems and he wasn’t sure he could put them off for too long.

 

 

Asyinnitos patted him gently on the shoulder, "Carry on as you were," she ran a hand over his face and wrist removing the pain from the bruising he’d sustained earlier. "I will catch up with you in a few days which should give you time to think things through. If you need me though, just call for me." She stroked his cheek gently and Joxer couldn’t help leaning into the touch needing reassurance, "Take care." 

 

 

As the blue flash cleared and the dark spots around his vision faded Joxer lay back on the bed contemplating Strife, pregnancy and Ares. 

 

 

On Olympus most of the God’s and Goddesses were trying to avoid Cupid who was, after spending time with Bliss to convince him daddy still loved him and was just playing a game, systematically moving from temple to temple to find anything remotely connected to Strife.

 

 

One God was not hiding from Cupid’s rampage or trying to convince him to calm down; instead he was silently watching Cupid’s actions from a viewing pool that Hera had set up in his Temple, whilst trying to ignore his own guilt and focus on finding a way to tell Cupid the truth. He didn’t want to reveal to Cupid the truth about Psyche and Strife but since the Mischief God’s death, guilt had consumed all of his waking thoughts and the God had had very little sleep.

 

 

Ashamed by his past actions and scared of losing his family, he could only watch as Cupids image rippled in the water and was replaced by that of a very determined Ares; he could only hope that sooner of later he would gather enough courage to tell his family the truth.


	9. Coming to conclusions

  
Author's notes: Unbeta'd chapter-sorry  


* * *

Joxer flinched and twisted to one side as he awakened from the latest set of nightmares, which he now painfully dubbed ‘Strife’s former life’. A little sweaty and trembling slightly he sat up rubbing his face vigorously; he hadn’t expected more memories to resurface for a few days, he’d been sure that his dreams would be about his own worries. Tiredly dragging himself over to the small washstand in the corner of the room Joxer quickly bathed the best he could and, after briefly hesitating, used cold compresses on his chest. He grimaced as he massaged the tender skin around his nipples, not wanting to touch them when they were swollen; he was worried about what would happen if he didn’t, he didn’t want mastitis but worse was his worry that Asyinnitos would take over, massaging it herself if she thought he wasn’t doing it. The idea of anyone touching him there was embarrassing enough but from what he’d seen of the Goddess he doubted that would stop her. 

 

Jumping at a knock on the door, Joxer got up and hastily pulled on his vest hiding his swollen pecs from view; he grimaced as the rough material aggravated him and opened the door almost falling backwards as Xena and Iolaus both strode in.

 

“Won’t you both come in,” he murmured sarcastically under his breath as they walked passed him. 

 

Iolaus seemed intent on nosing around the room but Xena at least was courteous enough to speak to him, “Sorry Joxer, I thought you might like to come into town with us. Gabrielle refused to get out of bed, or bathe,” a look of disgust briefly crossed her face as she recalled the vile smell that had come from the bard. “I’m not sure how long Hercules will stay in bed but I doubt Gabrielle will be out till tomorrow, hopefully she’ll have at least washed before we get back;” she added under her breath.

 

Joxer stifled a laugh unable to feel in the slightest bit sorry for either of them and slightly impressed as he recalled the way baby Strife had manipulated them all the night before, “Yeah, there’s a few things I would like to get and...” 

 

Xena nodded cutting him off, “Let’s go then.” Obviously taking charge she walked from the room leaving both Joxer and Iolaus to follow her. Whilst the hunter hurried to catch up with her, Joxer finished bathing before he pulled on his shoes and made his way after them; seeing them waiting outside the building he made his way jovially over to them, whistling slightly. Although he stopped himself from singing his song he still had a whistle it, even if it was just to annoy Xena and Iolaus. He managed to hide a grin as he realised that since Strife’s powers were suppressed, the mischief he was doing was all his own, as was his newfound attitude. His friend’s death had given him a new attitude and made him recognise that just like the God’s themselves had faults, so did their demigod offspring; Joxer knew that learning Strife and he were friends had tarred his own image especially in Gabrielle’s eyes but now he found himself turning away from some of his so-called friends. He doubted it was Strife’s influence; he’d tried to ignore the truth about them his friends for too long, now Joxer was being himself rather then pleasing the crowd they were starting to show their true colours. The idea that he would lose his friends, whether it was because they found out he was pregnant or because he had finally begun standing up for himself, hurt him deeply; Joxer forced himself to remain optimistic, if he could change so could they and if they didn’t that was their loss. 

 

Joxer had to smile at the small frown on Xena’s face, the Warrior Princess had obviously expected him to jump to her commands and hadn’t been impressed when they’d had to wait for him. He whistled loudly as he joined them and broke off, grinning slightly at the grimace on Iolaus’s face as he placed the tune. “So is shopping all we have planned for today?” 

 

To her credit Xena didn’t brush him off, “No, I thought we’d take a look at Apollo and Cupid’s temples, maybe try to talk to them. I heard a few disturbing rumours last night; apparently Cupid hasn’t been to his temple in months even to receive tributes from his favoured priests and Apollo has kept himself barricaded in his.” A slight smile curved her lips as she remembered some of the more interesting rumours, “apparently his favoured mortals are getting a little panicked, seems he hasn’t been blessing them in any way for a few weeks now.”

 

Even Iolaus couldn’t hide a smirk at that. Apollo, like most of the other God’s, prided himself on being a great lover and the idea that the God had gone soft (however appropriate the saying was) was more then a little amusing especially given the number of favoured mortals he had. 

 

Joxer hadn’t smiled at the comment; it wasn’t that he didn’t find it funny, he found it amusing and appropriate, but Apollo had recently featured a lot in the dreams he’d been having and Joxer had gone from being indifferent to the God, to intensely disliking him. So far in Strife’s memories Apollo hadn’t gone out of his way to actually hurt the mischief God himself, unlike some of his other relatives, but he hadn’t helped him either. In the last dream Joxer had had, Strife had desperately gone to Apollo for healing; not only had Apollo refused to actually help him, he’d transported the injured God to the worst place he’d possible could- one of Discord’s temples. The injured Mischief God hadn’t stood a chance against Discord who’d taken great pleasure in tormenting him until Ares had finally realised what had happened and retrieved him. Joxer had no way of knowing how long it had taken for Strife to heal after his ordeal but he’d guessed it was a while especially since the mortal had been witness to some of the more imaginative torments she’d carried out on Strife. Deep in thought Joxer jumped slightly as Iolaus spoke, the sudden interruption snapping him out of the bad memories.

 

“There’s been a lot of that going around.” Iolaus crossed his arms over his chest; “This isn’t the only place where the God’s seem to be going insane. Before Herc and I got here we passed three villages, all whose shrines to Aphrodite had exploded and one city where her whole temple had vanished. The people there also said similar things happened to some of the other God’s; two of Athena’s statues melted, all of Ares horses were released from one of his stables and a bunch of Amazons tried to convert to Hestian virgins.” He shook his head, “sound’s like complete chaos to me” 

 

Joxer knew exactly who was responsible but he wasn’t going to enlighten the others; catching sight of someone heading for them he groaned inwardly, having hoped for a morning off from Hercules opinions.

 

“Sounds like Discord to me,” Xena sighed looking grim at the idea, “You and Hercules know what she’s like better then I do, do you think she could be involved?” she asked the question to Iolaus but she didn’t turn her back on Joxer and shut him out, which the man was grateful for. Unfortunately Hercules caught the end of her sentence and couldn’t resist adding his own comments,

 

“She could easily be involved,” the scowl on Hercules face spoke volumes about his mood, “Especially after last night, she must have done something to us,” the demigod couldn’t believe that he’d actually become drunk and acted so boorish without Godly intervention. Iolaus rolled his eyes at the comment and locked eyes with Joxer as he gave a small shrug; although Joxer knew on some level Hercules was right and that he’d become intoxicated due to Strife but Iolaus just believed that Hercules was trying to justify and blame his behaviour on anyone else. The look on Xena’s face made it plainly clear she didn’t agree with Hercules either but she wasn’t about to argue with the hero; once Hercules got an idea into his head, especially one involving the Gods, he remained obsessed with it until something was done. 

 

Joxer sighed quietly as he took in Hercules and Xena’s expressions, the differences between their attitudes sometimes amazed him; Hercules was so committed to protecting the innocent and fighting against the Gods, that he often came across as thick-headed and arrogant even though there were times when he could be the nicest person. Xena, like Hercules, didn’t get on with many of the God’s but even though she might believe them to be involved a lot of things she usually kept her thoughts to herself until she was sure; whereas Hercules jumped in like an overeager child, happy to point his finger at the God’s and blame them for anything and everything. Joxer had always been aware the God’s had their faults and were more like mortals then they’d care to admit, he also knew that they did interfere with mortals a lot and play games for their own selfish desires; but never once had he believed they were solely responsible. Hercules tended to conveniently forget that normal mortals did have some measure of free will. Hercules preferred to believe it was the God’s that caused each and every problem that there was rather then have to blame mortal failings, his own failings. Joxer hated that that it was Godly problems that were causing problems in Greece at the moment, that Hercules was right and not just jumping to conclusions.

 

“If Discord’s behind this then Ares is responsible,” Hercules was adamant that Ares was behind everything that went wrong regardless of what it was.

 

Looking around at the small group Joxer was amazed to see Iolaus nodding his head in agreement, he couldn’t understand how either of them automatically assumed everything bad centred on Ares and he couldn’t help feeling a little annoyed for the God too. Joxer was about to open his mouth and say something he’d have regretted when Xena interjected,

 

“I doubt Ares behind this just because Discord might be,” Xena sighed, rubbing her head, “Besides we don’t even know if Discord is involved anyway.” She looked from Hercules to Iolaus who were staring at her open mouthed, “well you don’t, do you?”

 

Iolaus shrugged, “It seems like she’s a good bet, the only other person I’d think blame would be Ares little toady but since he’s ugh!” he broke off sharply as Hercules elbowed him in the side.

 

Joxer’s eyes narrowed at Iolaus’s comment, “Ares little toady?” he asked quietly; an unpleasant smile started to form on his lips as he felt his anger grow, he kept his gaze firmly on Iolaus and didn’t notice Xena move close to his side. 

 

“You have to admit this was his style,” Hercules smiled trying to lighten the mood but when he got no response he stepped next to Iolaus keeping an eye on Joxer. The hunter wasn’t used to Joxer losing his temper or taking a stand over anything and despite the rage he saw in Joxer’s eyes he couldn’t help defending his statement,

 

“I might not have used the best choice of words, but I stand by I said. If Strife was still around, he’d at least have a hand in what’s been happening.” Iolaus kept his eyes fixed on Joxers; he had always thought of Strife as nothing more then Ares lackey but he hadn’t meant to ever let Joxer hear him say it. Even though he had deeply disliked the Mischief God, Joxer’s friendship was important to him.

 

Joxer had always assumed Iolaus was the type of person who liked anyone and always gave them a second chance, whatever their actions, but the dislike that shone from Iolaus’s eyes contradicted that; to see such detest for his former friend, his soon to be son, made Joxer extremely protective and furious. His rage only increased as Hercules tried to play peacemaker and defuse the situation while agreeing with Iolaus.

 

“Joxer you don’t know the God’s like I do. They’re my family much as it pains me to say it and whilst some are harmless, like Aphrodite and Cupid, the rest of them wouldn’t think twice about causing all manner of problems.” The earnestness in Hercules words made Joxer feel like he was getting his first real bout of morning sickness, he couldn’t help laughing at them especially given the harmless comment. 

 

Cupid, harmless? Not likely given the fact he was causing most of the chaos. Aphrodite wasn’t just the ditzy blonde Hercules believed her to be either, it was obvious to Joxer that she’d been manipulating her son for what she believed was his own good as well as making sure Strife was persecuted by the other Gods. The Goddess of Love wasn’t Joxer’s favourite person at present, only Cupid’s anger towards her appeased him slightly. Joxer trembled almost surprising himself over the level of fury he felt. It wasn’t just about the comments on Strife it was Hercules, and Iolaus to some extent, attitude towards the Gods. He couldn’t see how they could be so pig-ignorant over everything and refuse to believe anything other then what their tiny minds could think up. He was firmly set against ever telling the hero or his partner that he was pregnant and that it was with Strife. In fact the whole conversation made him more determined to keep his son away from both them as well as the majority of the Olympians.

 

“I’m a little confused Hercules,” Xena spoke casually but their was no mistaking her attitude it was pure defence, though what she would be defending Joxer wasn’t sure but he enjoyed the way Hercules eyes immediately snapped to her.

 

“Confused?” The hero genuinely looked baffled and Joxer had to admit to feeling just the same. Hercules attitude was clear, what could she possibly be confused over?

 

“Didn’t you help keep Cupid and Psyche together? You even suggested she was made a Goddess didn’t you?” The Warrior Princess’s tone was silky now; “Isn’t she a friend of yours? Only I’m pretty sure you’ve just made it clear you despise most of the Gods.”

 

Joxer stared at her in amazement, having to swallow back his laugh at the stupefied look on Hercules face as Xena continued, “You call Aphrodite your little sister and allow Cupid to call you his favourite Uncle but you seem to have a selective memory when it comes to the rest of your family. I’m not saying some of them aren’t complete asses but it sounds to me like you’re envious of them,” she raised an eyebrow, “And you’re worried that your more like them then you want to be. You make it clear you’ve got godly strength but you seem disgusted by where it came from; you may not like it but you’re a demigod which means that, like me, you have failings on both sides of who you are. The difference is I’m willing to accept mine.”

 

He wasn’t sure how but Joxer managed to hold off cheering Xena as she finished; the incredulous look on Hercules face was hilarious, the demigod looked like he’d just heard something far too complicated for him to conceive. He glanced at Iolaus, the man's face was a picture, and Joxer just wished there were an artist around to capture it. Although he was trying hard not to smile and impressed by Xena’s attitude he wasn’t ready to trust her with his secret yet but he was glad she was adhering to her original attitude; she’d made it clear she wasn’t fond of Strife but had also made it just as clear his death was unnatural and his friends had a right to grieve.

 

Feeling Xena’s hand on his shoulder he locked eyes with her as she spoke, “We should go and see Ares, he can tell us what’s going on. Even though I doubt he’s responsible.” As Joxer turned to walk with her, she added so only he could hear, “I’m not any of the Gods’ friend or defender by any means Joxer but what Iolaus said was unfair. I think you should give him the benefit of the doubt though, he’s not a vindictive person.” She squeezed his arm and glanced back at Hercules and Iolaus who were still too shocked to move, “I agree this is related to the Gods but I don’t share all of Hercules views, I’m well aware the gods can be petty but generally they don’t go against each other.”

 

Joxer nodded musing on her words as he walked; as stubborn and decisive as Xena could be, sometimes she surprised him, “It’s not Ares or Discord,” he murmured, when she glanced at him he quickly added, “I don’t think. It just doesn’t feel like either of them,” he paused thinking over his words, “If that makes any sense.

 

Xena’s mouth twitched slightly, “It does and I stand by what I said before, sometimes Hercules is a legend only in his own mind.”

 

Joxer stared at her for a minute before he burst out laughing, glancing over his shoulder he noticed neither Hercules nor Iolaus had made any effort to catch them up, something that made the walk with Xena a far more pleasant one.

 

A familiar imposing building caught his eye and he inclined his head towards it. It was unmistakably Ares temple; unlike the other temples in the town it had a set of rigid grey steps leading up to its doors and various disgruntled Warlords around it. “Ares temple. Should we just walk in?” Despite his relationship with Ares becoming a little more familiar, Joxer still wasn’t ready to just stroll into his temple and shout for him. The times he had before had been for an extremely good reason or to give tribute and prayers, something he had no inclination to do now.

 

Shrugging Xena strode past the Warlords and up the steps instead of replying; she easily pushed the heavy doors open, “We can try calling him, I doubt Discord will come and I know smashing the place up won’t help.” She held the door open for Joxer as he hesitantly moved up the steps and followed her into the temple. Swallowing hard, he looked around at everything that reminded him of Ares finding it extremely hard to stand around and do nothing especially as Xena started calling Ares name. The whole temple wasn’t just one of Ares temples it was much more though Joxer wasn’t sure what had changed his perspective; everywhere he looked was a reminder of the War God, not that Joxer didn’t expect that in one of his temples but what he didn’t expect was the temple to smell like Ares, almost feel like Ares. He closed his eyes, it felt like the War God was a part of each and everything in the room.

 

“What else did you expect?” The murmur in Joxer’s ear made him jump violently; as he let out a small cry, invisible hands steadied him on either side of his shoulders and Ares appeared behind him in a shower of sparkles. Joxer pulled out of the God’s hold and turned to glare at him as he tried to steady his heartbeat, he was extremely glad that the sparkles from Ares appearance merely graced his skin but didn’t burn.

 

Xena was at Joxer’s side before he had a chance to complain her eyes assessing the God, “Not funny Ares,” her voice was steady but Joxer could tell she wasn’t impressed. Joxer’s heartbeat was returning to normal but his jumpiness was now from his close proximity to Ares. 

 

The War God took it all in his stride and shrugged at them both, “It is my temple,” he reminded them, “and you obviously want me for some reason, so what is it now? Come to start annoying me over some war or another?” His comment was directed solely at Xena although he had moved closer to Joxer; the mortal’s nervousness was apparent and inwardly Ares was delighted that the mortal seemed to want to be bothered.

 

Xena’s eyes narrowed thoughtfully as she took in the tension between Ares and Joxer but before she could casually slide in between the two and protect Joxer from Ares apparent new interest, the doors to the temple crashed open revealing a very disgruntled Hercules who Joxer (rightly) presumed had only just snapped out of his shock. Unconsciously Joxer moved a little closer to Ares, something that escaped everyone’s notice but the God’s, who was glaring at his annoying half-brother.

 

“Ares!” Hercules growled the word out, arrogantly striding towards the War god who was growing angrier by the second; luckily (for his own health) Hercules stopped himself from grabbing Ares by his shirt and merely stood in front of the God, his arms crossed as he glowered at him. 

 

Ares managed to put his homicidal tendencies about his brother briefly to one side and raised an eyebrow at the scowling demigod, “Something wrong Hercules?” his voice was deceptively calm, “Or are you making a habit of barging into other people’s homes?”

 

Hercules scowl deepened but he was at a loss of what to say; his patented ‘you’re evil and behind this!’ speech only worked when Ares was hurling fireballs at him or obviously involved in some nefarious plot; the demigod was a little stumped at how to reply to his brothers comments on his manners. He glanced at Iolaus as the hunter joined his side, having got over his own shock seconds after Hercules had, and then looked back at Ares who was looking from Xena to Joxer with an expression on his face that cried ‘why me?’ Finding his voice Hercules did his best to intimidate his brother, he was so sure Ares and Discord were behind the latest problem’s they’d been experiencing he didn’t even stop to consider if they had actually been affected by them; 

 

“What are you up to now Ares? I can’t see how any of this could accomplish anything for you,” he meant the words sarcastically but a small frown furrowed his forehead as it dawned on him that the chaos that was happening wouldn’t benefit Ares in the slightest. Not liking that thought, Hercules switched to the next guilty person on his list, “Or is Discord so out of your control, she would do this?” the frown only deepened as an amused smile spread across Ares face, “you think that’s funny Ares?”

 

“Actually I do,” Ares smile twitched slightly as his amusement grew, he’d caught the tail end of Hercules thoughts and realised that his brother was more upset about his rowdy behaviour when drunk then any of the Gods problems; he was tempted to tell Hercules that Zeus acted in exactly the same way when he’d had too much wine, but that would only lead to more confrontation and much as he enjoyed Joxer standing so close to him, he still had Strife’s name to clear. Holding up his hands Ares gathered his power as he concentrated on bringing Discord to him, the God found it mildly amusing that as he did Iolaus jumped to one side whilst Hercules took up a defensive stance. A bright green light gathered between his hands as the two tensed further and faded to reveal…a chicken.

 

Unable to hold it in anymore, Joxer burst out laughing as the chicken clucked and warbled in Ares hands. It flapped it’s wings angrily in Hercules direction making the hero back up a few steps; swallowing his laughter Joxer managed to straighten up and ask, “Is that Discord?” At Ares nod he burst out laughing again; a chicken was more then appropriate (in Joxer’s opinion) for a Goddess who bullied her own child.

 

Ares grinned, Joxer’s laughter was extremely infectious; the God could see Xena was trying valiantly to swallow her laughter almost to the point of choking on it and Iolaus looked torn between hysterics and embarrassment for his own presumptions. Hercules looked astounded; his mouth was wide open and he was staring at the chicken in shock, which kept trying to incline it’s head enough to peck him. 

 

“That’s Discord?” The hero asked incredulously as he stared down at the chicken, he noticed had an eerily familiar psychopathic look in its eyes as it tried to peck his hand.

 

Smirking Ares nodded, “What you thought I’d turn her back right away? I quite like her as this, means she can’t get in my way,” his last words were in an icy tone and the chicken stopped flapping and pecking straight away. Ares stared down at her thoughtfully, he was fond of Discord despite her shortcomings; she had abused his nephew and she did anger him greatly a lot of the time but she was still his twin sister, Ares hadn’t turned her back at first because he was furious with her for acting although Strife had meant nothing but now he did it to protect Joxer (even if it was for the wrong reason). If Discord knew Strife had another child before Psyche, one who had no way of protecting himself he was sure she would transfer whatever she felt for Strife onto Joxer and subject him to the same punishments; Ares knew that Joxer, being mortal, wouldn’t survive her attentions. 

 

“But she’s your sister, you lieutenant?” Iolaus looked shocked at the idea, “I thought you were joking when you said you’d keep her like that, that’s just…” he broke off not sure what it was, he disliked Discord as much as he had Strife so he couldn’t defend her.

 

Ares shrugged casually, "she’s stuck like that until someone changes her back and given everyone’s moods that will be for a while. It might also be safer for her to stay like this for now, I know at least one God and two Goddesses that want nothing more then to throttle her.” A slow slightly devious smile came over his face as an idea struck him, “actually Olympus isn’t that safe for her at all especially now I’m so busy so why don’t you watch her.” He sauntered forward and calmly dropped the chicken into Iolaus’s arms, he was surprised that Discord didn’t try to peck Iolaus and just sat glaring at him but he did notice as Hercules moved to take her she pecked him sharply on the hand. 

 

Joxer couldn’t help the idle thought that Hercules wasn’t all that suited to chickens as the hero cursed and rubbed his hand, in fact he was much more suited to something else. He jumped as Ares patted his shoulder in delight as he caught the mortal’s thought, “I almost forgot, chickens aren’t really your thing are they Hercules?” Ares waved his hand and the chicken glowed reforming into a pig; Hercules noticeably took a step back and went slightly green as Discord started snorting and squealing at him the sounds translating, to him, into her furious voice. 

 

Obviously on the verge of laughing Ares somehow managed to still appear intimidating as he looked over the hero, “Don’t forget little brother, she is a Goddess and Zeus’s daughter. You’d better take good care of her.” He spoke casually but meant every word; he had no doubt that Hercules would protect Discord even if she was a Goddess turned pig, ignorant and annoying as he could be Ares knew Hercules would keep her safe, “next time try someone else. I’m a bit busy at the moment and there are plenty of other God’s who are responsible for this mess.” He squeezed Joxer’s upper arm slightly as he addressed him, “I can see you do want bothering, so I’ll be sure to visit…again.” With a final smirk, he flashed out leaving Discord squealing in Iolaus’s arms. 

 

He also left behind Joxer who blushed deeply as the hunter and two confused demigods, one of whom was getting sorer ears by the minute, turned to stare at him in disbelief.

 

 

*******

 

“Why?” The God turned his head briefly as he looked at the other behind him, they were close enough to touch and yet nether made any effort to.

 

“She needs you,” his Fathers voce broached no argument, “So does the rest of your family. By all means stay out of it if you don’t want to help with our Cupid-problem but your Mother needs you right now.” His hand hesitated by the God’s arm and then drew quickly back; glancing down at the object in front of the God, his Father shook his head refraining from touching his son; something the God was glad for and yet deep down hurt badly, his father hadn’t laid a hand on him in years not a hug, not a touch, not nothing. At the God’s silence, his Father flashed out with a final sigh leaving the God alone with his own thoughts.

 

*They’ll never believe it was an accident, * The God mused to himself, *or was it? Sometimes I wonder, * he waved his hand over the seeing pool making Cupid’s image appear; the image rippled briefly and the God watched in curiosity as Asyinnitos appeared next the rampaging Love God. He expected Cupid to turn on the Goddess and take his frustrations out on her especially after she’d cursed him along with everyone else or for the Goddess to start trying to plead with Cupid and apologise; what he never considered was that the Goddess would say something to Cupid that would have him roaring in laughter. The God had expected anger from Cupid, not laughter, the Love God’s attitude mystified him and made him suspicious that something was going on. 

 

The God knew Cupid’s anger and grief had been real which made the God was more then a little confused; the God himself had been one of those to try to comfort Cupid before his grief was bound and yet now those bonds were released it appeared the winged God was involved in some kind of elaborate game, pretending to be more distressed then he was. Of all the Olympians to work on such a sham with Cupid he never would have expected the Goddess of Pregnancy to be involved, they just weren’t connected in anyway and yet she was saying something to Cupid that had his full attention on her. The God frowned, Cupid was no longer laughing but he was listening attentively to whatever the Goddess was saying. The God rested his fingers in the seeing pool as he wished he could hear what they were discussing; he slightly disturbed the image but it remained obvious the two were working together in some manner as they flashed out together. The God traced their signatures back to Cupid’s temple where both Bliss and Psyche were in residence; the seeing pool remained fixed on the spot where Cupid had been, it wasn’t powerful enough to show the inside of a warded temple and Cupid’s temple was warded.

 

The God waited for something to happen as he concentrated on Cupid’s temple, at the very least he expected some kind of confrontation between Cupid and Psyche. When nothing happened after a few minutes the God scowled and ran his hand over the seeing pool, the image blurred and changed to that of Ares- the one person the God was deeply afraid would find out the truth. The God couldn’t understand where Ares sudden need to know the truth had come from and why the God was so persistent with it; he had to assume part of it had come from Asyinnitos and her curse which meant the God would have to deal with her first. He sighed, things were becoming far to complicated to keep up with and he knew the truth was a better option then more deception but he still couldn’t bring himself to do it. Not paying attention to the seeing pool, the God missed Ares brief flirtation with Joxer and the seeing pools fluctuation as it focussed briefly on the mortal.

 

The God knew Cupid and Asyinnitos’ subterfuge would cause problems, more then he might have been able to cope with, but he wasn’t ready to turn his family against him by revealing the truth. He’d had many a sleepless night imagining the horror and guilt on his mothers face as she was confronted by the truth; his father he knew would be disappointed in him, something the God found worse then anything else. Even if he no longer had a proper relationship with him he still yearned to, if his parents knew the truth it would be impossible.

 

He clenched his fists believing that if he admitted what he’d done most if not all of the Pantheon would turn against him despite the deep hurt that had driven him to it and the accident that had resulted causing all the mess. The God could see of no way out and nothing he could do, save watching the others to try to find out what was going on; before the time came for the truth to come out, he was sure he would have to do things that weren’t in his nature. He clenched his fists, if he couldn’t admit to the truth then one way or another he’d have to bury it.


	10. Manipulations

  
Author's notes: Notes: Thanks for checking this for me Jo, you are a star! :)  
  
Disclaimer: Only Assy belongs to me the rest i have no claim over-merely borrow  


* * *

Flinging his blanket from his body, Joxer rolled onto his back; as his arm moved over his face to rest on his eyes, he wished that there were some way to blacken out the bright light from the moon. Covering his face with the blanket hadn’t helped much, even though it was a cool night the blanket was keeping him far too warm besides it was too d scratchy to want to hold over his eyes for long so he was finding it extremely difficult to sleep. It wasn’t that the idea of being pregnant that was keeping him awake or even the nausea that had kept coming and going; the worry that Strife had to be kept safe had played on his mind when he had first found out but it had not affected his sleeping habits too much. Instead it was the scratchy blanket, that grated on his sore chest and the snoring that kept him awake. He sighed and removed his arm from his face, glancing around at his companions. He had no idea how any of them could sleep through the rasping snores but they were driving him crazy, he eyed the Goddess-turned-pig with a glower as she snored and spluttered in apparent contentment. 

 

Why in Tartarus Hercules and Iolaus were still travelling with them, Joxer didn’t know. At first he’d tried every trick he knew of to get them to leave; he couldn’t believe either man couldn’t take the hint. Even Xena’s, ‘well here’s where our ways part’ hadn’t worked; she’d tried it three times and all she got was an animated smile from Iolaus and a glance from Hercules. Personally Joxer believed they were following them as punishment, subjecting them to continual versions of ‘Hercules berates the Gods’ and ‘why God’s didn’t make good friends’ (Hercules wasn’t exactly subtle).

 

A few days before, after listening to Hercules rant at Discord for the fifth time that morning, Xena and Gabrielle had gone off to bathe or get away from Hercules as Joxer personally believed, leaving both Joxer and Iolaus who had decided to do some fishing rather then opt for the more dubious pastime of mediation between a pig and her half-brother. Only one good thing had come about from their time together, both Iolaus and Joxer had come to an understanding about Strife. Joxer hadn’t been keen on spending time alone with Hunter at first, he still remembered Iolaus’ opinion on Strife and his ‘toady’ comment but he wasn’t eager to lose another friend. He was sure once (if ever) his pregnancy was revealed and Strife's rebirth announced, his number of friends would drop down to the more realistic amount of none; or one if he counted himself. 

 

Joxer had hesitantly decided to bring up the issue of Strife but had been slightly surprised when Iolaus had voiced it first. The hunter had been feeling guilty about his reaction to the news that Joxer had been his friends with Strife. Iolaus didn’t normally speak so bluntly or so ill of the dead and he usually bit his tongue for the sake of friendship if nothing else; he’d admitted that listening to Hercules rants about the Mischief God not put him in a good mood in the first place and that he’d been the butt of several of Strife’s more malicious pranks- the first of which he remembered from his teenage years. Listening to him Joxer had had to agree, the other man’s stories didn’t paint Strife in the best light even if he had just been doing what he did best; Iolaus even went so far to admit to Joxer that had Strife kept up his antics he and Hercules may not have remained friends. The strain Strife and Ares had put on them by twisting things between them had almost wrecked their friendship. To Iolaus losing his friendship with Hercules would have been worse then dying. A loud grunt interrupted his musings and Joxer frowned, letting out a loud sigh; if he couldn’t sleep he didn’t see why Hercules should, he was the one who insisted on keeping Discord with him. Joxer had only skipped back a year or so in Strife's dream memories but from those mere glimpses into Discord and Strife’s relationship he was quite happy to let Hercules sell her.

 

Joxer tried rolling onto his stomach but was stopped by the slightly paranoid thought that he could squash baby Strife, so he opted for his side again and tried to pull the itchy blanket around him.

 

“Why do you even bother with that old thing?” the husky voice cut through the silence making Joxer jump violently and twist back onto his back. Letting out a loud yelp he glared at the smirking War God who lay next to him propped up one elbow. Ares offered Joxer an innocent look but it didn’t quite work for him, as Joxer expression remained annoyed. Taking the easy way out and as a peace offering (ironic as that is) Ares ran a hand over the blanket changing Its texture so that even though it appeared the same it was soft and comfortable rather then chafing.

 

The further back into Strife’s memories Joxer had gone the more guilt he had felt over his attraction to Ares, luckily foetus Strife didn’t seem too bothered by his Uncle’s presence or they might have had a few problems. Though Joxer wasn’t entirely sure how much Strife was aware of he knew the foetus recognised something in some of the other Gods; the one time Hercules had dumped the pig-Discord in Joxer’s arms he had felt a tingling run through his arms before the pig screeched land leapt back to Hercules with her tail and hairs standing on end.

 

“Dinah for them?” Joxer glanced at the God whose eyebrows were raised, “Come on now say something, I don’t often visit your campsites,” a slightly amused look crossed Ares face and he added, “At least not for late night visits of this nature.” 

 

Joxer hesitated as he thought over his answer, not wanting to give anything away; he guessed that if the War God knew how close he was to Strife he wouldn’t have been calmly lying next to him. Joxer had to admit he wasn’t sure just what Ares reaction would have been since the relationship between him and Strife had seemed complicated to say the least. Though Ares didn’t appear to be outwardly grieving, Joxer believed Ares at least missed Strife but their last conversation had been too confusing for the mortal to gauge him properly. He settled for the most neutral thing he could find, 

 

“What nature?”

 

The surprise that crossed Ares’ face nearly made Joxer laugh out loud; it was priceless and something he was sure the God would never want anyone to see again. The mortal was still uneasy around Ares especially when he knew he was keeping such a big secret inside him but seeing such a human reaction from a God set him a little more at ease. 

 

It took a moment for the surprised expression to drop from Ares’ face; since the God definitely felt a little off balance whenever he saw Joxer, he secretly hoped the other man felt it too. In truth had it been any other time or place Ares would have shagged the mortal out of his system but between trying to clear Strife’s name and keeping the other Gods from finding out Joxer’s existence he had to settle for taking it slowly. “What do people normally sneak into other peoples campsites for?” he asked softly.

 

Giving him an odd look Joxer counted the reasons off on one hand, “To steal something from them, to spy on them, to kidnap them,” he would have continued if it hadn’t been for the look of sheer incredulity that spread over Ares face.

 

“How about trying to seduce them?” Ares felt like he was getting nowhere fast, he knew Joxer was attracted to him, the other man’s response to their kiss had proven that but the mortal seemed intent on making Ares do all the work; the God could only surmise that it was the mischief in him coming out, he just had no way of knowing how right he was. Catching sight of a strange mark on the underside of Joxer’s wrist he grasped the man’s hand, his fingers tracing the raised skin, “You burned yourself?” 

 

Holding off the urge to shiver at Ares’ touch Joxer nodded his cheeks flushing slightly, “Tripped over yesterday when we stopped to get Argo shoed,” he answered shyly, “I wasn’t paying attention so I fell over one of the buckets and burnt my hand on the metal.” He wasn’t sure how Ares had noticed, though the moon was bright and high the burn was almost completely healed which Joxer had guessed was Strife’s influence; the mortal had never healed as fast in his life, he’d had numerous burns, cuts and scrapes to compare with. Joxer guessed it was a God thing and was grateful and slightly proud that his baby-to-be was trying to protect him as much as he aimed to protect baby Strife; at least now the man knew where his sudden co-ordination had come from, he just hoped it remained after Strife was born. It would be handy in protecting the Godling. 

 

He froze suddenly as he realised what he’d just been thinking off, *Just how is he meant to be born?* Joxer eyes trailed down his body to his stomach as panic started to rise within him. Where was the baby growing? Would he grow like a normal baby and how would he get out?

 

Luckily Ares was too busy examining Joxer’s wrist to notice the panic on his face; Ares was deep in thought wondering how Joxer had healed so fast, it was only after a minute or so the God decided he must have just overlooked Joxer’s natural abilities in the past. He’d actually overlooked Joxer a lot in the past, which was something Ares, had every intention of rectifying. A screechy summons cut through Ares’ mind and he closed his eyes, placing it and grimacing; much as Ares was enjoying phase One of his ‘seduce Joxer’ plan, he was already late meeting the fates and the Goddesses were definitely not happy about it. Naturally elusive and mysterious they rarely granted appointments on short notice and when kept waiting they were not appreciative. 

 

“I’ll be bothering you again soon,” catching Joxer’s chin with his hand, Ares leant forward and kissed the man softly on his lips; it was only a brief kiss but it left Ares wanting more and when he leant back he was satisfied to see the startled expression on Joxer’s face before he flashed out. 

 

Joxer had been astonished by the kiss but only because he’d been so close to overwhelming panic that it had been completely unexpected. The bright light from Ares exit made him blink black spots and he touched his lips briefly all thoughts of anything but the War God suppressed in his mind. Lying back down on his side he hoped sleep was soon forthcoming. 

 

********

 

 

First an intervention for Cupid, then a summit, every Deity present could see Ares was obviously not wasting anytime at clearing Strife’s name; the only oddity to the proceedings was that whilst practically every god and goddess on Olympus was in attendance save Zeus and Hera (who were always late), Ares himself was missing. 

 

The fact that they’d been waiting for an annoyingly long amount of time seemed to be wearing thin on some of the Gods nerves and they’d taken to either calling for Ares (Athena), glaring at Asyinnitos (Aphrodite) or trying to brainstorm exactly how Ares was going to clear the deceased mischief God’s name. This was all except for one God who was using the meeting as an opportunity to manipulate.

 

“You know you could always come to my temple for dinner and we could…discuss this further,” Apollo’s voice was a purr as he stroked Asyinnitos’ arm causing her to stiffen more in nervousness then fear. His attempts at seduction were having the opposite effect on the younger Goddess though Apollo seemed completely oblivious to her rising panic, he’d convinced himself her slight trembling was her awe at being the centre of his affections, he never considered otherwise. Despite what Asyinnitos’ Godhood stood for she was very naïve when it came to things of a sexual nature and Apollo’s exaggerated flirtations were alarming her. It wasn’t as if Asyinnitos was afraid of Apollo she wasn’t used to be so closely confined to any other member of the pantheon, especially him; she was, despite her naivete, not ignorant of his true intentions and so whilst she was slowly backing up away from him she was growing more annoyed at his attempts to woo her. 

 

“I’m not removing the curse,” her voice held firm despite the tremble within her, she crossed her arms over her chest her eyes darting around in the hope that her Mother had arrived, “It stays Apollo, get used to the side affects.” Asyinnitos wasn’t sure what response she was expecting but it definitely wasn’t for him to move in closer forcing her to back up against the temple wall, his arm casually looping over her shoulder as he used his most flirtatious smiles on her apparently not used to anyone turning him down. 

 

“But think of the benefits babe. Me, you, dinner and wine; think how much more fun it could be if you took it off even for the night,” Apollo’s smile grew but Asyinnitos could see the desperation in his eyes, the being barren wasn’t bothering him but the impotence side effect was. She was about to open her mouth and tell him something she knew would have him running from her when he rapidly backed off, straightening up and appearing chagrined; in bewilderment she followed his eyeline and caught sight of Ares, considering her last encounter with him Asyinnitos was surprised to see the cool glower he had levelled at Apollo. It should have relieved her instead it made her more uncomfortable about the War God’s intentions; though Ares seemed to accept her curse more readily then the other Gods and had been civil, to the point of amused, with her so far she was still unsure why. She had caught a few brief glimpses of his personality to reassure her that Ares genuinely missed Strife and wanted him back but it was hard to wipe clean the tarnishing memories of him she’d witnessed from foetus-Strife. 

 

Ares made no attempt to walk over to her and merely eased himself into a chair whilst he waited for Zeus to arrive; in fact he ignored the other Deities questions as they surrounded him trying to discover what he had unearthed in such a short time.

 

No matter how minor a Deity or how busy they claimed to be they were in attendance, Zeus and Hera’s backing Ares on the whole matter of clearing Strife’s death had seen to that; only Bliss and Psyche was excused since Cupid didn’t want his Wife put through the trauma of what learning about her conception and Bliss was too young. Even the God who desperately didn’t want to be in attendance had no choice but to be; he was keeping up the pretence of listening to his siblings whilst fervently trying to appear excited by what Ares would say despite his deep fear and dread. 

 

Tuning out what his older, more opinionated, siblings were saying the God focussed on his own inner misery and guilt. Whilst he was sure Ares wasn’t close enough yet to reveal why Strife fathered Psyche, the young God was sure such a meeting would not have be called unless something big had been found; he knew for certain if the War God had found out what had truly transpired, he would have been blasted into oblivion before a meeting could even take place. The God shuddered inwardly at the thought; oblivion terrified him though he had to admit he would welcome it more then his family disowning him. Whatever problems they had, however much his parents continual rejection hurt him, betraying his own family would only turn them all against him. 

 

At least he had one consolation, Ares was so fixated on clearing Strife’s name and finding out who was responsible he had forgotten to overlook the one thing that could have revealed the God in question- the how. It was the one thing that could bring anything crashing about him though luckily the thought had not yet occurred to Ares. The young God shifted growing more worried as time wore on, he was barely paying attention to his siblings now but luckily they were fixated on talking to their mother about the curse. That was one topic of conversation that made the God smirk inwardly and his eyes drifted over to focus on its caster- Asyinnitos. Not that she was in anyway aware of his attention on her; she was having her own problems fending off the unwelcome and obviously annoying attentions of Apollo.

 

Crossing his arms over his chest he was unaware that, to his parents, it appeared as though he was just annoyed as them over the cursing and was focussing on the Goddess for that reason. In actuality he was contemplating her part in it all; the God had to admit it was a good curse, very effective to all who had wronged Strife even encompassing the caster herself. The one flaw in it was it didn’t punish him. The one God at the root of it all was unaffected by it. It was the one thing the guilty God could silently laugh over because it wouldn’t give him away, he wasn’t immune or able to block it the answer was far more simple- the young God was sterile; unable to conceive within him, as arduous a task as it could be for a male God, it was possible and unable to impregnate another be it mortal or God. Not only that but he suspected that he and Asyinnitos appeared to have one thing common, though he was guessed he was up on her by the one night of passion he had; whilst the God would miss pleasuring himself he could live with it and fake doing it to divert suspicion from himself.

 

Of all the Gods present he knew he was the least under suspicion; appearing not only so close to Cupid and overlooked for having no motive he should have been less worried. And yet he wasn’t. Instead he felt like he was running out of time. Should Ares chose to start asking ‘how’ the guilty God would be in deep trouble, his reasons for ‘why’ would seem unimportant to all the others; when they discovered he hadn’t tricked Strife or coerced him but had merely used his own powers and a potion to take his form for the night they never believe it wasn’t for malicious reasons. Or that he had no way of knowing that, by taking Strife’s form he was no longer infertile and would impregnate his lover with the mischief God’s essence; he’d had no way of knowing the potion was that good until after Psyche had been conceived and it had been to late to hide his mistake. He clenched his fists inwardly screaming at his own stupidity and so almost missed Ares arrival, one thing he did catch was the interchange between Asyinnitos and Ares. He couldn’t understand why the two were, if not working together, at least sharing information from what he could see. His eyes narrowed on the Goddess as his panic rose, she had been the one to suggest to Ares that Strife hadn’t fathered Psyche; she had been the one to place the curse that had sparked so much interest in Strife. It was easier to blame her then himself, any of the other many Deities that had wronged Strife or Cupid whose instability had caused the intervention. Though they were distantly related he found it easier to become enraged by her involvement than his direct families, out of all of them he couldn’t take the risk that she would suggest anything else to Ares. Betraying his family was what he had already done, it was too late to redeem that mistake he could only hide it, try to bury it in the past along with everyone else that got in the way.

 

 

The noise within the temple was almost deafening as many of the God’s and Goddesses did their best to manipulate, cajole and guilt Ares into revealing what he knew. Only two Deities were not clamouring for the gossip; Asyinnitos, who used the opportunity to flash down to Joxer, and the one God responsible for starting off the chaos, was sitting panicking inwardly until he noticed the young Goddess flash out and silently followed her.

 

***

 

 

Joxer shifted within the blanket trying to find some part of the ground that was comfortable, he stared up at the night sky groaning inwardly as he realised it would be morning in less then a few hours and he still hadn’t been able to sleep. He hadn’t thought sleep would be more forthcoming after Ares visit but had had to try to relax. The problem was the more he thought about trying to sleep, the less it happened and the more secret worry infiltrated his mind. He was now so focussed on his worries that every little problem or ache was seen as an unusual side effect to his pregnancy. *My pregnancy* That thought itself was something Joxer was having trouble comprehending, at first he’d written it off as a Godly miracle now he was wondering how far the miracle stretched, he kept rubbing his stomach attempting to ease the slight ache he felt in the lower region; his latest paranoid delusion had been that perhaps baby Strife was going to emerge any second without warning and was pushing his way out. The only thing that stopped Joxer hyperventilating and becoming hysterical was the images of Strife he’d been shown. The baby in those images was far too small and unready to be out of the womb. 

 

A muted flash caught his attention as Asyinnitos appeared next to him looking more harassed and fatigued then he’d seen her before. She glanced around briefly before sitting down, cross legged, next to him her toga modestly arranged over her legs, “You’re worried.” She smiled as she spoke but Joxer could see a slight anxiety there as if she was afraid he would change his mind.

 

Sitting up, he shook his head and then nodded slightly, “not that worried,” he spoke softly to reassure her, “just wondered how and when Strife will come out.” He hesitated, “I mean you dropped this bombshell on me and I haven’t seen you in fourteen days!” his voice was rising slightly and he had to fight it down in case he awoke on of the others. 

 

Asyinnitos laid a hand on his arm, “Don’t hold back Joxer you can rant if you wish. I can sense Ares has been here and his illusions and silencers are still in effect so be as loud as you wish,” she looked guilty though not as guilty as she felt; she’d been so busy throwing people’s suspicions off and allying with Cupid that she’d forgotten how much Joxer had to be stressing. She was surprised he hadn’t gone into full-blown hysteria, forgetting he hadn’t the answers and knowledge the God’s were born with she’d almost abandoned him to that worry. 

 

Joxer blinked slightly nonplussed that she didn’t mind him yelling at her, that calmed him more then anything else could, “Okay,” he worried his lip, “I just need some time, I need to know what’s going to happen and not just with me. With Strife too, my body and his body and how this whole birth thing will work.” He sighed, “You have no idea how close I’ve been to blurting this out to Xena, the only thing holding me back is Discord,” he gestured to the sleeping pig, “And Hercules reaction. I just don’t want anything to happen to Strife, what I’ve seen…it wasn’t nice. His life wasn’t nice. I don’t want to ruin it all again by accidentally doing something wrong.”

 

 

Closing her eyes the Goddess berated herself for not seeing this sooner and not explaining to Joxer, “You won’t do anything wrong Joxer, trust me. Strife didn’t just choose you because you were the closest to him, given his life history I seriously doubt he would have chosen anyone else. If you hadn’t been there…” she trailed off watching comprehension flood Joxer’s face, “This didn’t just happen for convenience Joxer, Strife didn’t just pick the nearest incubator. He was ready to give up until he felt you, you were the only thing that kept him going and you’re one thing keeping him safe right now. You won’t mess it up.” 

 

Hearing her earnest words Joxer didn’t have to look at her to hear the truth behind them, his hand roamed down to his belly to rest over the place he’d felt the stretching, “He did huh?” A smile lit up on his face and he looked at her seeing the same smile on her own.

 

A slightly tingle interrupted Asyinnitos focus and she concentrated following it back to it’s source, “Oh Tartarus!” She stood up quickly, “I’m sorry Joxer all of us are supposed to be at a summit, if I’m not there they will send someone after me.” Agitated she ran her fingers through her hair, “Here, I have an idea,” she ran her hand over Joxer’s head and he felt a calming wave sweep through him, “This shouldn’t take long and I promise you I’ll be back tomorrow. I’m sure Cupid or Psyche can help me out with a distraction for your friends so we can talk about this.”

 

Joxer could hardly nod, the relaxed feeling was spreading and all he wanted to do was sleep; he barely had time to lie down before he was in a deep sleep, restful sleep. He never noticed Asyinnitos flash out or the slight glimmer hailing the emergence of another God, which appeared after she left. The one God that was also not at the summit was the one who had followed Asyinnitos to Greece and who had allowed himself to become visible after the Goddesses departure.

 

An unusual, almost cruel, smile lit up the God’s face as he surveyed the sleeping man; he had no idea Joxer was in anyway linked to Strife but he was obviously special to Asyinnitos which gave the God the leverage he needed in case she interfered again. His eyes assessed Joxer as he bent down next to him, he moved to touch the mortal but before his fingers made contact the shrill voice of his mother sounded in his mind and with a curse he flashed back to the summit keeping the thought of leverage in mind.


	11. Painfull truths and memories

  
Author's notes: Warnings:mpreg, possibly ucky scene  
  
Notes: Big thanks and hugs to Hallie for betaing for me :)  
  


* * *

Appearing the embodiment of casual, Ares rested one ankle atop his other knee and ignored the growing drone around him. The hundred and one questions still hadn’t ceased but the expression of cool detachment on the War God’s face had convinced the other Deities to address each other rather then bother him. To each of the Gods and Goddesses present Ares appeared to be completely in thought and totally unapproachable, in truth he was mulling over the cryptic clues the Fates had given him whilst coolly assessing each of the Deities present to see who the clues could possibly apply to. 

 

 

Having discounted most of the more distantly related Gods, Ares was now focussing on those directly related to Cupid and those affected by Asyinnitos curse; he suspected that they were the most connected to ‘the chaotic mess’ that the Fates had spoken of. He shifted slightly sensing a deep hum in the air and a hush came over the entire congregation as a deep purple flash lit up in the centre of the room which quickly formed into Zeus and Hera. Not a word was spoken as Zeus offered Hera his arm and the two regally walked to the front of the room, leaving the other Gods to hastily arrange their seating positions. Ares could sense, rather then hear a buzz of mental conversation no doubt centred on Zeus and Hera’s entrance. It was rare, almost unseen for some of the younger Gods, for the King and Queen of the Gods to appear united on anything. It didn’t matter that Hera was backing Ares because she agreed with finding out the truth about Strife whereas Zeus was backing her for a hassle free life and because he was more inclined for the curse to be lifted then finding out what injustices had been done to Strife. The two were obviously united in their cause to back Ares or they would not have agreed to the Forum and arrived together.

 

Ares smirked as they passed drawing a brief smile from Hera and eliciting several uneasy looks from those around him. A brief flare of power at the back of the room had Ares scanning it briefly rather then crassly turning around to gawk at the latecomer; realising the latecomer was Asyinnitos he briefly toyed with the idea of telepathically reminding her that arriving after Zeus generally put the King in a bad mood, one which even Hera would find difficult to shift him out of despite her ability to persuade him. A second less powerful flare of power caught his attention as he sensed the arrival of a late-coming God and this time he did briefly shift and eye the tardy one. It took a second or two for Ares to place the Godling but he immediately dismissed him once he had; the God in question was extremely young by their standards, less then a century in fact and judging from the uneasiness on his face he’d obviously been doing something he shouldn’t. As the Godling settled between his mother and siblings throwing Asyinnitos a quick glance, Ares guessed the youngster had been trying to get the curse lifted; though the War God seriously doubted the Godling would be on the receiving end himself, he knew how attached the child had been to Cupid especially when he was young and suspected he’d had a hand in getting the Love and Mischief God’s together in the first place. As Ares eyes flicked back to Zeus and he prepared to speak to the Pantheon it never once occurred to him that the young God in question would have also been the one to split them apart.

 

“Thank you all for attending,” although Zeus’ words were gracious his tone implied that there was no way in which any of them could have refused, “As you all know there has been some debate following the death of Strife, our God of Mischief.” For once the slightly self centred God was focussed on someone other then himself and as his eyes swept his audience, they could see his commitment. “I’m going to turn this Forum over to my son in a moment but be advised he has both myself,” he glanced down at Hera who had sat down on her throne, “and my wife’s backing on any matters that may arise here. That includes any crimes or misdemeanours relating to Strife and the punishments to be handed out.” The King’s eyes scanned the room, fixing on Asyinnitos and Adrasteia who sat beside her daughter and he continued, “Some punishments have already been dealt out and will not be revoked as yet.”

 

As angry mutterings swept through the crowd Zeus boomed out, “Any threats or bribery affected upon those who have dealt out these punishments shall be met with severity by myself.” 

 

Though the mutterings ceased the Gods expressions ranged from shocked (Aphrodite), angry (Athena) and accepting (Cupid); even Asyinnitos seemed surprised by his words, she’d not expected Zeus to take the matter as seriously and she was quite surprised when his eyes softened as he looked at her and continued his speech. “Only Gaia and Eris are not included today; Eris is erstwhile engaged and Gaia doesn’t wish to join us, it appears she is more then slightly annoyed at our behaviour.” The brief flare of colour lighting his face made everyone there present sure that Gaia had given Zeus a few choice words on the matter. 

 

“Whatever the outcome of this forum be aware that serious repercussions will be in order for those who ostracised Strife or took it upon themselves to dole out their own justice.”

 

Ares noticed several of the Gods pale at Zeus’ words and those not already on his mental list were added. Ares noticed Aphrodite try to sink lower into her chair as Zeus’ eyes scanned over her but as they passed a sulky pout settled over her features. Although Cupid was sitting as far away from her as possible and was only slightly closer to Ares she seemed unconcerned by the Forum and Cupid’s distance. Not only were most of Aphrodite’s other children congregated around her in a show of support they were making it clear they were not impressed with anyone going against her; Deimos and Phobos were very obviously glaring, trying to look as threatening as possible towards Asyinnitos who leant so close to Adrasteia that she was almost on her mothers lap. The twins reception to Ares had been cooler then usual but they had long ago accepted that, despite their fury, Ares still considered Strife his nephew so they weren’t that surprised that Ares was willing to consider the Forum; but that he would head it and now actively support Strife’s possible innocence didn’t sit well with them. 

 

Only Anteros sat close to Cupid, actively supporting his brother, his body language towards Aphrodite making it clear that he defended Cupid in favour of her. Cupid was a little paler then normal and definitely grimmer but at least he was sitting quietly, preparing to listen to what Zeus had to say. Out of all the Deity’s present he was the only one Zeus had given permission not to attend; Cupid was also the one who wanted to attend the most. 

 

Ares watched Cupid as Zeus kept up the long winded, politely phrased threats; the War God was glad his son seemed calmer and more at peace then he had decades before; Ares personally believed that had Cupid been given more of a chance to vent after Strife’s apparent betrayal then Cupid may have been able to naturally move on. Ares had supported forcing him to get on with his life but not altering it to such an extent. The only good thing that had come out of the whole mess had been Bliss; Ares was extremely fond of his youngest grandson although he’d only seen him a handful of times. Despite, or maybe even because, of Aphrodite’s mind-messing Cupid had been a very rare visitor to Ares temples, especially the one on Olympus, and he’d never brought Bliss with him. Ares had only properly met his grandson once, when Psyche had desperately needed a babysitter and he’d spent nearly an hour with the boy before Cupid had picked him up; that had been before Bliss had been even able to recognise him. Ares hoped that he hadn’t burned all his bridges with Cupid and that he could spend as much time with his eldest child as he did with any of the others. Cupid must have sensed eyes upon him because he turned to stare at his Father; as Cupid’s frown smothered out and he offered Ares the tiniest nod in recognition, the War God felt the bridges remaking. 

 

“And now I turn you over to Ares,” 

 

Having tuned out most of Zeus long winded introduction Ares almost missed his opening, almost; the God stood up quickly but not fast enough to draw attention, at least not the wrong kind of attention anyway. Striding to the front of the room and making sure to glower at every God looking his way as he passed, Ares reached the front and nodded to Zeus in politeness as the King of the Gods settled down in his throne next to Hera.

 

Ares looked out at the mass of Gods in front of him, his glower fading into seriousness as he spoke; “as most of you have heard and disputed I am sure, I believe that Strife, my nephew and ex-mischief God was unjustly punished, shamed and almost disowned by most of this Pantheon. None of you may like these accusations and most of you may believe they’re unfair but I have every intention of clearing Strife’s name and making all of you realise what you’ve also done.” 

 

Crossing his arms over his chest he aimed another glare at Deimos and Phobos as he sensed their mental communication. Ares had to keep up the formalities to keep his temper in check; already he could sense other mental conversations taking place and he was finding it increasingly difficult to hold back. 

 

“I use the word also because none of us, including myself, are innocent in this; Strife merely committed something many of us in this room are guilty of," his eye caught Aphrodite's, who blushed, and Apollo's who was notorious for seducing mortal spouses; he was tempted to turn around and eye Zeus but the temptation was outweighed by the need for his fathers backing. “At least that’s what we all believed, myself included. But I’m sure we were wrong,” 

 

Ares took a deep breath, “I won’t defend Strife or his actions by justifying that he wasn’t that kind of God because most of you didn’t know him, myself included; but there’s one God in here who can truly say if there’s a chance Strife could have been innocent.” Ares locked eyes with Cupid, “and if he believes there was no chance of that we’ll end this now, no matter what.” Ares kept his eyes trained on Cupid, willing his son to get up and speak; he needed Cupid’s backing too especially after the things the Fates had revealed to him.

 

Cupid had gone a sickly white that only lightened as the other Deities, catching Ares eyeline, turned to stare at him. A hundred and one things raced through the Love God’s mind as he stared up at Ares but only the question cut through them demanding Cupid’s attention; dry mouthed and swallowing hard to hold back his pain, Cupid focussed only on Strife and his ex-lovers possibility of rebirth, he had to answer honestly despite the pain and guilt it brought,

 

“Yes there’s a chance.”

 

*Way to go son,* Ares thought noting the strength it had taken for Cupid to answer his question and proud that Cupid had managed. As Anteros reached out inconspicuously to grasp his brother’s hand in support Ares noticed the tiny shaky smile on Cupid’s face. It wasn’t recovery but it was a start, Ares hadn’t seen that smile no matter how small for a long time. It pleased him to know at least two of his sons were there for each other, the glance Cupid shot him gave him renewed hope that all his bridges were not burned; it was a combination of anger, acceptance and thanks.

 

Noticing the din sweeping the room Ares forwent diplomacy to palm a deep red fireball which he flung at the wall behind the assembled Gods. The explosive sound it made as it hit had those nearest it jumping up and shrieking but luckily being Olympus and Zeus’s Hall, the wall was undamaged apart from a little singeing. Ares was unsure if it was the expression of irritation showing clearly on his face which had all those assembled quieting, or the other fireball he tossed lazily up and down in his free hand; either one worked like a charm and at a slight mental nudge from Hera, Ares reluctantly dissolved the fireball. 

 

“So Cupid agrees, the one person apparently betrayed by Strife actually believes he could be innocent too.” Ares noted that some of his assembled relatives were starting to look a little uneasy and exchanging glances as he continued, “I held this forum as more as an introduction, a formal way to let you all know- you’re all in trouble,” Ares glanced over at Hestia and Hecate who were both raising eyebrows at him, “well most of you. From now on I’ll be reviewing every inch of Strife’s life, from his death backward in order to find anyone who mistreated him. Those who did will be subjected to justice dolled out by myself… Zeus and Hera.” The second part was clearly said as an afterthought but the two divinities’s merely stiffened slightly, “and you might want to plea your case to them before I review Strife’s life and find it, remember some of you have already been identified courtesy of one of our own.” Ares shot a smirk towards Asyinnitos but it was an impressed smirk, “that particular punishment stands, regardless.” He caught the small smile the tiny Goddess threw at him as she relaxed away from her mother.

 

Ares could sense the anger in the room and despite Zeus’s backing he was sure a bloodbath would erupt soon; Athena looked like she was about to spit fire and even some of the most mild tempered Gods were clenching their fists. Aphrodite looked like she could emasculate Ares on the spot and even the minor, and unlikely to be involved, Godlings were feeling the tension and mentally sniping at each other. Which meant it was time to bring out the big swords; the one thing that would have them all accepting, however grudgingly, what had to be done.

 

“And the Fate’s have witnessed and agreed.” Ares words may have been spoken at their normal volume but the weight they held brought about a great hush (mental and otherwise) and had the group paused in their thoughts. Only Zeus and Hera remained unaffected, since both had expected Ares to have found a way to get every God’s immediate acquiescence; Hera, because she knew her son had always been stubborn and had a trick up his sleeve and Zeus…because the elder God hadn’t wanted to be surprised and followed him. 

 

After a moment of silence in which Ares delightedly watched horror dawn across the faces of his ashen family, he explained; “They were cryptic as always but also surprisingly clear. His isn’t the only sin we have to ashamed of; according to them there have been a multitude of offences, starting long before Strife. Strife’s death has given them a reason to interfere as directly as possible rather then just guide us.” Ares took a deep breath as he delivered his next words; “Strife’s thread of life is missing, hidden somewhere in the tapestry, maybe even…erased.” The words were difficult as regret hit him, “Which confirms what Hades found, that Strife’s soul is gone.”

 

Ares could feel the horror mounting, even Aphrodite was starting to look ill at the thought of complete annihilation; Ares guessed it was probably more at the possibility of it rather then Strife’s death but at least he was getting a reaction. Hades had already warned Ares that several of the Gods believed Strife’s shade to be hidden in the Underworld under Hades protection; it angered Ares to think Strife was possibly lucky to have his soul destroyed then ending up as a constant whipping boy to those who still wanted to avenge Cupid- it enraged Ares more to think that, in life he had treated Strife like that. 

 

“They are prepared to help me go over every inch of Strife’s life and find out where we went wrong,” Ares tone brooked no argument and several of the older God’s looked shamefacedly at their own neglected offspring, “and to find out how in Tartarus, Psyche was conceived.” Ares knew they’d be comments at that statement so he quickly added his next surprise, one that had shocked even him, “the Fates have examined Psyche’s thread; whilst they believe she and Bliss were once woven from Strife’s they believe there is some strangeness in the pattern; although Psyche undoubtedly is of Strife, the thread suggests that is not where she came from.” 

 

As chaos erupted all around him Ares couldn’t help but smirk, somewhat satisfied at the reaction as Zeus stood up frantically trying to restore order and grant a recess. The War God was determined to find out who was responsible for Psyches conception and punish them and those who’d enjoyed or used the fallout from it. 

 

Only Asyinnitos smiled in the growing discord as the Goddess, often referred to as ‘mother nature’, voice echoed softly in her mind, *he can be a bit of a windbag child but finally he’s actually taking some action and not being all bluster so try to concentrate. Just don’t let any of them intimidate you when Ares calls for you; since you have time now come to see me; I’d like to meet young Joxer soon and I want to talk to you properly before I do.* Still smiling Asyinnitos caught Ares eyes and nodded briefly before making her excuses to Adrasteia and flashing directly to Gaia; the young Goddess wasn’t one to disrespect her great-grandmother especially when it involved her favourite charges.

 

Unfortunately neither the raucous nor even his own deep-seated worry distracted one other God. The young God in question saw the God of War’s apparent smugness and caught the brief smiles between Ares and Asyinnitos before she flashed out; tracing her journey the young God cursed silently as he lost her position until he quickly realised how precarious a position Asyinnitos had left Joxer in. Since the entire Pantheon was working themselves up into frenzies and the Goddess herself was stupidly distracted, he decided it was the perfect opportunity to slip away and use his leverage. A cruel and ugly grin crossed his features as he flashed out, honing in on the unprotected mortal.

 

**********

 

Another worried Godling in Greece unhappily twisted and turned as more memories were released; baby Strife, as if picking up on the vibes from Olympus, had been brought out of his deep sleep and was drumming his feet against Joxer’s stomach. The baby was far too small for the mortal to feel anything other then a light fluttering in his belly but Joxer was certainly sharing in Strife’s anxiety as the foetal-God’s memories pulled him out of his deep sleep and into pain. The transition into Strife’s memories was a rough one as Joxer was suddenly an unhappy witness and victim to the past. 

 

Joxer bit back screams as he felt the skin from his back break under the expert handling of a dagger. He wasn’t sure how he knew what had cut his back or why Strife should know but the blinding pain that followed thrust all thoughts from his mind; as slim fingers were pushed into the cut peeling the skin back easily his instinctive reaction to retch took over and he bucked, biting down hard on his lip to avoid vomiting. Trying to pull leaden arms towards him, Joxer realised something was holding him down, pinning him to the cold surface he felt below. The mortal wished he could turn his head but once more his body wouldn’t obey his commands and Joxer realised that what he had thought to be a terrible nightmare was actually another dream memory. Smooth fingers danced across Joxer’s back tauntingly and moved around the cut in a show of false-comfort before the nails slipped under his skin; inwardly screaming Joxer prayed to ever Divinity he could name for the excruciating pain to end as another segment of skin was peeled slowly from his back but all his body did was yank on it’s bindings. Knowing he couldn’t take much more and wishing Strife couldn’t and would pass out, Joxer screamed inwardly letting loose the howls he knew Strife was trying to repress; each time a strip was torn and his back massaged he echoed the inner screams he could hear from Strife’s mind. 

 

Joxer wished he could have control for a moment though he knew it would make no difference if he had; the bindings were too tight, the torture too incapacitating. All he could do was experience the blistering agony Strife had been subject to, the Mischief God’s punishment for something he hadn’t been guilty of, and try to block it out as ridiculous a notion as it was. Too exhausted to scream Joxer felt new agony as something bitter invaded his senses, covering his back, and Strife’s body finally let loose with the God’s unwilling screams. Only a muted flash came in answer to Strife’s calls for help which Joxer could barely see, the identity of the Deity was hidden from him as his tormentor stilled and Strife’s body trembled on the Altar it rested on. Joxer could feel Strife frantically trying to regain control of his body and suppress the pain he felt but Joxer fought against experiencing it to listen to the soft conversation he could hear in the background. 

 

Barely having heard the words, “worthless” and “deserves it” Joxer felt the bindings around Strife’s body release and he slumped onto the cold marble, the God too weak to flash away and hide. It was only when the chill had permeated his entire being that Joxer realised the voices, and indeed all the Deity’s, were gone leaving Strife’s abused body bleeding atop the Altar. Joxer was too tired to fight against the cold, too hurt to even be sickened by the callous torture and abandonment of the other Gods; he was almost ready to surrender just as Strife had been over a decade before. Luckily unlike Strife who’d been left for weeks to heal on his own, Joxer was rapidly pulled into another memory one more then pleasant in comparison. 

 

The cold sensation vanished in an instant to be replaced by a hot flush which seemed extremely familiar as did the shudders that followed, wracking his body; Joxer strained to see in the deep red darkness ahead of him as a thin slit of light opened to rapidly reveal light. He tried to mentally blink back the bright colours that assaulted him as he attempted to focus. Joxer wasn’t sure whether he was embarrassed or relieved to realise the apparent darkness was only because Strife’s eyes had been closed but both emotions quickly gave way to complete shock as he realised where he was and who he was with. Had Joxer been in his own body, his face would have been blood-red and not merely wearing the satisfied smirk he could feel upon it; he was also sure had he been in his own body the God of Love would not have been firmly nestled between his legs smirking back at him. Joxer wanted to close his eyes at the sight before him; not because naked Cupid was in any way bad to look at, in fact the God was even more handsome then the last time Joxer had seen him but this time he was definitely seeing a bit too much of him. The man wasn’t entirely sure he would be able to look Cupid in the eye again without thinking back to the image of the hot and smirking God. This definitely didn’t bode well for his relationship with Ares especially if the God read his mind.

 

Only the almost innocent kiss Cupid bestowed upon Strife’s waning erection snapped Joxer out of his silent panic, *Oh Gods please don’t say I’m about to experience sex with Cupid,* he whimpered mentally at the thought. Gorgeous as Cupid was, Strife’s obviously love for him and Joxer’s last dream experience had him cringing away; even if it only was mental cringing since Strife’s body was already recovering and preparing itself for more pleasure, luckily the Love God had other ideas as he laughed and crawled up Strife’s body settling beside him. 

 

Cupid’s laughter relaxed Joxer, despite the God’s closeness to him; the closeness didn’t feel awkward or embarrassing in fact it felt…nice. More then nice in fact, Joxer could feel security, love and lust all wrapped up together which made him feel dizzy and almost overwhelmed; it was so strong and passionate, not a single uneasy or negative emotion flittered across Joxer’s consciousness, just an all encompassing feeling of content. He jumped slightly as Cupid pressed against his, or rather Strife’s body and had to remind himself that he was merely a watcher in the dream not a participant. It saddened Joxer to realise that these feelings had been absent for so long for Strife, that the pain and bitterness Joxer had felt in every memory had enveloped his friend instead. The mortal wished he was back in his own body so he could wrap his arms around the growing foetus inside him and comfort him; he knew baby Strife wouldn’t remember and couldn’t understand the memories he showed Joxer but that Strife had been put through such torment and lost something so precious to him both pained and enraged Joxer. That in turn made him more determined to protect his gestating friend even if he couldn’t retaliate against those who had harmed him.

 

A soft kiss to his lips distracted him and Joxer groaned silently as Cupid gently kissed his lips again, teasing them apart with his tongue; the mortals mental mantra of, *not my body, Strife’s body* began and only intensified as the Mischief God’s body responded and Joxer felt his arm, Strife’s arm, lace around Cupid’s neck as the two God’s deepened their kiss. Surprisingly enough Cupid was the first to break the kiss and Joxer found himself staring into his deep green eyes as a slow jubilant smile lit across his face.

 

“I won, your turn first,” Cupid sounded more ecstatic then smug about it and as Joxer tried to guess what he meant, Cupid pressed one hand against Joxer’s belly pulling him closer as he did. Joxer felt the faked pout upon Strife’s lips only seconds before Cupid kissed it away again and cuddled against him. Still trying to guess what Cupid could have meant and not coming up with much from the other jumbled dream memories, Joxer’s mind could only focus on the current memory when his body shifted slightly of its own accord to curl around Cupids.

 

“Ya think we should start nah? Or wait till its tah late for ‘em tah stop?” Joxer felt the soft words come out of his mouth but despite Strife’s sarcastic tone he could sense that the issue, whatever it was, was deeply bothering the God. 

 

“They wouldn’t try and stop us Strife, trust me,” Cupid’s tone was equally as soft but his voice was unshakeably firm; as Joxer looked into his eyes he felt his own inner furies about the God fade, however Cupid had reacted after Psyches conception it was obvious the God loved Strife. It was also glaringly obvious to Joxer that Cupid was trying to reassure Strife, which proved that Cupid had sensed the worry from him. Although he got no reply, Joxer could feel the anxiety inside Strife ease a little at Cupid’s words.

 

“Ya sure? Thay’ll think ya can do bettah, ya know.” 

 

Strife was matter of fact about it but Joxer could feel the hurt from within the God; it was the sad acceptance and truth Strife felt, that made Joxer want to start dealing out vengeance to some of the Gods. He’d always known his friend had had problems and issues but he’d hoped most had only started after his emotional exile from the rest of the Gods, that Strife felt only slightly better about himself before the trouble began angered Joxer deeply. He was glad Cupid had been some happiness in Strife’s life but even that didn’t stop the Mischief God feeling disliked and unworthy of the rest of the Pantheon. Joxer got brief flashes, images he presumed were linked to the memory he was reliving; Discord hissing that he was nothing but a mistake of Fate, Athena wrinkling her face in disgust and staring at him in distaste, the look on Apollo’s face saying it all and Aphrodite’s look of horror as Cupid presented Strife to her.

 

Only Cupid’s quiet reassurances and love seemed to chip away the pain Strife held inside; “Then they don’t know you very well; if they did they’d know you were too good for me,” 

 

Cupid kissed Strife’s fingers as he spoke but his eyes were locked to the other God’s; Joxer could see the honesty in them but Strife obviously couldn’t as the words made him only uncomfortable. Joxer could sense Strife’s unease only lift slightly and so he was glad when Cupid continued,

 

“I hope you’ll believe me one day even if you don’t right now. Some of the God’s might be a little pissy yeah but only because they are jealous, besides with Dad and Hera backing us they won’t say anything,” Cupid smiled at him, “You know Dad’s really fond of you and you're totally Grandma’s favourite, she definitely thinks you’re way too good for me.”

 

Joxer felt Strife laugh at that before he heard the sound but it wasn’t a bitter or sarcastic laugh, it was more rueful; Joxer could sense, and was ashamedly surprised, that the words were true and that Strife never doubted it. Joxer had believed Ares had some kind of fondness for Strife which Cupids words and Strife’s feelings confirmed, something the mortal was pleased about; he was slightly confused about Hera, though he hadn’t seen her belittling or punishing Strife in any of his memories she hadn’t helped him either. A sudden thought caught Joxer’s attention and had he been wearing his own face he would have smiled; maybe the green-eyed monster curse on Cupid wasn’t for such petty reasons after all. 

 

“I do think we should wait though,” Joxer’s attention switched back to Cupid and Strife at the Love God’s words, “Only because Grandma will kill us, well me, if we don’t do the wedding first. You know she likes these things to be legitimate.” 

 

The hand caressing Strife’s stomach was slightly distracting Joxer but he tried to focus on Cupid’s words; as Cupid’s hand moved lower all thoughts of focussing on his words left Joxer’s mind and he and Strife groaned as one whilst the Love God worked his magic.


	12. Violent surprises

  
Author's notes: Thanks to Hallie for betaing and to Jo, for her brainstorming over this plot.  
  


* * *

Joxer moaned as teeth gently grazed from his earlobe, down his neck and nipped teasingly at the skin at the bottom; wetting his lips, Joxer made a noise in protest when the mouth was removed and he was rewarded with a familiar deep laugh as hands stroked his overheated and aroused body. A pout on his lips Joxer locked eyes with his lover and rocked his body, rubbing against Ares. Joxer could feel the God’s arousal but Ares seemed determined to make their foreplay as torturously slow and prolonged as possible; writhing under Ares expert caresses, Joxer didn’t know when he had fallen out of Strife’s memories and into his own dreams but he wasn’t about to complain or in any hurry to wake up. He just wanted more heated touches and teasing kisses. Joxer was happy to worship Ares in every method and manner possible but his dream lover seemed frustratingly hell-bent on stopping him; just as the mortal managed to get his hands on Ares exposed flesh he felt a chill permeate his body and a bright light assaulted his eyes as he did a full body jerk into the waking world. 

 

Coughing and spluttering the water from his mouth, Joxer rubbed his sore eyes and blinked back dots as the world slowly came into focus. Gabrielle’s frown and the half full bucket she held in her hands spoke volumes and Joxer eyed it slightly dubiously wondering if she was going to soak him again.

 

“Finally you’re awake,” Gabrielle’s voice was full of annoyance and Joxer had to suppress a wince as she stomped back to the fire and continued stirring the pots she was heating; that nasal a voice first thing in the morning set his teeth on edge and it was those days he wondered how he’d ever fancied himself in love with her- thank the God’s he’d grown out of it, for his sake and Strife’s. 

 

Joxer crawled out of his blanket, glad the cold water had effectively dispelled his arousal; he wrung most of the water out of the blanket and his shirt before laying them in full view of the sun to dry. “How long has everyone been up?” he asked, careful to keep his voice neutral, the last thing he needed was any arguments.

 

Making no attempt to hide her annoyance, Gabrielle stopped stirring the vegetables she was cooking and frowned at him, “Well over an hour. We were hoping to move on early today but since you sleep like the dead, Xena insisted we make breakfast and wait for you.” Her tone of voice said more then just her words implied. Gabrielle obviously wouldn’t have been bothered about leaving him behind, a fact that stung Joxer making it clear to him that it was time for him to travel on his own. Not bothering with a reply, Joxer stood up keeping his gaze firmly fixed away from her as he headed the short distance to the river to bathe; only Xena’s refusal to leave him and the memory of his dream pushed him back into good spirits again. 

 

Behind him, Gabrielle rolled her eyes turning her attention back to the (thankfully) finally cooked breakfast, her mouth dropping open in confusion as she stared down at the raw vegetables that barely simmered in the pan.

 

By the time Joxer had reached the river Gabrielle’s words had been forgotten and his arousal had returned with a vengeance so he quickly stripped off and walked into the chilly water. The river’s current was gentle enough that Joxer could wade into the middle and duck his body down briefly to rinse it. Vigorously rubbing his body with his cleaning rag, Joxer hoped that the rough treatment could do what the cold water could not. His hips were barely covered by the water when he stood up but his waning erection was hidden from view. Only when it was time to clean his stomach did Joxer pause; he was still worried about pressing too hard and upsetting the baby which was laughable in itself not only because Joxer had to be the only man in existence with that worry but because the baby in question was a God. 

 

As he stared down at his stomach Joxer suddenly realised the usually flat, almost concave, shape had been replaced by a very gently swelling directly between his hipbones. It looked very unusual and Joxer couldn’t help running his hand down his body and cupping it as he realised the tiny bump was Strife; a feeling of immense protectiveness flooded Joxer and he swallowed hard as he understood, for the first time, that Strife was truly being reborn. Joxer’s friend was coming back to him in the best way possible- as his son. *The most vulnerable way too,* that thought pushed Joxer to wade out of the river and pull his trousers back on, ignoring the damp patches. Joxer knew Strife would be vulnerable without his powers and more so inside the most accident prone person in Greece, only Asyinnitos comments about Strife choosing him for a father and the reassuring swell he could feel pushed his worries aside. Instead he focused on breakfast, satisfying the deep hunger inside him and finding the right words to tell Xena at the next village, that he wished to part ways. Joxer was saddened by the loss of Xena’s company more so then anyone else’s; only Iolaus came a slightly close second, Joxer having reached a new understanding with him. 

 

The mortal was so engrossed in wording his goodbyes properly that he didn’t notice the warning flash of colour behind him but did notice when something slammed against his back, forcing him face first against one of the trees and pinned him there. 

 

Joxer heard the loud crunch before he felt the blinding pain that shot across his face as his nose took the brunt of the damage; one cheek was pressed against the bark of the tree, the rough surface scraping it as Joxer’s unknown attacker held him firmly despite the man attempts to pull away. Tasting copper, Joxer choked as he realised blood was tricking from his nose and into his mouth but there was little he could do, struggling had no effect on the person pinning him, if he was even a person at all; judging by his strength and ability to sneak around, Joxer guessed he was more then just mortal, more like a God-a very angry God. The voice that spoke softly in his ear startled him, not only because it was unfamiliar and unexpected but also because it was so very young and sensual.

 

“If you think this is bad you should see what my brothers can do,” there was cold amusement in his attacker's voice but Joxer caught the hidden warning, he had no intention of inflaming his assailant and having him call for reinforcements. Remaining as still as possible, Joxer tried to listen ignoring how much his body wanted to tear away. 

 

“Which brings me to why I am here; brother’s or rather just one brother in fact, Cupid.” As the mortal digested the realisation that he was certainly dealing with a God, the God in question paused briefly as if to give Joxer time to interrupt before continuing, “he’s been through enough already as has the rest of my family they don’t need this forum or this hassle so back off!” The last words were punctuated by a malicious punch to his kidneys and Joxer gasped as a sharp pain shot across his lower back. His mind reeling at the implications, Joxer tried to answer him but only managed a whimper before the God spoke again.

 

“Tell Asyinnitos to stay away from Cupid or I’ll make sure that you, and any other mortal she favours, are spread so far across Greece that she’ll be lucky if she finds you all.” The God’s tone was cruel but final; he obviously had every intention of making good on his threat, which was enough to spur Joxer into action.

 

Opening his mouth to scream for Xena or Hercules, Joxer was roughly pulled away from the tree but before he could form the words he was viciously slammed back against it, his hands splayed either side of his head. This time the crunch was more pronounced and blood streamed into his mouth as Joxer gagged, his stomach threatening to revolt as the trunk dug into it. His stomach…. Bucking in horror, Joxer tried to push his stomach away from the tree and give the baby some room. His thoughts centred on protecting Strife, Joxer no longer thought of calling for the demigods as he fought wildly with his attacker, bucking and twisting as violently as possible to throw him off whilst his hands covered the tiny bump. Even as Joxer felt a warm hand firmly twist one arm behind him causing a slow burn to flood his skin he fought, determined to keep at least one hand over the vulnerable bulge. A hand gripped the hair at the back of his head and the mortal tried desperately to pull away as he guessed his attacker’s intentions. 

 

His mouth full of blood and gasping with exhaustion, Joxer mentally screamed to every Deity he knew could come as his head was smashed into the tree bark for the final time. It was a futile venture. Dizzy with exhaustion and from the pounding in his head, Joxer hung from his assailant’s hands unable to fight anymore. *I’m sorry I’m not a better fighter Strife, I hope you can protect yourself better then I can protect you,* The thought slowly crept through Joxer’s swimming mind as a few salty tears dropped from his eyes, the mortal couldn’t tell if his son had heard him or even if the baby was still alive, he just hoped someone would rescue them and save Strife.

 

As Joxer slumped against the tree the fight having taken its toll on his body, he felt a slight movement in his lower belly something he’d presumed to be either gas or food settling; as the movement came again Joxer closed his eyes trying to focus on it’s position, the strange gentle squirming was coming from the tiny bulge in his stomach and could only be one thing…Strife. 

 

Regardless of his situation, a slow smile curved Joxer’s lips as he ignored the murmured threats behind him and centred all his focus on his son, the pain in his body dull in comparison. Not aware that Asyinnitos had arrived mid attack, Joxer was oblivious to how much power she’d wrapped around Strife to protect him and bind his powers whilst she beat at the assaulting God with her fists. It was only when his assailant dropped him that Joxer’s focus returned; slumping against the tree in pain, he somehow managed to twist his body around so that he faced the two Deities. 

 

The God that had attacked him stood with his back to Joxer struggling with the panicked Goddess and purposefully blocking the mortal from her. Silently cheering when Asyinnitos managed to jab the God in his eye with her fist, Joxer managed to lock eyes with her as he struggled to pull himself up. He could see Asyinnitos was extremely pale and seemed to be straining though Joxer doubted it was the fighting that was responsible. Despite her size he’d seen the Goddess push Hercules to the ground without much effort, an impressive feat to Joxer. As the God tossed her casually aside and turned around, the anger on his face made Joxer’s stomach lurch upsetting Strife and making the baby squirm again; the mortal tried to back up against the tree trunk but his injured body refused to co-operate, all he could do was cover his stomach with his hands and stare helplessly up at the approaching menace.

 

Only when the God roughly lifted him up did Joxer see just how young his attacker was; the God appeared to be a teenager and not a very old teenager either, Joxer guessed he was no older then sixteen years. In confusion Joxer stared at him, taking in every detail of the God; even though he was dangling Joxer above the ground by his throat, the image in front of the mortal didn’t fit with the malicious attack. There was something familiar in the God’s features but Joxer couldn’t quite put his finger on it, his body was too battered and his mind too achy to process much more then what he saw in front of him.

 

The God was more then just gorgeous; he was beautiful and exuded a gentle sensuality that would, in any other situation, put a person at ease. Honey blonde hair surrounded the God’s face which curled at the neck adding to his youth; his dark blue eyes were piercing, framed by long dark lashes which gave him a slightly sultry look and the shape of his face and cheekbones almost enticed Joxer into cupping it with his hands. If his hands hadn’t been clawing at the God’s fingers, trying to release their hold. Joxer could only stare pleadingly at the God as he tried to peel the fingers from his throat; the mortal’s face was darkening by the second as he strained to breathe.

 

As oxygen became an issue, Joxer’s eyes dropped to Asyinnitos who had finally managed to stand up; as their eyes locked he saw fierce protectiveness in them, before she launched herself at the God’s back. Joxer felt the thump of her landing reverberate through the God’s arms and as the God dropped him to the floor, the mortal gasped in much needed air. Coughing and spluttering as he breathed Joxer almost doubled over as his lungs throbbed and he missed what would have been an entertaining view at any other time; Asyinnitos was clinging to the young God’s back, her toga askew as she wrapped her legs around his waist, her hands tugging at his face and hair; the young God was yelping in response as he tried to detach his determined leech and it appeared promising that the Goddess had the upper hand. Until the God flung himself back against a tree, which rocked violently as he slammed into it, squashing Asyinnitos in the process. As the God pulled himself from the tree, he easily dislodged the stunned Goddess and in a few quick strides, yanked Joxer to his unsteady feet. 

 

As Joxer attempted to pull away from the rough grip that bruised his arm and lifted him onto his toes, the man’s gaze caught the rest of the God’s body and he stilled in disbelief, his focus diverted. The God shook him roughly as he noticed the man’s focus, more in annoyance then anger, and Joxer noticed a deep red blush work its way down from the God’s cheeks to underneath his tunic; presumably all the way to the two softly swelling mounds which the tunic tried to discretely hide.

 

Using the distraction, Asyinnitos managed to gather her energy and stand up; however many years Asyinnitos had on the other God, what she was doing to keep Strife hidden and unharmed was putting a great strain on her. She didn’t even have enough power to muster one fireball, not that she would risk it with Joxer so close to her target, all her power was diverted to ensuring the foetus’s survival; the rough treatment recently administered would normally have damaged, if not killed, any unborn infant- Godly or mortal. The remnants of power she scraped together were spent screaming telepathically for Ares as she moved slowly forward toward Joxer, her hands outstretched as she tried negotiating with the God.

 

“Put Joxer down,” Asyinnitos voice was as level as she could manage; the God’s proximity to her charges and his rough treatment of them made her blood boil as well as terrified her. When the God didn’t respond she tried again, “Hermaphroditus please put him down.”

 

Staring into the face of his assailant, Joxer’s eyes widened as he caught the name and his mind started to catch up. Hermaphroditus, Aphrodite’s love child who was rumoured to be almost too beautiful for mortal eyes and of whom only a few tales had reached Joxer’s ears. Bard’s tended not to write much of him, save warnings of his pool; Joxer had never seen anything more then a shrine in dedication to the God.

 

Whether it was the use of his name or the tone of her voice, Asyinnitos managed to capture Hermaphroditus’ attention and the young God’s eyes flicked to her as she slowly moved next to them. The Goddess was obviously taking care not to startle or set Hermaphroditus off in a rage, instead she was gently manoeuvring herself between him and Joxer, her pleading eyes locked to the young Gods. 

 

“I’m sorry if something has upset you and if it was my curse…” Asyinnitos moved hurriedly on at the soft growl she got in response from Hermaphroditus, “But Zeus has decreed it cannot be lifted, hurting Joxer won’t change that; so please let him go. If you have a problem take it up with me, I'm to blame, he’s an innocent in it all and you’re still hurting him!” Her last few words were filled with horror and her plea held enough passion to convince the God to release Joxer-at least for now.

 

Loosening his grip, Hermaphroditus dropped Joxer to the floor eliciting a cry of pain from the injured mortal; an unhappy shamed look crossed the God’s face as he watched Joxer squirm backwards, as far away from him as possible, but the look faded after a moment and Hermaphroditus reached out to grab Asyinnitos by the shoulders instead.

 

The Goddess bit off a cry as Hermaphroditus shook her roughly and hissed in her face to ‘heed his warnings’; her power was still diverted to protect Strife and her energy levels were running too low to defend herself. She kept his gaze on Hermaphroditus but her power trained on Joxer and almost cried out in relief as the mortal managed to pull himself up. A split second later her whole body tensed as it came to her attention that Joxer was not running away, instead he had picked up a heavy branch and was advancing on Hermaphroditus, intent on forcing the God to release her. Squirming in an attempt to distract the God, Asyinnitos telepathically pleaded with the mortal to run and make his escape but Joxer being the man he was, refused to leave her in danger. The mortal wasn’t a hero by his strength and fighting skills but in every other sense of the word, he was a true Champion; a champion who would have, almost certainly, been blasted had help not arrived from an expected and extremely late quarter. 

 

The flash that heralded Ares arrival was impressive, bright enough to make Joxer drop his stick and shield his eyes, but the intense fury on the God’s face was even more so. When Joxer uncovered his eyes and viewed the War God, his first response was to be aroused and alarmed at the same time whereas Hermaphroditus wisely settled for mildly terrified, the fear evident on his face as he released Asyinnitos and flashed quickly out.

 

Sagging in relief, Joxer felt his battered body come down off its adrenaline high as his legs gave out and Ares managed to break his fall before he hit the ground. In dazed confusion Joxer stared up at Ares, whose glare had faded into a concerned frown as he eased the man into a comfortable laying position noting the blood and bruising. Joxer couldn’t tell what Ares was thinking which, given the God’s current train of thought, was probably a good thing since the War God was inwardly seething at the impetuousness of Hermaphroditus. Ares being an expert strategist had put things together in the same manner Hermaphroditus had; given that the War God had first believed Joxer was Asyinnitos plaything, it made sense to him that the other God would have thought the same and been willing to use the mortal against her. It enraged Ares that the Godling would dare go against him in blatant disregard of Zeus’ words or that Hermaphroditus would try to touch something Ares considered his, be it as worshipper or other interest.

 

The War God also noticed his cousin’s lack of energy as she crawled over to Joxer and laid her hands against his belly. Only concerned for Strife and Joxer, Asyinnitos ignored Ares’ presence as she scanned Joxer's body hoping that her power had protected the baby enough. She sighed in relief as she finished her scan, she could see Joxer was injured and in need of rest but the power around Strife had also protected his father from any severe internal injury and external ones, she could deal with. Throughout her scan Joxer was silent; it was only when her sigh broke the silence that he spoke, 

 

“Is he alright?” The man was hopeful that Strife had been protected but felt an enormous rush of relief as she nodded in confirmation, her smile widening as Joxer’s did. Neither Joxer nor Asyinnitos paid any attention to the War God behind them, neither one noticing his eyes narrow as he too scanned Joxer, Asyinnitos’ power levels to low to hide the mischief signature within the mortal. Had either looked at Ares, they would’ve noticed the disbelieving look that flooded the God’s face as he scanned Joxer for a second, then third and fourth time. 

 

Ares couldn’t believe what he was sensing; he was normally prepared for everything, not willing to leave much open to Fate and never really surprised. What he saw when he scanned Joxer took him far above shock and surprise, into something completely different. Ares scanned the tiny signature within Joxer one last time, not because he expected it to change but because he felt compelled to, and felt the flicker of his nephew’s soul. His dead nephew’s soul. The nephew he’d believed was Joxer’s father because Ares could sense something of the mischief God in him. Ares didn’t know whether to laugh or cry. He was amazed at his own ability to overlook the obvious and the completely insane. He was also impressed by the level of sneakiness and subterfuge some of his family members were capable of concocting, Asyinnitos and Cupid being the biggest offenders. Ares wasn’t sure if he should be insulted that no one saw fit to bring him in on the secret but the joy that filled him at a second chance with Strife overwhelmed the thought. Until he remembered Hermaphroditus’ attack on Joxer and the danger both the mortal and his unborn nephew were placed in. 

 

Bending down next to Asyinnitos, Ares grasped her arm watching as the happy light faded from her eyes when she observed his expression. Ares guessed Hermaphroditus had planned to punish Joxer for Asyinnitos influence on Cupid and her cursing of Aphrodite. That itself was no one’s fault but the Godling’s whom Ares had every intention of chastising, but Asyinnitos had obviously taken responsibility for Joxer and she’d let him down, even if it was accidental. Ares valued the life within Joxer and was staring to appreciate the value of Joxer too much to let anything happen to either of them. 

 

"Don’t ever hide something like this from me or put either of them at risk again. If you ever do,” Ares paused as he stared down at the paling Goddess, “I'm going to hurt you." He caught her chin with his fingers as she started to look away and forced her to look into his eyes, giving her some of his power to boost her energies as he spoke. “Don’t make me do that. Tell me the truth in future.” As he let her chin go Ares glanced at the man next to her, who had frozen in panic; Ares fingers hesitantly reached out stopping about a millimeter from Joxer’s belly before they drew back.

 

“Take him to Olympus and get him healed,” Ares words were soft but commanding nevertheless. He knew Asyinnitos would probably take him to her temple or to Gaia’s and either place was safer for him then Greece at the moment. At least until Ares had warned off Hermaphroditus and taken his own precautions to ensure Joxer and Strife’s safety. The last thing Ares saw before Asyinnitos did as he ordered was the look of trepidation on Joxer’s face. As the flash of their departure died down Ares decided to take it upon himself to make sure he never saw that look again. Ares had seen not to mention put better expressions on Joxer’s face and he fully intended, despite the circumstances, to keep seducing the mortal. Strife was a great bonus and an added problem in the seduction but Ares was determined to work around him.

 

The War God surveyed the clearing, noting the blood smeared tree and cleaning it with a thought. He paused in the process as he sensed his annoying half brother and friends nearby and an evil but justified thought hit him. Not one of the four had noticed the trauma Joxer had been through, nor come to search for him at any point, which didn’t sit well with Ares. Loyalty was a big must in War and it irked Ares when it was given but not received, he’d done it before to Joxer but at least he was making the effort to redeem himself. One hand movement later and the blood smears were back, ready for the heroes to find if they bothered to look. 

 

Ares glanced one last time around the small clearing, understanding the worst outcome that could have become reality so very easily, before he flashed out leaving only silence and blood smears behind him. 

 

 

TBC


End file.
